- Professor T: [Professor T to his students upon discovering that none of them reads the local paper...] You are a generation obsessed with the narcissistic posturing and mindless witterings of attention junkies from the far-flung reaches of the planet. Yet, with your snouts buried deep in the sulfurous trough of social media, you've failed to notice the multitudes that land daily on your own doorsteps.
- [Jasper is supposed to be looking after his mother's dog. Jasper is sitting in his office, engossed in reading something. The dog is nowhere to be seen]
- Ingrid Snares: Where's the dog?
- [Jasper looks blankly at her]
- Ingrid Snares: The dog. You know? So high. Unfortunate disposition. Looks like a cross between a slipper and a gerbil.