The Simpsons (TV Series)

Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song (1994)

Harry Shearer: Principal Skinner, Ned Flanders, Ned's Father

Photos 

Quotes 

• Principal Skinner : Now I... I finally have time to do what I've always wanted: write the great American novel. Mine is about a futuristic amusement park where dinosaurs are brought to life through advanced cloning techniques. I call it "Billy and the Cloneasaurus."

  Apu : Oh, you have got to be kidding sir. First you think of an idea that has already been done. Then you give it a title that nobody could possibly like. Didn't you think this through...

  [fade to later] 

  Apu : ... it was on the bestseller list for eighteen months! Every magazine cover had...

  [later] 

  Apu : ... one of the most popular movies of all time, sir! What were you thinking?

  [pause] 

  Apu : I mean, thank you, come again.

• Ned Flanders : Let's thank the Lord for another beautiful day.

  Superintendent Chalmers : "Thank the Lord"? That sounded like a prayer. A prayer in a public school. God has no place within these walls, just like facts don't have a place within an organized religion.

• Superintendent Chalmers : Seymour.

  Principal Skinner : Hmm?

  Superintendent Chalmers : You're fired!

  Principal Skinner : I'm sorry, did... did you just call me a liar?

  Superintendent Chalmers : No, I said you were fired.

  Principal Skinner : Oh. That's much worse.

• Bart Simpson : Principal Skinner? Um, I'm real sorry about my dog getting you fired, and biting you, and then getting it on with your leg.

  Principal Skinner : Well... maybe it was for the best.

• Principal Skinner : [Jimbo walks into the laundry and steals Skinner's underpants]  Hey!

  Jimbo Jones : [Chanting]  We got Skinner's Underpants! And there's nothing you can do about it, Mr. Ex-Principal.

  Principal Skinner : That's not true. I can buy a new pair!

  [checks his wallet and finds it is empty] 

  Principal Skinner : No I can't. I needed those, I really did.