- Will Truman: So now you're skipping work all together?
- Grace Adler: I called in sick.
- Will Truman: Called who? You're the boss.
- Grace Adler: I know. It was a strange conversation. If I do it again, I'm gonna fire me.
- Karen Walker: [Talking to Rosario over the phone] Listen, I'm gonna need you to feed the kids and read 'em something before bedtime.
- [Pauses while Rosario responds]
- Karen Walker: Well, I don't know, honey. Why don't you read them that book they love? "Green Eggs and I'm Hammered!"
- Jack McFarland: What do you think of my glasses? What do they say?
- Will Truman: Guys don't make passes at girls who wear glasses.
- Jack McFarland: And guys don't make passes at guys with fat asses!