The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (TV Series)

Episode #1.4 (1981)

Richard Vernon: Slartibartfast

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Quotes 

• Slartibartfast : Excuse the mess. Most unfortunate. A diode blew in one of the life support computers. When we came to revive our cleaning staff, we discovered they'd been dead for thirty thousand years. Who's going to clear away the bodies? That's what no-one seems to have an answer for.

• Arthur Dent : You know, this explains a lot. Because all my life, I've had this unaccountable feeling in my bones that something sinister was happening in the universe and that no one would tell me what it was.

  Slartibartfast : Oh, no. That's just perfectly normal paranoia. Everyone in the universe has that.

• Arthur : I seem to be having this tremendous difficulty with my lifestyle.

  Slartibartfast : I beg your pardon?

  Arthur : What? Oh, sorry. Fatuous thing to say, really.

  Slartibartfast : I thought so.

• Slartibartfast : Perhaps I'm old and tired, but I always think the chances of finding out what really is going on are so absurdly remote that the only thing to do is to say "Hang the sense of it" and just keep yourself occupied.

• Slartibartfast : Science has achieved some wonderful things, I know, but I'd far rather be happy than right any day.

  Arthur Dent : And are you?

  Slartibartfast : No. That's where it all falls down, of course.

  Arthur Dent : Pity, it sounded like rather a good lifestyle otherwise.

• Slartibartfast : [talking about the mice]  In the field of management relations, they're absolutely shocking.

  Arthur : Oh, really?

  Slartibartfast : Yes, well, you see, every time they give me an order I just want to jump up on a table and scream!

  Arthur : Yes, I can see how that would be a problem.