"Die Dienstagsfrauen" is a German television film from 2011, so this one will have its 10th anniversary next year. It runs for 1.5 hours approximately, slightly under, as they usually do and this film is the first from a trilogy (by now), and the most recent entry was from 2015, so probably not gonna be a fourth film, which is definitely a good thing. The director is Olaf Kreinsen and it is already a pretty pathetic movie but that a man directed this mess is even the negative icing on the cake. His body of work is self-explanatory though and makes it very obvious that you should not expect anything from this film here quality-wise. Only good thing to say about him is that he only returned for one of the sequels. The movie is based on a novel by Monika Peetz, who adapted her own screenplay for this film. Nothing positive to say either. Actually, you can usually say about the writer that they have a right to be angry when their original work is alright and the movie adaptation is bad, but her being in charge of the adaptation here makes it pretty obvious to me that the base material even sucked a lot and I don't even have to read it for that. Her body of work is as bad as the director's, just not too prolific, but garbage stays garbage no matter how big the amount may be. It may sound a bit harsh, but trust me: This film deserves all the negative criticism it gets. And there should always be more. Pretty ridiculous too the rating here is higher than five. I did not watch the films in chronological order, saw the third a few months ago, and now the firstg and second, but this really changes nothing.. You don't need to know what happened early on to understand the follow-ups. Actually, you won't. No matter which order you pick. But I shall focus on this first film now. The actresses are no nobodies here in Germany, all fairly experienced. And even if you may, even as a German film buff, not immediately recognize their names, the faces will be familiar. Not in a good way though. Just like those in charge behind the camera and as part of the crew, the actresses here have been in many, many terrible films. Speaking from experience here as I have seen some of those. Stuff you wanna stay away absolutely. So this movie is kinda a fitting addition to their bodies of work. More lack of quality and utter absence of range, versatility and talent. Instead, you get what you always get with Degeto productions: pseudo-important drama, shots at comedy that are absolutely unfunny and an over-the-top soundtrack that desperately tries to give any meaning to the more significant moments, but makes thinggs even worse. Oh yeah, Theaterkunst is also again part of this project. Still really ironic annthing related to this project has the (German term for the) word "art" included. Back to the cast, really tough to decide who is worst here. I think due to personal preference (or the exact opposite) I'd say that Hoger and Vester are the worst this time, although Kriener and Friedrich deserve German razzies equally. They all suck and if one is better than the other, then that is only the case because the other is plain terrible and the one is just terrible.
Now a few words on the plot and specific scenes that sucked the most. Early on, it needs to be said that this is a film directed almost exclusively at female audiences. As a consequence, it is extremely anti-male and not just in a way that there are no well-written male characters (actually there are no well-written female characters either, but at least they tried, with the males they were just lackluster and did not put in any effort), but that everything about males here is extremely sexist and discriminatory. Women are getting away with it though. So much for equality. I applaud every female in the audience that sees through this mess. So yeah, without elaborating on any female specifically, it can be said that it does not take long at all until pretty much each and every single one of them has a male suitor, all of them much more attractive (one even like 30 years younger, yeah right) than the females in this apparently very alternate reality. And still, of course the women are always in charge of denying the guys because apparently they are good catches. Letg me assure you they are not. And this does not only refer to their llooks, which would still be forgivable, but also to their really shallow characters. Just take one example when make-up scarecrow starts rambling about how a French bus driver got rid of his pants in what was a language barrier or something. We only hear about that from narration. Probably all lies anyway. As for Vester's character, she is one not too fond of doing this Camino de Santiago journey, but all of a sudden in the end has her moment when she realizes she needs to quit her family for a while and go on with the journey. Very realistic, especially after ending up in a car with a handsome stranger before that while the others are walking. And the one who at least seems likable for a while and initiates the journey turns out that she has cheated on her husband for quite a while. And not only that, but with the partner of a somebody else from the gang. But hey, she wanted to tell her, wanted to apologize etc. she is not a bad girl. Her gender makes her good. So they quickly move on to the guy she cheated with and that he not only had two partners, but three. Alrightey. Original status established again that men are the only pigs. By the way the actress' acting in this scene (I think it's Friedrich) when she is furious, but still not telling her friend who she slept with, is among the worst you will see in this film. Still, the seccret comes to light eventually, actually faster then expected and well, what can you say. They are still all happy and together in the end already despute something that would realistically ruin 95% of friendships in real life. It's okay as long as women do it. But it's not just the key stories that suck here, also individual quotes and how they were written, those that were supposed to get in some comedy, but it's all cringe. One of the characters is a judge or something and she makes a pretty bizarre parallel about people going on the Camino de Santiago while they are walking. This was especially pathetic because it was intended to have some metaphorical meaning too, but yeah it all went wrong. Or that the diary entries were apparently all fake. It is just so much nonsense here from beginning to end, you could easily write another three parahgraphs about this mess and eventually reach the character limit. However, I'd rather forget about alll this as quickly as possible. So I shall stop now, but not without saying that I am not sure what is more embarrassing: that this is still on national television almost ten years after its original release (your GEZ money at work, stay dumb) or that apparently enough people liked this film for not one, but two sequels being made. Finally, to summarize what is wrong with this film in one sentence, it can be said that they went for depth, meaning, comedy, significance, but did not have 10% (probably not even 1%) of the talent needed to make it work, both in front of as well as behind the camera. Highly, highly not recommended.
Now a few words on the plot and specific scenes that sucked the most. Early on, it needs to be said that this is a film directed almost exclusively at female audiences. As a consequence, it is extremely anti-male and not just in a way that there are no well-written male characters (actually there are no well-written female characters either, but at least they tried, with the males they were just lackluster and did not put in any effort), but that everything about males here is extremely sexist and discriminatory. Women are getting away with it though. So much for equality. I applaud every female in the audience that sees through this mess. So yeah, without elaborating on any female specifically, it can be said that it does not take long at all until pretty much each and every single one of them has a male suitor, all of them much more attractive (one even like 30 years younger, yeah right) than the females in this apparently very alternate reality. And still, of course the women are always in charge of denying the guys because apparently they are good catches. Letg me assure you they are not. And this does not only refer to their llooks, which would still be forgivable, but also to their really shallow characters. Just take one example when make-up scarecrow starts rambling about how a French bus driver got rid of his pants in what was a language barrier or something. We only hear about that from narration. Probably all lies anyway. As for Vester's character, she is one not too fond of doing this Camino de Santiago journey, but all of a sudden in the end has her moment when she realizes she needs to quit her family for a while and go on with the journey. Very realistic, especially after ending up in a car with a handsome stranger before that while the others are walking. And the one who at least seems likable for a while and initiates the journey turns out that she has cheated on her husband for quite a while. And not only that, but with the partner of a somebody else from the gang. But hey, she wanted to tell her, wanted to apologize etc. she is not a bad girl. Her gender makes her good. So they quickly move on to the guy she cheated with and that he not only had two partners, but three. Alrightey. Original status established again that men are the only pigs. By the way the actress' acting in this scene (I think it's Friedrich) when she is furious, but still not telling her friend who she slept with, is among the worst you will see in this film. Still, the seccret comes to light eventually, actually faster then expected and well, what can you say. They are still all happy and together in the end already despute something that would realistically ruin 95% of friendships in real life. It's okay as long as women do it. But it's not just the key stories that suck here, also individual quotes and how they were written, those that were supposed to get in some comedy, but it's all cringe. One of the characters is a judge or something and she makes a pretty bizarre parallel about people going on the Camino de Santiago while they are walking. This was especially pathetic because it was intended to have some metaphorical meaning too, but yeah it all went wrong. Or that the diary entries were apparently all fake. It is just so much nonsense here from beginning to end, you could easily write another three parahgraphs about this mess and eventually reach the character limit. However, I'd rather forget about alll this as quickly as possible. So I shall stop now, but not without saying that I am not sure what is more embarrassing: that this is still on national television almost ten years after its original release (your GEZ money at work, stay dumb) or that apparently enough people liked this film for not one, but two sequels being made. Finally, to summarize what is wrong with this film in one sentence, it can be said that they went for depth, meaning, comedy, significance, but did not have 10% (probably not even 1%) of the talent needed to make it work, both in front of as well as behind the camera. Highly, highly not recommended.
