Futurama (TV Series)

Parasites Lost (2001)

Billy West: Philip J. Fry, Dr. Zoidberg, Prof. Hubert J. Farnsworth

Quotes 

• Dr. Zoidberg : We'll need to have a look inside you with this camera.

  [Fry opens his mouth] 

  Dr. Zoidberg : Guess again.

• Fry : Everyone out of my body or the brain gets it!

  The Lord Mayor of Cologne : He's bluffing. No creature would voluntarily make an idiot of itself.

  Fry : Obviously, you've never been in love.

• [Fry walks out of a bathroom carrying a "Fresh" Egg Salad Sandwich he just bought from a dispenser] 

  Bender : What's that black cracker?

  Fry : A tomato.

  Leela : You're not going to eat a sandwich from a truck stop men's room, are you?

  Fry : Eh, what's the worst thing that could happen?

  [Takes a bite] 

  Fry : Ehh, it's like a party in my mouth, and everyone's throwing up.

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : If we can stimulate that nerve, the bowel will convulse, expelling the entire worm society.

  Hermes Conrad : But what about the worms in the other parts of his body?

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : Listen, this is going to be one hell of a bowel movement. Afterwards he'll be lucky if he has any bones left.

• [Smart Fry visits Leela's apartment] 

  Fry : Apartment 1-I. The old me would have made fun of that.

• [after shrinking down to microscopic size in order to enter Fry's body, Zoidberg comes in riding a sperm] 

  Dr. Zoidberg : Yippy ki yay. Guess where I've been.

• Bender : Where are we? The ass?

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : We're in the heart, better known as the love muscle.

  Dr. Zoidberg : Where the food is digested.

• [Fry has been impaled by a lead pipe and is seeing Zoidberg for help] 

  Dr. Zoidberg : Oh, the hypochondriac's back! So what is it this time?

  Fry : Well, my lead pipe hurts a little.

  Dr. Zoidberg : That's normal. Next patient.

• [Zoidberg scrapes cholesterol off Fry's artery] 

  Dr. Zoidberg : It's good cholesterol, but it spreads like bad cholesterol.

• Amy Wong : Look! They're jazzercising Fry's muscles.

  Hermes Conrad : He'll be as strong and flexible as Gumby and Hercules combined.

  Dr. Zoidberg : Gumbercules? I love that guy!

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : [whispers]  Shh, be very quiet. We're in the ear.

  Amy Wong : [whispers]  Okay, Professor.

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : WHAT?

• Leela : I haven't felt this happy since Double Soup Tuesday at the orphanarium.

  Fry : When I'm with you, every day feels like Double Soup Tuesday.

• [the gang are operating microscopic VR robots of themselves. Their mission is to enter Fry bowels and rid him of parasitic worms] 

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : In each Gastro Survival Kit, you'll find a rain slicker, a disposable Fun Camera and something to protect you against bacteria, a harpoon!

• Fry : Of all the parasites I've had over the years, these worms are among the... hell, they are the best.

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : If we don't get rid of the worms now, they'll burrow so deep in the bowel that not even Hermes' famous jerk prunes couldn't dislodge them.

  Hermes Conrad : I call it Caribbean drain-o.

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : Brace yourselves, everyone. We're entering the interior of Fry's nose.

  Bender : We're at finger alert five, people.

• [Fry threatens the parasites in his colon] 

  Fry : I hope Satan has a nice colon, 'cause that's where you're gonna be living.

• Bender : Yo, old guy. Why do we need to use those tiny microdroids? Can't you just shrink us?

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : Oh, my, no. That would require extremely tiny atoms, and have you priced those lately? I'm not made of money. Leave me alone!

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : Anyhoo, your net suits will let you experience Fry's worm-infested bowels as if you were actually wriggling through them.

  Dr. Zoidberg : There's no part of that sentence I didn't like.