- Helen Lovejoy: [about Michelangelo's statue of David] It's filth! It graphically portrays parts of the human body, which, as practical as they may be, are evil!
- [Marge's plan to get "Itchy and Scratchy" off the air backfires]
- Marge: I guess one person *can* make a difference... but most of the time they probably shouldn't.
- Roger Meyers Jr.: Take a letter, Miss White. Dear valued viewer, thank you for taking an interest in the Itchy and Scratchy program. Enclosed is a personally autographed photo of America's favorite cat and mouse team to add to your collection. In regards to your specific comments about the show, our research indicates that one person cannot make a difference, no matter how big a screwball she is, so let me close by saying...
- Marge: [reading the letter] And the horse I rode in on?
- [crumples the letter]
- Marge: I'll show them what one screwball can do!
- Roger Meyers Jr.: That screwball Marge Simpson. We've got to stop her! But how?
- Animator #1: Drop an anvil on her?
- Animator #2: Hit her on the head with a piano.
- Animator #3: Stuff her full of TNT, then throw a match down her throat and run?
- Roger Meyers Jr.: All your fancy degrees and that's the best you can do? You make me sick!
- [the writers all meekly agree]
- Stupid Squrrial: Don't do that! Don't do that!
- Stupid Squrrial: Hey! Don't do that!
- [ITchy smacks her head off like a baseball with a baseball bat]