- Will Truman: Jack, she's just doing her job. I think that's the first time I used the words "Jack" and "job" in the same sentence without "needs to get a" in between.
- Will Truman: Are you ready for a bag full of happiness, and I am not talking about your stoner days.
- Grace Adler: Karen?
- Karen Walker: Yeah?
- Grace Adler: Why do you want to work for me?
- Karen Walker: Well honey, because I adore you. And because I always work before I marry money... I joke, of course I mean Stan. I joke, of course I mean money! Hahahahaha...
- Will Truman: Jack! I have better things to do than go through every little meaningless job you've ever gone through because of a cute boss or I don't know, a good couch in the men's room. So will you just give me some space!
- Jack McFarland: And so ends a scene from 'Mr. Bitch Goes to Washington!'
- [Jack applauds him]
- Karen Walker: Men hate change.
- Grace Adler: Well, usually, you can't lump Will in with other men, he's...
- Grace Adler: Oh, honey, come on, gay, straight, bi, Thai, they don't like change.
- Grace Adler: What is that? Like an Upper East Side Haiku?
- Will: Jack, I'm trying to do my job. Yeah, now that's the first time I've ever said 'Jack' and 'job' in a sentence without 'needs to get a' in between. I'm sorry. Grace is upset with her bathroom.
- Jack: Yeah, cause it's too small for her. It's too small for Malibu Barbie. Will, why don't you just share your bathroom. Ya know, I think that's the first time I've said 'Will' and 'share' in a sentence without 'doesn't know how to' in between.