- Colonel Jack O'Neill: If it wasn't for SG-1, right now you'd be sittin' there with a snake in your head, instead of your head up your a...
- General Bauer: [shouting] Colonel!
- Senator Robert Kinsey: How dare you come into my house waving a gun?
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Not waving; pointing.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: [to Maybourne] I see you're on that famous beer and mustard diet. How's that workin' out for ya?
- Senator Robert Kinsey: Given the chance, half of all American citizens won't even vote and the half that do vote are too stupid to know what they're doing.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: Which explains how you got elected.
- Colonel Jack O'Neill: [Senator Kinsey's wife comes to the door while O'Neill and Maybourne are outside] Good afternoon, ma'am; I'm Mr. Starsky and this is... Hutch.
- Senator Robert Kinsey: The only currency in this town *is* power. So if I have to shake hands with the devil in order to do the Lord's work, so be it.