The Simpsons (TV Series)

The Devil Wears Nada (2009)

Hank Azaria: Carl Carlson, Chinese Man, Julio, Cletus, Comic Book Guy, Superintendent Chalmers, Evil French Guy

Quotes 

• Carl Carlson : Homer, you've hardly had any meltdowns all week, so I'm making you executive assistant.

  Homer Simpson : Why can't I keep the job I have now, whatever it is?

  Carl Carlson : Easy now, big fella. Either be my assistant, or seek work elsewhere. And in this economy, elsewhere ain't hiring.

  Homer Simpson : Very well, I guess I'm at your beck.

  Carl Carlson : And call.

  Homer Simpson : Nooo!

  Carl Carlson : Yeah.

• Homer Simpson : Ye-bonjour!

  Carl Carlson : Homer, there's a moth in my room. Where are you?

  Homer Simpson : Where I should have been all along. In Springfield.

  Carl Carlson : What? You get back to the Eternal City of Lights, or you're fired.

  Homer Simpson : Oh, I don't think so. You know that woman you've been playing "hide the baguette" with? She's French first lady Carla Bruni. You fire me, and I'll call Nicolas Sarkozy, and he'll be all over you like Truffaut on Hitchcock.

  Carl Carlson : You wouldn't dare!

  Homer Simpson : Oh, wouldn't I? Just listen!

  [Dials other cell phone] 

  President Nicholas Sarkozy : [On phone]  Allo, you are getting cozy with Sarkozy.

  Carl Carlson : All right, Homer, you win. Give Marge my best.

  Homer Simpson : I will, but first, I'll be giving her mine.

• Evil French Guy : [Picking up phone Homer threw out]  Nuclear secrets, picture of Lenny... everything I need for my plan.

• Homer Simpson : See? He hasn't changed a bit.

  Carl Carlson : [On P.A]  Yes I have, in ways you are only beginning to suspect.

• Carla Bruni-Sarkozy : Monsieur Carlson, what has been your favorite thing about Paris?

  Carl Carlson : Oh, I really loved the...

  [Homer, reading a travel guide, whispers in his ear] 

  Carl Carlson : ...Louvre. Everything about it is so...

  [Homer whispers] 

  Carl Carlson : ...closed on Mondays.

• Photographer : Now, who's my next sexy historical lady?

  Marge Simpson : I am. The Tiger Woods of the 1930s, Babe Didrikson Zaharias.

  Photographer : Honey, I'm gonna need more "Babe" and less "Didrikson Zaharias".

  Marge Simpson : All right then, I'll take off one glove.