Men of a Certain Age (TV Series)

You Gonna Do That the Rest of Your Life? (2010)

Jon Manfrellotti: Manfro

Quotes 

• Manfro : How the hell'd you hit three in a row?

  Joe Tranelli : I mean, I got lucky there, but I'm, you know, I am a scratch, so...

  Manfro : Wait a minute. You really are a scratch golfer?

  Joe Tranelli : Yeah.

  Manfro : Well, this is bullshit, then!

  Joe Tranelli : What do you mean? I told you.

  Manfro : No, but if you're really a scratch, you got to say that. You got to say "Hey, before we bet, I'm really a scratch. No, *really*. I'm *really* a scratch"!

  Joe Tranelli : I said I'm a scratch.

  Manfro : Joe, if I said my dick was a foot long, would you really think it was a foot long?

  Joe Tranelli : Well, I-I-I would know that it's pretty big.

  Manfro : Not a foot long, Joe! If it was a foot long, I'd take it out and show you.

• Joe Tranelli : What the hell's going on?

  Manfro : Looks like we're about to win a thousand bucks off a pair of assholes.

  Joe Tranelli : Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Come on, I didn't agree to this.

  Manfro : Joe, we're just doing a little golfing, along with a little gambling. And from what I remember, you're a fan of both.

  Joe Tranelli : Yeah, this is a scam. You told them I'm a ten handicap. I don't want to do this.

  Manfro : Don't get all high and mighty. You scammed me pretty good the other day.

  Joe Tranelli : That wasn't a scam!

  Manfro : Who cares? I'm putting up the money. All you gotta do is hit the ball and look pretty. And by the way, if it helps, these assholes are pricks. Actual pricks. I ain't being funny. Took a bunch of my mom's IRA money, put it some hedge fund thing, now it's worth shit. Never apologized or anything. So they deserve it. Quit whining and let's put our balls in the air.

• Manfro : You're legit, Joe. You really could play serious golf.

  Joe Tranelli : Yeah, I know it looks that way, but it's like I told you...

  Manfro : No, no, no. If pressure's your bugaboo, you just kicked it.

  Joe Tranelli : I think I just kind of got pissed off.

  Manfro : That's how you deal with it. Whenever you're under pressure, picture two douchebags insulting an Asian guy.

• Manfro : Come on, you're almost 50, right? Get out there on that senior tour.

  Joe Tranelli : Naw.

  Manfro : Come on, Joe. You really want to be filling up balloons the rest of your life?

  Joe Tranelli : You know, it's funny that you mention that, 'cause... I've been thinking recently, uh... why this thing happened, and... did you ever see a dead person?

  Manfro : Where's this going?

  Joe Tranelli : No. No, I saw a dead lady. You know, and then I saw pictures of her when she was younger, and... I just started thinking, like, what'd she do with her life? You know, did she do everything she wanted to do? 'Cause life is short.

  Manfro : Yeah, it's touching, Joe. I don't know whether to cry or punch you.