Lucy: The Daughter of the Devil (TV Series)

He's Not the Messiah, He's a DJ (2005)

Jessi Klein: Lucy

Quotes 

• Satan : Look, I paid for your stupid art school, didn't I? And I got you a dog! A hypoallergenic dog, mind you, cause you're allergic...

  Lucy : Excuse me, did you just say "stupid" art school? Dad?

  Satan : No! Art is not stupid... Lucy.

• Lucy : Hey, you! I love this! It sounds great!

  DJ Jesus : You know, I can't hear you, but I can read your lips. You're like "Blah blah blah great", right?

• Dog : KILL YOURSELF... KILL YOURSELF... KILL YOURSELF... KILL YOURSELF...

  Ethan : It's all for you, Lucy! **Jumps out window**

  Lucy : ...Bad dog.

• The Senator : Uh... focusing on ME now. Attention turns back to me, please!

  Lucy : Please fuck off!

• Lucy : Dad, I gotta go. I'm going out. We'll talk another time.

  Satan : Oh, oh, oh, oh. Wait, wait.

  Lucy : Have another drink.

  Satan : I have a favor to ask you.

  Lucy : What's the favor?

  Satan : I mean, a present... to give you. I have a present to give you.

  Lucy : What is it?

  Satan : I want you to go out on a date with a friend of mine, who is a U.S. Senator. Right? He's rich and...

  Lucy : Ew.

  Satan : He's good looking. Sort of.

• Lucy : I've actually met a nice guy and I'm with him right now. Which is why I can't talk, so please let me go, okay? Goodbye!

  Satan : Well, I'll tell you something, Lucy. I don't think this "nice guy" is going to be a part of your life for much longer.

  Lucy : What does that...

  Satan : Hmm?

  Lucy : I said, what does that mean?

  Satan : Nothing...

  Lucy : Dad!

  Satan : Ha ha...

  Lucy : YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE!

  Satan : MWAHAHAHA. Sorry.

• The Senator : So'd you like riding over here in a helicopter?

  Lucy : Um, no! I actually think it's a total waste of energy to take a helicopter 8 blocks.

  The Senator : I know! It's hilarious, isn't it?

• The Senator : You're playing it pretty cool with me! Very "get out of my face"! Very "I'm not impressed with your power and money"!

  Lucy : You are an ENORMOUS douchebag!