The Angry Video Game Nerd (TV Series)

An Angry Nerd Christmas Carol: Part 2 (2007)

James Rolfe: The Angry Video Game Nerd

Quotes 

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : It's Christmas! It's Christmas. What a glorious Christmas day. Look at all these games! I think I'll play Super Mario World. Fuck yeah, this game is awesome! In fact, I should just play good games from now on...

  [quickly grows angry and ejects the game] 

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : Man, fuck that.

  [grabs a Virtual Boy] 

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : let's play some shitty ones.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : Shaq Fu. Even the name makes people cringe, like you don't even wanna go there.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : The rotten core where this game stank bullshit stems from is its god forsaken control. The controls are mutilated. Fucking atrocious!

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : Just the fact that they can release a fighting game starring Shaquille O'Neal and call it Shaq Fu, pretty much proves that you can put 'fu' at the end of anything. How about 'Robin Williams Fu' or 'U2-Fu'. I mean, who came up with this shit? What, were they smoking crack up their ass?

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : [flips him off]  See this?

  Ghost of Christmas Past : I do see it.

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : [moves his hand around]  You're not looking at it.

  Ghost of Christmas Past : But I see it.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : Who are you?

  Ghost of Christmas Present : I'm the Ghost of Christmas Present, bitch.

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : What do you want?

  Ghost of Christmas Present : I just wanted to remind you of the fond memories you had with Super Nintendo. Remember Metroid, Zelda, Mario? You only choose to dwell on crap. You know what you're doing right now?

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : Talking to you?

  Ghost of Christmas Present : No, this is out of body, don't you get it? Right now, you're looking back at one of the worst games on the Super Nintendo.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : Look, Ghost, why come to me?

  Ghost of Christmas Past : To take you back to the past.

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : To play the shitty games that suck ass? No thanks.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : [as old man]  Remember the Nintendo Wii? Yeah, that's what they called it. But, it was very revolutionary when it first came out, but looking at it now, it's like a baby's toy.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : [playing "Shaq Fu"]  So, you're wandering around, fighting everybody you meet, including a goblin sort of thing, some crazy cat-bitch, a Persian prince, I guess, and all kinds of weird aliens and a mummy warrior. I never even heard of such a thing! I just don't know about this. It's really weird. I kind of liked "Full House: Tournament Fighter". At least that had more appropriate characters.

• Ghost of Christmas Past : Why do you doubt your senses, Nerd?

  The Angry Video Game Nerd : Because I wasn't ready to go completely insane tonight.

  Ghost of Christmas Past : But you're already there, drowning in your own misery and intolerance.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : [looking back on his childhood]  I remember nothing but torture.

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : I'd rather drink diarrhea sauce!

• The Angry Video Game Nerd : [as old man]  Now, I got this bullshit fuck game called Farcry Vengenace. Now, you put 'vengeance' at the end of anything, and it's sure to suck.