- Hank Hill: What the heck is a carbon offset?
- Dale Gribble: It's like a "get out of jail free" card for people concerned about the environment, but not concerned enough to actually do anything.
- Dale Gribble: How many carbon offsets can I put you down for?
- Hank Hill: You can put me down for kickin' your ass!
- Joseph Gribble: Stop digging if you hit metal. My dad says there are a lot of unexploded ordinances back there.