- Karen O'Hara: Who gets haunted by a leprechaun? What is that? It's the stupidest thing I've ever heard of and it's happening to me. It's like I'm trapped in some bad monster movie and I can't get out. And to top it off, this thing is probably going to kill me anyway.
- Dax Spence: Hey, it's not going to kill you. If this was a bad monster movie, it would kill everybody but you.
- Karen O'Hara: Small consolation.
- Dax Spence: You know, when somebody gets you down, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 2 muscles if you reach out and pimp slap 'em.
- Karen O'Hara: Are you suggesting that I pimp slap the leprechaun?
- Dax Spence: Yes. Yes, I am.
- [last lines]
- Sheriff Conor O'Hara: If anyone should be dead it should be me you might as well kill me now...
- [leprechaun obliges by bisecting him from the waist]