American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile (2006 Video)

Ross Thomas: Ryan

Photos 

Quotes 

• Bull : Stifler! We got a serious problem, man. Mike and the guys just got arrested trying to steal a monkey from the zoo.

  Dwight Stifler : So what's the problem? Just take the money from my bail fund.

  Bull : They're almost half of our football team. We gotta put a team on the field, man, or we are done.

  Erik Stifler : Why?

  Bull : Cause we are already on probation. We got to participate in every intermural event or we are kicked off campus, man. We are four guys short.

  Ryan : I play football.

  Cooze : I played freshman year.

  Bull : What about you?

  Erik Stifler : A little nerf here and there.

  Bull : Good enough.

  Bull : Stifler?

  Dwight Stifler : Mmm?

  Bull : Can you play?

  Dwight Stifler : Don't ever ask if Stifler can play!

• Ryan : Gentlemen, it's Friday afternoon we've got a full tank of gas, a quarter ounce of weed, 3 cases of beer, a 10 pound tank of nitrous, we're under age...

  Cooze : And I'm too drunk to drive!

  Ryan : Hit it!

• Alexis : [1:26:20]  You know I don't usually go for the Surburban Jock, Abercrombie Clones.

  Ryan : I tend to have that effect on Pacifist, Vegan Bisexuals.

• Ryan : [46:10]  I can't believe we lost to midgets.

  Dwight Stifler : Don't let those oompa-loompa bastards get to you. Right now we have more important matters to tend to, gentlemen!

• Cooze : [30:54]  Just think next year i'll be going here.

  Ryan : Yea thanks to daddy and his alumni connections.

  Cooze : Hey fuck off i told you i got in because of my SAT scores.

  Ryan : You scored 5 points over being legally retarded.