- [X dials the number for an Evil Life Coach:]
- Perfectionist: Hi. I've changed my menu options, so please listen carefully. For landscaping, press one. Dog walking, press two. Nude housecleaning, press any key any time...
- X, the Eliminator: [impatiently] Come on, come on, come on...
- Perfectionist: If you need an Evil Life Coach, press four.
- [X presses four]
- X, the Eliminator: [awkwardly] Hi... uh, heh... Well, I saw your ad, and uh...
- Voice Mail Prompt: You have... ten... seconds.
- X, the Eliminator: [frantically] PLEASE HELP ME, I'M NOT EVIL ENOUGH! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! MAKE ME EVIL!