- Linda: [after seeing the Duncan family embarrass themselves on TV] But Teddy, you're nothing like those people. You're poised and sophisticated and...
- Teddy Duncan: [Burps loudly]
- Amy Duncan: [after seeing a funny video of Charlie] PJ, you're gonna have to put that online so grandma can see it.
- PJ Duncan: Grandma knows how to go online?
- Amy Duncan: PJ, you're gonna have to put that on a DVD so grandma can watch it.
- PJ Duncan: Grandma got a DVD player?
- Amy Duncan: OK, PJ, you're just gonna have to go over to grandma's house and act it out for her.
- PJ Duncan: [Reading comments about Charlie's video] Here's another one. "You're a pathetic, no-talent loser" with about 19 exclamation points. It was from Gabe D.
- Gabe Duncan: [pauses and gives a look]
- PJ Duncan: [Still unaware it was Gabe] Who are these people?
- Gabe Duncan: There's no way to know.
- Amy Duncan: Gabe, honey, come here. I want to show you something very exciting from mommy's past.
- Gabe Duncan: Teddy told me if I ever heard those words, I should just keep walking.
- Bob Duncan: You can't go over there tomorrow night. The Channel 8 news crew is coming over. They're gonna interview the whole family.
- Teddy Duncan: Yeah, I think I'll pass
- Amy Duncan: What? You don't wanna be on TV with me?
- Bob Duncan, PJ Duncan, Gabe Duncan: US!
- Amy Duncan: Us?
- Gabe Duncan: [about her fake tan] Hey, mom. You got something on your face.
- Amy Duncan: Oh, where?
- Gabe Duncan: Everywhere!
- PJ Duncan: Hey, you guys wanna see something funny?
- Teddy Duncan: If this is where you lift your shirt up and make your belly button sing, no thank you.
- Amy Duncan: Ooh, what are you having?
- Teddy Duncan: Toast points with salmon and dill.
- Bob Duncan: Toast points? I say, what's the points?
- Paul: Speaking of families, Teddy, when are we gonna get to meet yours?
- Teddy Duncan: Um... well, they're kind of busy, so maybe next summer. Or the one after that.