- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: This is a complete and total, you know, sausage festival.
- Toki Wartooth: I love sausage festival!
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: What?
- Toki Wartooth: Like in Vienna.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: No - no, Toki, that *was* a sausage festival.
- Toki Wartooth: Yeah, that was good.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Yeah. It was the Vienna pork saus - um, no, this means that there's no good-looking ladies to put you-know-what intoside of them.
- Toki Wartooth: The sausage?
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: [short pause] Yeah. Anyway, what were you talking about, like, a second ago? I'm sorry I cut you off.
- Toki Wartooth: Oh, I gots to make something for Murderface. I gonna make him a macaroni murder lady.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: I'm sure he'll hate that. Eh, pardon me.
- [he walks away]
- Pickles the Drummer: Hey douchebag!
- [car is lowered down]
- Pickles the Drummer: Happy birthday!
- Nathan Explosion: Well what do you think?
- Toki Wartooth: Big fat tires and everything!
- William Murderface: But I already got, like, a million limos.
- Pickles the Drummer: Dude, not like this one. This is the limo that Kennedy got his brains smashed open in with a bullet.
- Nathan Explosion: It's all souped up... and desecrated.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Yeah, dude, and the driver's seat is the chair from, like, where President Wrinkloln was shot. And assassinated in.
- Pickles the Drummer: And... you're entered in the first ever Dethklok Dethmolition Klok-a-matae Deth Derby!
- Toki Wartooth: And I made you this macaroni murder lady! What used to be the red hots were the blood, but I ates them.
- William Murderface: You mean I get to destroy United States history... literally?
- [sheds a bloody tear]
- Nathan Explosion: And now, the blackest present for the most brutal of all bass players...
- [empty box drops from ceiling]
- Nathan Explosion: Nothing!
- William Murderface: Awww you suck! You all suck!
- [walks off stage]
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Oh yeah? How bout you go play records backwards and go kill yourself?
- Pickles the Drummer: Hey fatso, we got your favourite thing: disappointment!
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Hey Pickle, tell Murderface what you just told me about that guy.
- Pickles the Drummer: Oh, right.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: It's hilarious.
- Pickles the Drummer: That dude he headbutted? That guy was a Danish prince! Can you believe that?
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: [disgustedly] Pfft. The Dutch.
- Pickles the Drummer: Oh, check it out, he's got a brain contusion and a fractured skull. Oh, and he's last in line for the Danish royalty. That is messed up, dude.
- William Murderface: Well, that's what he gets for goin' after my hog.
- Pickles the Drummer: Awesome.
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Dude, I would've done the same thing.
- [rolls his eyes]
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Dutch.
- Pickles the Drummer: Yeah, well, it's official. I mean, you're gettin'... really... good at headbuttin'.
- Nathan Explosion: Ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the party. And as you all know, no party is complete without a birthday party clown. And we got one of the finest rock and roll clowns - around, so please - put it - your hands - to - you know... here comes the rock and roll clown.
- Dr. Rockso: Ooh, ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-ka-yeah! I'm Dr. Rockso, the rock and roll clown! I do cocaine! Ah-ka-ka-ka-yeah!
- [Murderface covers his face in disgust]
- Dr. Rockso: I hear it's somebody's birthday! I do COCAINE!
- [he inflates a long, skinny balloon with a silent fart]
- Dr. Rockso: Dr. Rockso gonna make you a BALLOON bass!
- [sotto voce to Murderface]
- Dr. Rockso: I seriously do... a lotta cocaine.
- [he turns his back to the crowd as he ties the balloons together, then faces front again]
- Dr. Rockso: Try it out!
- [he hands Murderface a Bootsy Collins Space Bass balloon]
- Dr. Rockso: Wait a minute: I think someone's outta tune!
- [he twists a "knob" on the "bass"]
- Dr. Rockso: Just a little more.
- [the "knob" part of the balloon pops on Murderface's head]
- Dr. Rockso: You popped a string! Ha-ho! I do coc...
- [he chokes as Murderface shoves the long part of the balloon down his throat]
- Nathan Explosion: [Murderface is attempting to sneak out of Mordhaus after his disastrous birthday party. He is suddenly blinded by a spotlight from an overhead helicopter, which lowers the rest of the band, wearing camouflage and night-vision goggles, down to the ground on ziplines] Attention! You big baby!
- Skwisgaar Skwigelf: Ah, what are you doing, going for a crybaby walk?
- William Murderface: Hey, why's everybody wearin' camouflage? You joinin' the Marines?
- Nathan Explosion: We wanted to, uh, surprise you... in outfits.
- William Murderface: Look like a stupid Navy SEAL.
- Nathan Explosion: That's part of the surprise.
- William Murderface: Why?
- Nathan Explosion: Because it makes us harder to see. And that's awesome.
- William Murderface: [at the Louvre] Thirty-thousand pieces of art, and what do you know. They all stink like sh...
- [cuts to the Louvre in flames]
- French guy: Vive Dethklok!