- Randy Marsh: The doctor made you a souvenir.
- Sharon Marsh: Oh Randy, I love it!
- Randy Marsh: And when it gets cold, it shrinks.
- Woman #1: Sharon, you got a scrotum coat?
- Sharon Marsh: Yep.
- Woman #1: Lucky!
- Dr. Doctor: [Looks at Randy's chart] Mr. Marsh, I'm afraid the tests came back positive, you do have testicular cancer.
- [Randy and Sharon have concerned looks as sad music begins to play]
- Randy Marsh: [excited] Score!
- [Sharon looks at him with annoyance]
- Dr. Doctor: Now, the good new is it hasn't spread anywhere. We should... probably schedule to have them re...
- Randy Marsh: [Interupting him] Yeah, yeah, yeah, but for now can I finally get my prescription please?
- Dr. Doctor: Your prescription for what?
- [Cut to Randy walking down the street to the medical marijuana store with his gigantic testicles in a wheelbarrow]
- Billy Miller: You get the chicken for me and I'll make sure you're hooked up for life. Do you wanna do it?
- Eric Cartman: Do I wanna do it? Does the Pope help pedophiles get away with their crimes?
- Eric Cartman: Is that something I'd want to do? Is the Pope Catholic? And making the world safe for pedophiles?
- Randy Marsh: Everywhere I go, when I walk by, chicks are like turning their heads and going "whaaa?" I never knew how much women love guys' balls until I got these puppies.
- Travis's wife: Travis, did you take out the garba-whaaa?
- Randy Marsh: See?
- Randy Marsh: Hey, my eyes are up here.
- Sharon Marsh: I'm sorry. I just...
- Randy Marsh: It's alright. I just want you to look at me when we make love and not just at my balls.
- Eric Cartman: Does a bear crap in the woods? And does the Pope crap on the broken lives and dreams of 200 deaf boys?