Adventures of the Gummi Bears (TV Series)

Trading Faces (1991)

Michael Rye: Duke Igthorn, King Gregor, Sir Victor Igthorn

Quotes 

• Duke Igthorn : Lovely day for an ambush, wouldn't you say, Greg?

• Sir Victor Igthorn : [Calla faints when he kisses her hand]  Oh, if only I could fell villains with similar ease.

• Duke Igthorn : So, you can cook and clean, Vic, but can you fight?

  Sir Victor Igthorn : I'll let thou be the judge, Sigmund.

• Duke Igthorn : You don't scare me, you... you clothes-washer!

  Sir Victor Igthorn : At least I wash mine, Siggy Soggyshorts!

• Duke Igthorn : It's obvious taking King Gregor's crown isn't going to be easy with my goody-two-shoes brother around.

  Toadwart : [with an ice pack on his head]  Painfully obvious.

• Duke Igthorn : [imitating Sir Victor]  "Thou shalt never be king, Sigmund!"

  Toadwart : [claps]  Hey, that's a pretty nifty impression. Except for black-hearted Dukie's beard, you could almost be twins.

  Duke Igthorn : [turning]  What, did you say?

  Toadwart : Sorry. You're much more handsome.

• Sir Victor Igthorn : This courtly life is not for me, Your Majesty. Ah, what I wouldn't give to be trouncing a vandal right now.

• Sir Victor Igthorn : My lord, if I could trounce that beast, I would meet my good deeds quota for the week.

• Sir Victor Igthorn : What is that haunting scent thou art wearing? Eau de lilac?

  Toadwart : Nope. Eau de lights-out.

  [sprays him with sleeping gas] 

• Duke Igthorn : Night-night, White Knight.

• King Gregor : So it went well, then?

  Duke Igthorn : [disguised as Sir Victor, grabs a mace from the wall]  I'd say things are definitely looking up for me.

  King Gregor : Because I sincerely hope you've been looking forward to this moment.

  Duke Igthorn : [advancing behind him]  Thou hast no idea just how much I've been looking forward to this...

• Cavin : Tell us how you smote the four beasts of Dezenhurst.

  Duke Igthorn : [in his face disguised as Sir Victor]  With a very big stick.

• Duke Igthorn : [signing autographs disguised as Sir Victor]  What torture.

• Sir Victor Igthorn : Have mercy, you villainous vermin. I would sooner brave the perils of thine pit than tolerate thine ear-piercing performance.

• King Gregor : It's a shame you weren't in the mood for storytelling.

  Duke Igthorn : [taking a tapestry down acting as Sir Victor]  Why, I'll tell thee a story, dear king...

  [in his own voice] 

  Duke Igthorn : But I don't think you'll find the ending to be a happy one.

  [throws the tapestry over him] 

• Toadwart : Eat your words, mush mouth! Or feel the wrath of King...

  Duke Igthorn : [offscreen]  TOADWART! WHERE ARE YOU?

  Toadwart : Dukie!

• Toadwart : Nauseating brother and stupid horse not done away with yet.

  Sir Victor Igthorn : Thou can call me names, but *no one calls my horse stupid*!

• Duke Igthorn : Now sign on the dotted line and you'll be a free though crownless man.

• Duke Igthorn : My new toy will do splendid things for your figure, Greg.

• Duke Igthorn : [sees Victor on the floor]  I thought you did away with him, Mush-for-Brains!

  [drop-kicks Toadwart into Victor's lap, then storms out] 

  Duke Igthorn : Ogres! Get me that king!

  Sir Victor Igthorn : Get off me, you little n'er-do-well!

  [drop-kicks Toadwart into the wall, then runs out] 

  Toadwart : Yep. They're brothers, all right.

• King Gregor : There must be some way out of this dreadful place.

  Duke Igthorn : [from behind]  There is. But not for you.

• Duke Igthorn : [the ogres beat Igthorn, still in his Sir Victor disguise, before realizing it]  Now, look. Don't mangle Sir Victor, or anyone who looks like him, 'til I give the order.

  Sir Victor : [coming in disguised as Igthorn]  All right, you loony goons. Now *I'm* giving the order: Mangle him!

  Gad : Okey-dokey, Dukie!

  Duke Igthorn : No, you fools, no!

  [the ogres lunge at him, he runs away, tearing off his disguise] 

  Duke Igthorn : It's me - DUKIEEE!

• Duke Igthorn : [being chased by the ogres]  IT'S ME - DUKIEEE!

• [last lines] 

  King Gregor : I hope you will return to Dunwyn soon, Sir Victor.

  Sir Victor Igthorn : Soon will not be soon enough.

  [to Calla] 

  Sir Victor Igthorn : And to the sweet princess, farewell.

  [kisses Calla's hand, making her blush] 

  Princess Calla : Now that's more like it.

  [faints]