(1998 Video)

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Paper-thin but entertaining Kobe Tai vehicle
lor_14 April 2017
Recently watching a cross-section of Vivid pictures covering a couple of decades only underscores my decision back when to avoid the label's output -too slick and phony for my taste. With Dyanna Lauren as writer and director I could hardly resist this minor offering, merely a quickie vehicle for contract star Kobe Tai that like one of those M.I. audio tapes Mr. Phelps (Peter Graves) used to listen to at the beginning of each TV show, self-destructs almost immediately after.

Kobe and contrasting co-star Rebecca Wild (diff. ethnicities, personalities and most significantly breast sizes) are students in an art class conducted by the show's makeup man Richard Gold -fellow students are cameos by familiar faces including auteur Lauren and other crew members. Kobe's boyfriend is a crazed artist, preposterously over- acted by Bobby Vitale, one of those actor's actors beloved in Adult Cinema but who irritates (or bores) me. His antics of mistreating Kobe, carrying on like a madman and covering his face and body with enough paint to replace Michael Ansara in some old Hollywood cowboys & Indians epic are off-putting rather than humorous.

When not sketching and ogling sexy models in class, including John West (who some idiot identified as John Strong in the IMDb credits until I fixed the mistake) and hot Teri Starr, Kobe heads for her rooftop to tell her troubles to a nude statue, played very well in motionless mannequin fashion by Vince Vouyer (with a nod to aforementioned Richard Gold for the excellent gray makeup that makes VV look like a real statue).

This homely ploy eventually moves Lauren's story into the realm of fantasy, as the statue predictably comes to life in the final reel to hump Kobe. Ending is quite satisfying in the Romantic tradition and makes me want to overlook most of director Lauren's shortcomings along the way.

Kobe is alluring as usual but is of course upstaged by Wild's ginormous breasts, especially in a giddy scene staged in Black Light when the two beauties writhe around covered in pastel -mainly pink - body paint to create art (and Lesbian sex) in the manner of a '60s Sexploitation film.

The studs perform well servicing Wild, Kobe and Teri, but Vivid's safe sex nonsense has even the statue wearing a condom, destroying the fantasy aspect of Vouyer springing to life. Feature runs a truly skimpy 71 minutes plus five minutes of bloopers (mainly Vouyer trying not to break up as Kobe taunts his motionless statue) running during the end credits as padding.
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