- Valerie Hogan: You don't get awarded medals for bein' married - you get anniversaries! And since I got seventeen of them, that makes me the veteran here!
- Willie Hogan: I can't wait 'til he gets here!
- Mark Hogan: Yeah, me neither. He promised, next time he saw us, he'd teach us how to kill a man with a pocket comb.
- Darlene Franklin: When you proposed, you said I would be your little co-pilot. But you haven't even given me a copy of the flight plan!
- Mark Hogan: How come you slept on the couch?
- David Hogan: Well, 'cause Uncle Skip ended up sleeping in the den.
- Mark Hogan: Well, why didn't he sleep with Darlene?
- David Hogan: You're gifted - figure it out.
- Mark Hogan: Whose side are you on - Uncle Skip or Darlene?
- Valerie Hogan: I'm not on anybody's side! I mean, this is not a spectator sport.
- David Hogan: She's on Darlene's.
- Skip Franklin: Come on, son - speak your mind! Move, move, move!
- David Hogan: Well... I think she's a real nice person, y'know? Uh... She seems to love you a lot... And I think you love her, y'know? I mean, look, Uncle Skip - you waited a long time to get married. And when you did, you asked Darlene. And that's gotta mean something... Look - I think you'd be making a big mistake if you let her get away.
- Valerie Hogan: David - make sure the troops use the crosswalks!
- David Hogan: Yes, ma'am!
- Valerie Hogan: Dismissed!