Game of Thrones (TV Series)

The Wolf and the Lion (2011)

Aidan Gillen: Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish

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Quotes 

• [Varys sneaks up on Littlefinger in the throne room] 

  Lord Varys : The first to arrive and the last to leave. I admire your industry.

  Petyr Baelish : You do move quietly.

  Lord Varys : We all have our qualities.

  Petyr Baelish : You look a bit lonely today. You should pay a visit to my brothel this evening. First boy is on the house.

  Lord Varys : I think you are mistaking business with pleasure.

  Petyr Baelish : Am I? All those birds that whisper in your ear, such pretty little things. Trust me... we accommodate all inclinations.

  Lord Varys : Oh, I'm sure. Lord Redwyne likes his boys very young, I hear.

  Petyr Baelish : I'm a purveyor of beauty and discretion, both equally important.

  Lord Varys : Though I suppose beauty is a subjective quality, no? Is it true that Ser Marlon of Tumblestone prefers amputees?

  Petyr Baelish : All desires are valid to a man with a full purse.

  Lord Varys : And I heard the most awful rumor about a certain lord with a taste for fresh cadavers. Must be enormously difficult to accommodate that inclination. The logistics alone... to find beautiful corpses before they rot.

  Petyr Baelish : Strictly speaking, such a thing would not be in accordance with the king's laws.

  Lord Varys : Strictly speaking.

  Petyr Baelish : Tell me... does someone somewhere keep your balls in a little box? I've often wondered.

  Lord Varys : Do you know I have no idea where they are? And we had been so close. But enough about me, how have you been since we last saw each other?

  Petyr Baelish : Since you last saw me or since I last saw you?

  Lord Varys : Now, the last time I saw you, you were talking to the Hand of the King.

  Petyr Baelish : Saw me with your own eyes?

  Lord Varys : Eyes I own.

  Petyr Baelish : Council business. We all have so much to discuss with Ned Stark.

  Lord Varys : Everyone's well aware of your enduring... fondness for Lord Stark's wife. If the Lannisters were behind the attempt on the Stark boy's life, and it was discovered that you helped the Starks come to that conclusion... to think... a simple word to the queen...

  Petyr Baelish : One shudders at the thought.

  [Varys shudders mockingly] 

  Petyr Baelish : But you know something, I do believe I have seen you even more recently than you have seen me.

  Lord Varys : Have you?

  Petyr Baelish : Yes. Earlier today, I distinctly recall you talking to Lord Stark in his chambers.

  Lord Varys : [scoffing]  Was that you under the bed?

  Petyr Baelish : And not long after that, when I saw you escorting a certain... foreign dignitary... council business? Of course, you would have friends from across the narrow sea. You're from there yourself. After all, we're friends, aren't we, Lord Varys? I'd like to think we are. So you can imagine my burden, wondering if the king might question my friend's sympathies, to stand at a crossroads where turning left means loyalty to a friend, turning right, loyalty to the realm...

  Lord Varys : Oh, please.

  Petyr Baelish : ...to find myself in a position where a simple word to the king...

  [Renly walks in] 

  Renly Baratheon : What are you two conspiring about? Well, whatever it is, you'd best hurry up. My brother is coming.

  Petyr Baelish : To a small council meeting?

  Lord Varys : Disturbing news from far away. Hadn't you heard?

• [at the small council meeting about Daenerys Targeryen] 

  Robert Baratheon : The whore is pregnant.

  Eddard Stark : You're speaking of murdering a child.

  Robert Baratheon : I warned you this would happen, back in the North. I warned you, but you didn't care to hear. Well, hear it now: I want them dead. Mother and child both, and that fool Viserys as well. Is that plain enough for you? I want them both dead!

  Eddard Stark : [quietly]  You'll dishonor yourself forever if you do this.

  Robert Baratheon : [raises his voice]  Honor? I've got Seven Kingdoms to rule! One king, Seven Kingdoms! Do you think honor keeps them in line? Do you think it's honor that's keeping the peace? It's fear! Fear and blood!

  Eddard Stark : Then we're no better than the Mad King!

  Robert Baratheon : Careful, Ned, careful now!

  Eddard Stark : You want to assassinate a girl because the Spider heard a rumor?

  Lord Varys : No rumor, my lord, the princess is with child.

  Eddard Stark : Based on whose information?

  Lord Varys : Ser Jorah Mormont. He is serving as advisor to the Targaryens.

  Eddard Stark : Mormont? You bring us the whispers of a traitor half a world away and call it fact.

  Petyr Baelish : Jorah Mormont's a slaver, not a traitor. Small difference, I know, to an honorable man.

  Eddard Stark : He broke the law, betrayed his family, fled our land. We commit murder on the word of this man?

  Robert Baratheon : And if he's right? If she has a son, a Targaryen at the head of a Dothraki army? What then?

  Eddard Stark : The narrow sea still lies between us. I'll fear the Dothraki the day they teach their horses to run on water.

  Robert Baratheon : Do nothing. That's your wise advice? Do nothing 'til our enemies are on our shores?

  [Robert looks around angirly at the other council members] 

  Robert Baratheon : You're my council: counsel! Speak sense to this honorable fool!

  Lord Varys : I understand your misgivings, my lord. Truly, I do. It is a terrible thing we must consider, a vile thing. Yet we who presume to rule must sometimes do vile things for the good of the realm. Should the gods grant Daenerys a son, the realm will bleed.

  Grand Maester Pycelle : I bear this girl no ill will, how many innocents will die? How many towns will burn? Is it not wiser, kinder even, that she should die now so that tens of thousands might live?

  Renly Baratheon : We should've had them both killed years ago.

  Petyr Baelish : When you find yourself in bed with an ugly woman, best close your eyes, get it over with. Cut her throat. Be done with it.

  Eddard Stark : [walks right up to Robert]  I followed you into war. Twice. Without doubts, without second thoughts. But I will not follow you now. The Robert I grew up with didn't tremble at the shadow of an unborn child.

  Robert Baratheon : She dies.

  Eddard Stark : I will have no part in it.

  Robert Baratheon : You're the King's Hand, Lord Stark. You'll do as I command, or I'll find me a Hand who will.

  [Ned takes off his badge of office and tosses it onto the table in front of Robert] 

  Eddard Stark : And good luck to him. I thought you were a better man.

  Robert Baratheon : Out. Out, damn you, I'm done with you!

  [Ned turns and walks out] 

  Robert Baratheon : Go, run back to Winterfell! I'll have your head on a spike!

  [Ned walks through the throne room as Robert's shouts trail after him] 

  Robert Baratheon : I'll find her myself, you fool! You think you're too good for this? Too proud and honorable? This is a war!

• [Renly and Littlefinger speak about the bet against Loras Tyrell] 

  Renly Baratheon : A pity you lost the bet. It would've been so nice for you to have a friend.

  Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish : And when will you be having *your* friend?

• Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish : Loras knew his mare was in heat. Quite crafty, really.

  Sansa Stark : Ser Loras would never do that. There is no honor in tricks.

  Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish : No honor, but quite a bit of gold.

• [Eddard and Jory exit the brothel. Lannister guardsmen appear, armed with pikes, blocking the street. Jaime gallops in on his white horse] 

  Jaime Lannister : Such a small pack of wolves...

  [Jaime dismounts] 

  Jory Cassel : Stay back, Ser. This is the Hand of the King!

  Jaime Lannister : [mockingly]  WAS the Hand of the King. I'm not sure what he is. Lord of somewhere very far away.

  Petyr Baelish : [steps out of the brothel]  What's the meaning of this, Lannister?

  Jaime Lannister : [to Littlefinger]  Get back inside, where it's safe.

  Jaime Lannister : [to Ned]  I'm looking for my brother. You remember my brother, don't you, Ned Stark? Blond hair, sharp tongue, short man.

  Eddard Stark : I remember him well.

  Jaime Lannister : Seems he had some trouble on the road. You wouldn't know what happened to him, would you?

  Eddard Stark : He was taken at my command, to answer for his crimes.

  [Jaime draws his sword. His guardsmen ready their spears. Jory draws his sword. Littlefinger steps forward] 

  Petyr Baelish : My lords...

  [Ned halts Littlefinger] 

  Petyr Baelish : [to Ned]  I'll bring the City Watch.

  [Littlefinger retreats into the brothel] 

  Jaime Lannister : Come, Stark. I'd rather you die sword in hand.

  Jory Cassel : If you threaten my lord again...

  Jaime Lannister : Threaten? As in, I'm going to open your lord from balls to brains and see what Starks are made of?

  Eddard Stark : You kill me - your brother is a dead man.

  Jaime Lannister : [smiles nastily]  You're right.

  Jaime Lannister : [to his soldiers]  Take him alive. Kill his men.

  [two of the Lannister spearmen throw their pikes at Wyl and Heward, killing them instantly. Ned draws his sword. He and Jory engage in fight with the Lannister guardsmen, killing some of them. Jory fights with Jaime. Jaime blocks Jory's sword, then draws a dagger with his left hand and drives it through Jory's left eye. Jory falls dead. Ned is shocked. Jaime smiles mockingly and steps toward Ned. They fight, while the Lannister spearmen circle them. Suddenly, one of the spearmen who stands behind Ned thrusts his spear through Ned's right thigh. Ned yells in agony and falls to his knee, unable to fight. Jaime is enraged at that intervention, and knocks the spearman down. Rather than taking advantage of Ned's injury, Jaime walks away. One of Jaime's guardsmen brings his horse. Jaime mounts it] 

  Jaime Lannister : My brother, lord Stark! I want him back!

  [Jaime and his surviving guardsmen leave. Ned slumps into unconsciousness] 

• Petyr Baelish : Brothels make a much better investment than ships, I've found. Whores rarely sink.