- Drew Carey: [after "Questionable Impressions"] Colin, Peter Graves, Humphrey Bogart, no wonder our 18-34 year old demographics are doing so well here on "Whose Line".
- [laughs]
- Drew Carey: [in "Hoedown", about doctors]
- [singing]
- Drew Carey: I love goin' to my doctor, it gives me such a thrill. / I go to my doctor even when I am not ill. / Now you may think that I am in a rut, / But I am not, you see, his nurse's gots a nice butt.
- [mild audience laughter]
- Drew Carey: [talking] Uh, 'cause that's why I go to the doctor, 'cause his nurse got... fuck you, man! This is bullshit, man!
- [Wayne calms him down]
- Ryan Stiles: [in "Greatest Hits", about songs of Las Vegas] I tell ya, Col, the excitement never stops.
- Colin Mochrie: That's right, and the music never ends. And we've combined the two: The music that never ends, and the something that never stops, to... music that never ends or stops. And it's all about Vegas!
- Ryan Stiles: That's right, Colin. The money, the celebrities. Why, our own Drew Carey, is a frequent visitor here, to Las Vegas.
- [Drew smiles smugly]
- Colin Mochrie: That's right!
- Ryan Stiles: And I think one of my favorite...
- [looks at Colin]
- Colin Mochrie: I was just agreeing, and looking perky!
- Wayne Brady: [in "Questionable Impressions"]
- [imitating James Brown]
- Wayne Brady: You ready to go find a cook? Hey!
- Colin Mochrie: Why would Peter Graves, need a gun?
- [after audience laughter]
- Colin Mochrie: Do you know it's "child actor week" on "Biography"?
- [Drew laughs]
- Wayne Brady: You ready to go apprehend the culprit?
- Colin Mochrie: Do you know I used to be on "Mission: Impossible"?
- [walks off the stage]
- Ryan Stiles: [in "Greatest Hits"] What comes to mind when I say vodka, spies, and the Kremlin?
- Colin Mochrie: A good way to spend twenty bucks.
- Ryan Stiles: American, right?
- Colin Mochrie: That's right!
- Ryan Stiles: No, Col, I'm talking about Russia.
- Colin Mochrie: That's right.
- Ryan Stiles: I'm not sure, but I think... I think Simply Red might be a Russian band!
- Wayne Brady: [in "Questionable Impressions"]
- [on his knees and pretending to have thick glasses, with high-pitched voice]
- Wayne Brady: Did you know the human head weighs eight pounds?
- Brad Sherwood: Are you Elton John, or Gary Coleman?
- Wayne Brady: Haven't you ever seen "Jerry Maguire"?
- Brad Sherwood: Why are you looking at me through binoculars?
- Wayne Brady: Why are you being mean to the cutest eight-year-old on TV?
- [audience cheers]
- Brad Sherwood: I'm going to go drown myself.