- [Deputy Lupo admires her new car]
- Deputy Jo Lupo: Two hundred and sixty-five horsepower, track-two suspension and four-wheel drive. Totally high performance but completely under my control.
- Sheriff Jack Carter: Kind of like Zane.
- Douglas Fargo: Well, it was nice while it lasted but it's time to move on.
- Deputy Jo Lupo: So you just dumped her.
- Douglas Fargo: I don't believe in long good-byes, especially when something this sweet comes along.
- Deputy Jo Lupo: Men.
- Sheriff Jack Carter: Yeah, that's what the world needs is more people asleep at the wheel.
- Zoe Carter: Do you have to suck the fun out of everything?
- Sheriff Jack Carter: Well, I've met a lot of viruses but none of them that ever made me build jump towers in my sleep.
- Larry Haberman: Listen, about that hug...
- Douglas Fargo: Ooh! What happened in the trunk, stays in the trunk.
- Tess Fontana: Stakeouts are fun.
- Sheriff Jack Carter: They're... they're more fun with, um, pepperoni than with, uh, organic tofu, by the way.
- Allison Blake: I don't think that it's possible to build a working plasma generator out of aluminum Christmas trees and duct tape.
- Deputy Jo Lupo: Well, you seem okay to me.
- Douglas Fargo: What're you talking about? I am covered in evidence.