This was one bad movie ! . You can guess what your getting before you start this one up. As a fan of b-budget horror and sci-fi,i HAD to see this movie.Last year brought us Sharktapus,and a few other sci-fi creatures,and this year,it gets BETTER !.A two headed shark !.With loads of bad effects,bad acting,and some good ,ol fashion shoddy monster. The film is chocked full of mistakes,and poor film-making stuff,and stranger things,that you cant stop watching.I loved the way the shark was anywhere from 20 foot ,to 9 foot,depending on the shots needs.Bless the people that worked on this fartblower,and bless US,the viewers that keep watching these movies.
91 Reviews
The horror...that a movie this bad can be made.
Latentlove200020 January 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Okay, let me just put this out there; I gave it 2/10 because it made me laugh. Now, lets look at why it made me laugh.
The simple fact of in the beginning of the movie a 2-headed shark jumps out of the water and kills the only two remotely interesting characters in the entire film by swallowing them whole.
Definition of remotely interesting: two chicks in bikinis who know how to rock the waves on wave-boards while being towed by a speedboat. They aren't the kind of girls you would never see doing this and to be honest it is pretty sweet the stunts they pull off. These are the kind of girls you want to sit down and talk to. You want to ask them what got them into the sport, how long they have been doing it, can you teach me how? Those kind of girls. So, in the start of the film the stage is set with three guys recording these two chicks who you want to get to know.
SORRY, but they don't even get the chance to talk, they just die. Now, they can be swallowed whole by the shark but for some reason the shark can't swallow the three guys who were in the boat whole. That makes a lot of sense right? More or less, after the two chicks on wave-boards die the movie becomes boring and full of laughs. You will laugh only to entertain yourself as you question why you have continued to watch the movie another second.
The female characters that replace the two wave-boarders make your brain melt as they are hardly interested in being athletic, obviously fun to hang out with, and having the IQ to realize doing something besides screaming is a good idea. All they do is pop their tits out into the camera and smile...or scream...or rid you of their existence.
The simple fact of in the beginning of the movie a 2-headed shark jumps out of the water and kills the only two remotely interesting characters in the entire film by swallowing them whole.
Definition of remotely interesting: two chicks in bikinis who know how to rock the waves on wave-boards while being towed by a speedboat. They aren't the kind of girls you would never see doing this and to be honest it is pretty sweet the stunts they pull off. These are the kind of girls you want to sit down and talk to. You want to ask them what got them into the sport, how long they have been doing it, can you teach me how? Those kind of girls. So, in the start of the film the stage is set with three guys recording these two chicks who you want to get to know.
SORRY, but they don't even get the chance to talk, they just die. Now, they can be swallowed whole by the shark but for some reason the shark can't swallow the three guys who were in the boat whole. That makes a lot of sense right? More or less, after the two chicks on wave-boards die the movie becomes boring and full of laughs. You will laugh only to entertain yourself as you question why you have continued to watch the movie another second.
The female characters that replace the two wave-boarders make your brain melt as they are hardly interested in being athletic, obviously fun to hang out with, and having the IQ to realize doing something besides screaming is a good idea. All they do is pop their tits out into the camera and smile...or scream...or rid you of their existence.
Absolutely horrible. Give yourself a break and gouge your eyes out.
jackmeat8 July 2013
Movie review:After posting the trailer, I just couldn't wait to watch this one. This movie was so bad, it kept my attention in between sessions of gargling hydrochloric acid to null out the pain my brain was enduring. The plot, bunch of kids charter a boat to who knows where and comes under attack, from a 2 headed shark, hence the snappy title. This movie is possibly the biggest joke I have seen, ever. The un-special effects were done by a two year old taking her first bath with a toy rubber shark. At some points the people that were eaten were larger than the shark, and others the shark was larger than the boat. The camera work was done so poorly that this was obvious. The shark had the ability to devour people that are standing in waist deep water, yet plunge straight downward into the depths of the water. When the actors, and that is the biggest insult to acting I have ever witnessed, get stranded on an atoll (i always thought that was a coral reef formation, not a makeshift island) they must figure out a way to escape. blah blah. There is not one single redeeming quality of this piece of crap, and it is hard not to swear as I am typing this. Oh, did I mention Brooke Hogan and Carmen Electra are the main attractions? They are still stuck in a cardboard box attempting to act their way out of it. All the extras were following cues from the staff so blatantly it was pathetic. "Act scared", "Act mortified at the person being eaten underwater", even though there is no way you could see it. I could go on, but I'll spare you. Do not see this movie unless you feel the need to watch a "how to not make a movie" instructional video. Worst movie ever. Now I am sure there are the "b-movies so bad they are good" people out there. Well, this is it, minus the good. Recycled scenes in a 87 minute movie, boats not moving when they are supposed to be speeding, conversations of two people on said boats and they can hear each other, the list is endless. 1.5/10 IMDb 2.6 , I guess it got scored high because two topless chicks make out in said waste deep water and get eaten. Brooke, stick with TNA (that is wrestling for the non-followers). At least that is more believable.
Sharks Vs. Silicone
chow91319 April 2012
Sharks Vs. Silicone The 'Jaws' series tought us that sharks grow to 40 feet, eat helicopters, raise their heads above the water to roar at their prey, hunt in 4 feet of water, and attack cruise ships.
The recent megalodon films tought us that sharks grow to 65 feet, fly, eat 747 airplanes, and attack oil rigs, supertankers, and aircraft carriers. Yet still hunt teenagers in 4 feet of water and raise their heads above the water to roar.
Now '2 Headed Shark Attack' teaches us, sharks have two heads, grow to 65 feet yet still hunt teenagers in 4 feet of water, can collapse and island by butting against it, are amphibious and come on land to roar at teenagers, and most importantly have a sweet tooth for silicon.
The plot: Hardly original crew of token "marine biology" college students' cruise ship is struck by engine and radio failure.
With Carmen Electra as a college professor it's understandable why so many gorgeous, horny, and brain dead students signed up for the class.
And when I say there's a lot of silicone, I mean it. I counted only 4 breasts that could even pass for natural in the entire film.
Predictably the class wades ashore a "atoll" which according to this film tend to collapse. Atolls apparently also feature concrete docks for motor boats and Robinson Caruso like grass huts.
The dialogue consists entirely of, "What was that? Oh my God! Go go go!" There's plenty of blood and guts and some decent CGI FX.
Disappointingly there's no explanation for why a shark has 2 heads and is 60 feet long. Most giant shark movies at least offer some type of explanation such as a greedy corporation's experiment gone awry.
The silicone is nice to look at between killings but no one is memorably gorgeous enough to save this disaster.
The recent megalodon films tought us that sharks grow to 65 feet, fly, eat 747 airplanes, and attack oil rigs, supertankers, and aircraft carriers. Yet still hunt teenagers in 4 feet of water and raise their heads above the water to roar.
Now '2 Headed Shark Attack' teaches us, sharks have two heads, grow to 65 feet yet still hunt teenagers in 4 feet of water, can collapse and island by butting against it, are amphibious and come on land to roar at teenagers, and most importantly have a sweet tooth for silicon.
The plot: Hardly original crew of token "marine biology" college students' cruise ship is struck by engine and radio failure.
With Carmen Electra as a college professor it's understandable why so many gorgeous, horny, and brain dead students signed up for the class.
And when I say there's a lot of silicone, I mean it. I counted only 4 breasts that could even pass for natural in the entire film.
Predictably the class wades ashore a "atoll" which according to this film tend to collapse. Atolls apparently also feature concrete docks for motor boats and Robinson Caruso like grass huts.
The dialogue consists entirely of, "What was that? Oh my God! Go go go!" There's plenty of blood and guts and some decent CGI FX.
Disappointingly there's no explanation for why a shark has 2 heads and is 60 feet long. Most giant shark movies at least offer some type of explanation such as a greedy corporation's experiment gone awry.
The silicone is nice to look at between killings but no one is memorably gorgeous enough to save this disaster.
Had to watch it.... Needed a good laugh.
DanicaFontaine8 September 2012
And let me tell you.... I busted a gut on this one. I mean I expected bad, but there really isn't a word that adequately describes the level of bad this movie broached upon. Like Ninth circle of hell bad. Like Killer Clowns from Outer Space was an Oscar Winner bad. Like .... never mind. I need another good laugh, so I have Sand shark next on my DVR to laugh through. Whoever wrote this film should be drawn and quartered and forced to sign an agreement that swears they will never write again. B rated? Thats a compliment undeserved. Who in their right mind paid to produce that film? Is there a way to negotiate your contract to NOT include this in your credits list? I know if it were me, I'd certainly explore that option.
Physically painful to watch
golfpunk11121 February 2012
Honestly what are these other clowns on? 6 and 7 stars? This movie is one of if not the worst I have watched.
Terrible story line, woeful cgi, my ass could of acted scenes better and so many mistakes.
They should start paying people to watch this. If this was my movie and I had just watched the final cut, I would have slit my wrists, gouged my eyes out and then destroyed all evidence that the movie ever existed while I waited to bleed out.
I thought this movie may be so bad it would be funny, I was wrong it is just really, really bad.
I want the last hour and a half of my life back.
Terrible story line, woeful cgi, my ass could of acted scenes better and so many mistakes.
They should start paying people to watch this. If this was my movie and I had just watched the final cut, I would have slit my wrists, gouged my eyes out and then destroyed all evidence that the movie ever existed while I waited to bleed out.
I thought this movie may be so bad it would be funny, I was wrong it is just really, really bad.
I want the last hour and a half of my life back.
Oh My!
joseph_kerollos7 May 2012
Warning: Spoilers
You know when you first watched Jaws, how long it took you to get back into water? Now after watching this movie, I don't know how long it will take me to be able to watch another one!
It's not just the creature didn't exist in History but the acting was bad, actors were not even attractive, scenario, casting, graphics, synopsis, direction,... etc! I really don't know where to start! I want to warn everyone.. if you are going to watch it... "DO NOT WATCH IT"
Now to answer golfpunk's question about who would give this movie a great review, simply the actors and the director!
I wish there was a lower grade than 1 to give you guys but there ain't!
short messages: 1- actors; please stop acting 2- Director; you should change career... do anything else! 3- Writers; How? Just how you have had the courage to write something that bad?! 4- Graphics guys; I used to do these graphics 15 years ago on a 486 machine with 3D under DOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is another millennium if you know what I mean!
I feel abused after watching this movie!
It's not just the creature didn't exist in History but the acting was bad, actors were not even attractive, scenario, casting, graphics, synopsis, direction,... etc! I really don't know where to start! I want to warn everyone.. if you are going to watch it... "DO NOT WATCH IT"
Now to answer golfpunk's question about who would give this movie a great review, simply the actors and the director!
I wish there was a lower grade than 1 to give you guys but there ain't!
short messages: 1- actors; please stop acting 2- Director; you should change career... do anything else! 3- Writers; How? Just how you have had the courage to write something that bad?! 4- Graphics guys; I used to do these graphics 15 years ago on a 486 machine with 3D under DOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is another millennium if you know what I mean!
I feel abused after watching this movie!
If it had three heads, then maybe...
dave_last-edition8 February 2012
A wild 2 headed Sharpedo appeared. It used pixelate. It's not very effective ...
Suddenly, after about one minute, a vicious two-headed shark shows its teeth and consumes two innocent babes as if they were his hors d'oeuvre. Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourself for 90 minutes of the most preposterous nonsense ever recorded on film.
In fact there is not even much to say about total failure number twenty thousand of 'The Asylum'. Really stiff dialogues, lousy acting, miserable directing, hopeless CGI, SFX and the typical, but equally desperate storyline. However, this time there are no scientists or special agents involved. The shark is only confronted with a boat of voluptuous and muscular students, who, of course, parade happily with their breasts and biceps, but ultimately only let the vocal cords work.
It can be said that the shark is essentially a young, healthy man, with an immaculate interest in the female sex, even though he presents himself at times as a juvenile peeper. But, generally it doesn't take long before he comes trotting with a whopper of an opening line, and starts courting the giggling girls. A lasting relationship, however, is not an option.
We know by now that our friends from 'The Asylum' aren't very pragmatic in approach, but of all the plot holes there is only one that I can not fathom. If that shark has two heads, then why didn't Carmen Electra have four breasts? Food for thought.
Suddenly, after about one minute, a vicious two-headed shark shows its teeth and consumes two innocent babes as if they were his hors d'oeuvre. Ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourself for 90 minutes of the most preposterous nonsense ever recorded on film.
In fact there is not even much to say about total failure number twenty thousand of 'The Asylum'. Really stiff dialogues, lousy acting, miserable directing, hopeless CGI, SFX and the typical, but equally desperate storyline. However, this time there are no scientists or special agents involved. The shark is only confronted with a boat of voluptuous and muscular students, who, of course, parade happily with their breasts and biceps, but ultimately only let the vocal cords work.
It can be said that the shark is essentially a young, healthy man, with an immaculate interest in the female sex, even though he presents himself at times as a juvenile peeper. But, generally it doesn't take long before he comes trotting with a whopper of an opening line, and starts courting the giggling girls. A lasting relationship, however, is not an option.
We know by now that our friends from 'The Asylum' aren't very pragmatic in approach, but of all the plot holes there is only one that I can not fathom. If that shark has two heads, then why didn't Carmen Electra have four breasts? Food for thought.
~sigh~
coomassieblue10 February 2012
I'm curious as to who bank rolls movies like this? I get it, its not suppose to be a 'serious' movie; really the name of the movie says it all, however.... you've got to make the storyline at least a bit believable or at least entertaining. This movie fits in the same class as Piranha 3D and Shark Night. However i'd rather watch either of those over again before watching this movie. The acting is terrible, and if this is the platform Brooke Hogan plans on launching her acting career... I suggest she slap on some spandex and hop in the WWE ring instead. And what about poor Carmen Electra? Clearly she's needing some cash or at the least some exposure in front of the camera because her suntan scene (no nudity) was ridiculous...
I wish the formerly known as the SFC would go out of business.
mhorg20188 September 2012
When I watch a total crapfest like this, it makes me wonder how the brilliant Battlestar Galactica ever aired, especially on this Lowest Common Denominator channel. Anyone else remember when this was a GOOD channel? When they showed 50's classic, SF Pilot Playhouse, etc? Now it pummels the audience with garbage like this, filled with has beens and never were's, edits out the softcore nudity and sex (for the DVD's and Europe I imagine). Anyone remember when a B movie was worth seeing? This absolute turd sandwich of a movie featured horrible effects, worse acting and a dumb story that had really nothing going for it. I know, I know, I didn't have to watch it. I know that. But it's like being hypnotized. One wants to look away, but we can't. WE CAN'T. I'd say this, avoid at all costs, unless you want to save money on a sleeping pill. It's simply that horrible.
Greatest Movie Ever Made.
reggiebottomtooth12318 April 2012
Warning: Spoilers
Wow. no words can describe how powerful a film this is. Carmen Electra as a doctor? Pure genius. I was so convinced of her acting, I actually looked up her to see when she got her doctorate. Turns out, she isn't a real doctor, which I find hard to believe, because of how expertly she bandaged that guys leg that one time.
I did not expect the black guy, the arrogant jock, and the skinny dippers to die. That came out of nowhere.
Now onto the plot. I was taken by surprise when their boat was damaged. I started thinking: what if the two-headed shark showed up? sure enough, it did. I started worrying that they would all die, when suddenly they find an island to get to. I kept thinking the movie would be short, and that they would just stay on the island, but like a gift from god, the experienced screenwriters thought to have the island sink! wow. I was stunned. By now your probably thinking, how can this movie get any greater? Well, the main protagonist chi You may think a two headed shark wouldn't be very streamlined. well, you're wrong. Its plenty fast, and who knew twice the heads would mean twice the teeth? I sure didn't think of that, until one of the cast mentioned it in the movie. i was like "aw damn, shes right! this thing is twice as scary a jaws!"But luckily, this also makes it twice the movie! did not regret finding this on netflix. This is going on my shelf right next to Shawshank Redemption and Schindler's List.
I did not expect the black guy, the arrogant jock, and the skinny dippers to die. That came out of nowhere.
Now onto the plot. I was taken by surprise when their boat was damaged. I started thinking: what if the two-headed shark showed up? sure enough, it did. I started worrying that they would all die, when suddenly they find an island to get to. I kept thinking the movie would be short, and that they would just stay on the island, but like a gift from god, the experienced screenwriters thought to have the island sink! wow. I was stunned. By now your probably thinking, how can this movie get any greater? Well, the main protagonist chi You may think a two headed shark wouldn't be very streamlined. well, you're wrong. Its plenty fast, and who knew twice the heads would mean twice the teeth? I sure didn't think of that, until one of the cast mentioned it in the movie. i was like "aw damn, shes right! this thing is twice as scary a jaws!"But luckily, this also makes it twice the movie! did not regret finding this on netflix. This is going on my shelf right next to Shawshank Redemption and Schindler's List.
Dialogue Example: "Wait, if it has two heads then it must have double the teeth!"
Michael_Elliott6 April 2012
2-Headed Shark Attack (2012)
** (out of 4)
If you're expecting something like JAWS then I really hope you don't rent or buy a movie called 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK. This film from the one and only The Asylum has a group of kids going out to do research when their boat is attacked by the title creature. Soon many are eaten while others stand around with dumb looks on their faces but have no fear because Carmen Electra, Charlie O'Connell and Brooke Hogan are on hand. 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK is a very, very bad movie but once you realize that this is a straight-to-DVD flick from The Asylum then you realize that it shouldn't be taken serious and it's okay to laugh at it. Those old enough will probably remember in the 80s when low-budget movies like this one would attract used up, former stars and mix them in with relatives to more famous people and that's pretty much what we get here. Electra isn't the hot item she once was. O'Connell is the brother to Jerry and we all know who Hogan is. Christoper Olen Ray is even the son of cult filmmakers Fred Olen Ray. Again, if anyone goes into a movie like this expecting quality then that's their problem and not the films. The majority of the titles I've seen from The Asylum have been horrid but this one here is thankfully so bad that you can have some fun with it. Just one example is Hogan who gives one of the worst performances I've seen in a very long time. No matter if she's having fun, sad, angry or in fear she's always speaking in the same tone and delivering her lines the same way. Obviously she doesn't know how to express any sort of emotion so she just stays the same throughout all of them. Just check out the sequence where she's talking about a traumatizing event in her life and be sure to laugh it up. Electra at least still looks extremely good but she keeps her clothes on (as does Hogan in case you're wondering). The film does feature some nudity for those expecting that type of thing. The CGI sharks are poorly done but that's the type of thing you'd expect from a movie like this. The ending of the movie is downright silly as is the subplot of the island they're on is sinking. 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK is pure "Z" grade material but I'll at least give the director credit for keeping it moving at a nice pace and making it at least entertaining in a bad way.
** (out of 4)
If you're expecting something like JAWS then I really hope you don't rent or buy a movie called 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK. This film from the one and only The Asylum has a group of kids going out to do research when their boat is attacked by the title creature. Soon many are eaten while others stand around with dumb looks on their faces but have no fear because Carmen Electra, Charlie O'Connell and Brooke Hogan are on hand. 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK is a very, very bad movie but once you realize that this is a straight-to-DVD flick from The Asylum then you realize that it shouldn't be taken serious and it's okay to laugh at it. Those old enough will probably remember in the 80s when low-budget movies like this one would attract used up, former stars and mix them in with relatives to more famous people and that's pretty much what we get here. Electra isn't the hot item she once was. O'Connell is the brother to Jerry and we all know who Hogan is. Christoper Olen Ray is even the son of cult filmmakers Fred Olen Ray. Again, if anyone goes into a movie like this expecting quality then that's their problem and not the films. The majority of the titles I've seen from The Asylum have been horrid but this one here is thankfully so bad that you can have some fun with it. Just one example is Hogan who gives one of the worst performances I've seen in a very long time. No matter if she's having fun, sad, angry or in fear she's always speaking in the same tone and delivering her lines the same way. Obviously she doesn't know how to express any sort of emotion so she just stays the same throughout all of them. Just check out the sequence where she's talking about a traumatizing event in her life and be sure to laugh it up. Electra at least still looks extremely good but she keeps her clothes on (as does Hogan in case you're wondering). The film does feature some nudity for those expecting that type of thing. The CGI sharks are poorly done but that's the type of thing you'd expect from a movie like this. The ending of the movie is downright silly as is the subplot of the island they're on is sinking. 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK is pure "Z" grade material but I'll at least give the director credit for keeping it moving at a nice pace and making it at least entertaining in a bad way.
Title Explains the film
jerekra26 January 2014
Two-Headed Shark attack was one of those movies that was exactly how I thought it would be.
This group of scientists or something get stranded on a island when their boat breaks down. There they must find a way to escape and also must avoid being attacked by this huge two headed shark.
The story is pretty typical for a syfy movie. Two-Headed shark appears and attacks. The CG for the shark is OK at best, but they do not really explain how the shark came into existence really well.
The action scenes with the shark are good. Nothing that stands out.
Another reason to see this movie is all the hot chicks in bikinis who get attacked by the shark. Overall the acting is pretty bad in this movie. Carmen Elektra I think does a pretty horrible job acting and only adds sex appeal (but not even that much of that). Brook Hogan I think did an average job acting, but that means by far she is the best actor in the whole film.
So, the shark is OK, the acting is bad, and the story is predictable. I say see it if you like these bad shark movies, otherwise stay away.
This group of scientists or something get stranded on a island when their boat breaks down. There they must find a way to escape and also must avoid being attacked by this huge two headed shark.
The story is pretty typical for a syfy movie. Two-Headed shark appears and attacks. The CG for the shark is OK at best, but they do not really explain how the shark came into existence really well.
The action scenes with the shark are good. Nothing that stands out.
Another reason to see this movie is all the hot chicks in bikinis who get attacked by the shark. Overall the acting is pretty bad in this movie. Carmen Elektra I think does a pretty horrible job acting and only adds sex appeal (but not even that much of that). Brook Hogan I think did an average job acting, but that means by far she is the best actor in the whole film.
So, the shark is OK, the acting is bad, and the story is predictable. I say see it if you like these bad shark movies, otherwise stay away.
Comedy
Hollynxn1 November 2012
I have never laughed so hard in my life. I don't know why this movie is not featured under the comedy section on Netflix. I knew it was geared up to be a terrible movie; however, I was not expecting graphics worse than my N64 with worse than elementary school children with little to no rehearsing. This movie left me speechless but not in the same way that Deep blue Sea left me speechless. Deep Blue Sea left me frightened by smarter sharks. 2-headed shark attack left me stunned that I completed viewing the film. I could go on all day but one thing actually bothered me more than anything. None of the characters are rattled at all that there is a shark with two heads. They're not happy it's a shark. They note that two heads means two sets of teeth. No one is concerned where this two headed monstrosity came from. Are there more? Is it a Frankenshark? We'll never know unless there is a sequel featuring more bundles of laughs.
A new definition for "bottom of the barrel"
Leofwine_draca7 August 2014
While I consider myself a fan of the recent wave of cheesy, CGI-enhanced monster flicks a la SHARKNADO, even I have standards - and unfortunately, despite the great title, 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK doesn't meet them. This is an entirely Z-grade film which takes PIRANHA 3D as its inspiration and fails to make a decent movie out of a rip-off.
The film is clumsily made and badly written throughout. The cast is almost entirely populated by annoying teen stereotypes and blonde bimbos, chief of whom is Hulk Hogan's daughter Brooke - an actress she isn't! Backing her up is Carmen Electra in a more minor role as a doctor; you may remember her from the likes of SCARY MOVIE back in the day, and she's still trying to play the same role and hiding her age by smothering her face in makeup.
Due to budgetary constraints, the whole film is set on a ship where those on board have to contend with one of the worst special effects yet put on film. This shark is a crude bit of CGI animation to say the least, and randomly changes size depending on the scene. There are many gory deaths, but the majority of effects are done on the computer; I felt like I was watching somebody playing THE SIMS at various times.
Needless to say, the acting is horrible, the script is dumb, and Christopher Douglas Olen-Ray's direction is vapid (no surprise that this guy is the son of infamous cult director Fred Olen-Ray). The amount of continuity errors and dumb decisions made on the part of the cast is unbelievable; I think the whole 'randomly sinking atoll' part of the story was the most jaw-dropping. In any case, this is a real stinker.
The film is clumsily made and badly written throughout. The cast is almost entirely populated by annoying teen stereotypes and blonde bimbos, chief of whom is Hulk Hogan's daughter Brooke - an actress she isn't! Backing her up is Carmen Electra in a more minor role as a doctor; you may remember her from the likes of SCARY MOVIE back in the day, and she's still trying to play the same role and hiding her age by smothering her face in makeup.
Due to budgetary constraints, the whole film is set on a ship where those on board have to contend with one of the worst special effects yet put on film. This shark is a crude bit of CGI animation to say the least, and randomly changes size depending on the scene. There are many gory deaths, but the majority of effects are done on the computer; I felt like I was watching somebody playing THE SIMS at various times.
Needless to say, the acting is horrible, the script is dumb, and Christopher Douglas Olen-Ray's direction is vapid (no surprise that this guy is the son of infamous cult director Fred Olen-Ray). The amount of continuity errors and dumb decisions made on the part of the cast is unbelievable; I think the whole 'randomly sinking atoll' part of the story was the most jaw-dropping. In any case, this is a real stinker.
Meh
13Funbags12 October 2019
This movie should have been called Hot Chicks That Can Fix Anything. In typical bad shark movie fashion, the shark's behavior and abilities constantly change. It can eat 2 people in one bite, then it can't bite through 1 person. It can't go into shallow water, then it can get to the shore. The only thing that could have made this interesting would have been a topless Brooke Hogan.
Science Has Nothing to Do With This!
Vincent_B25 August 2013
Warning: Spoilers
I tossed on the spoiler tag --but to be honest-- the movie spoils itself.
By the start of this movie, you will be begging the two headed shark to eat everyone in that yacht, and save room for the producer, director, and anyone who invested money in this movie. The movie makes a lot of dubious statements and the script makes a great deal of common sense errors. The plot is real simple; two headed shark meets a boat load of hot college students... bimbo happy meal ensues.
Ah, so lets get on with the real stupid science. The two head shark can change its size. The animal appears to be able to scale itself for the needed work to be done. The shark in some scenes is as big as a truck, yet is able to sneak up on people wading in waist deep water completely unseen. This creature is able to bite or punch holes in an 80 foot metal yacht. It roars like a lion and not only attacks its prey but plays with it like a kitten with a ball of yarn. Fine... enough with the crappy shark.
Next we have people who are in college aboard a huge boat and they hit a dead fish in the water and it is being pushed by the bow. Any boat captain is going to stop the engines and find out what they hit and clear it off. Common sense right? Instead they continue to push the dead carcass through the water and the professor attempts to snag it with a boat hook.
While the boat is being "repaired", the kids go ashore an atoll and look for scrap metal... They find plenty of neat stuff even a gun, gasoline, and two more boats. They discover the atoll is sinking??? Sinking uh gee professor do you think there might be some coconuts we can use to make a telephone and call for help?
Later in the story with half the students on the sinking atoll, the brilliant college professor says, "The kids are in danger!" So the two crewmen (who don't speak English) the professor and his doctor girlfriend get into the dingy and head for the atoll. Why on Earth would you send a full dingy to rescue a dozen people from a sinking island. This left the huge boat empty and no one fixing their only way home.
We get treated by weird bimbo science near the end of this film as we learn that a can of gasoline makes huge fireball explosions when bitten by a shark. If you like movies where the science never makes sense or the motive behind peoples actions is highly questionable, this is your movie.
By the start of this movie, you will be begging the two headed shark to eat everyone in that yacht, and save room for the producer, director, and anyone who invested money in this movie. The movie makes a lot of dubious statements and the script makes a great deal of common sense errors. The plot is real simple; two headed shark meets a boat load of hot college students... bimbo happy meal ensues.
Ah, so lets get on with the real stupid science. The two head shark can change its size. The animal appears to be able to scale itself for the needed work to be done. The shark in some scenes is as big as a truck, yet is able to sneak up on people wading in waist deep water completely unseen. This creature is able to bite or punch holes in an 80 foot metal yacht. It roars like a lion and not only attacks its prey but plays with it like a kitten with a ball of yarn. Fine... enough with the crappy shark.
Next we have people who are in college aboard a huge boat and they hit a dead fish in the water and it is being pushed by the bow. Any boat captain is going to stop the engines and find out what they hit and clear it off. Common sense right? Instead they continue to push the dead carcass through the water and the professor attempts to snag it with a boat hook.
While the boat is being "repaired", the kids go ashore an atoll and look for scrap metal... They find plenty of neat stuff even a gun, gasoline, and two more boats. They discover the atoll is sinking??? Sinking uh gee professor do you think there might be some coconuts we can use to make a telephone and call for help?
Later in the story with half the students on the sinking atoll, the brilliant college professor says, "The kids are in danger!" So the two crewmen (who don't speak English) the professor and his doctor girlfriend get into the dingy and head for the atoll. Why on Earth would you send a full dingy to rescue a dozen people from a sinking island. This left the huge boat empty and no one fixing their only way home.
We get treated by weird bimbo science near the end of this film as we learn that a can of gasoline makes huge fireball explosions when bitten by a shark. If you like movies where the science never makes sense or the motive behind peoples actions is highly questionable, this is your movie.
Not as bad as you think!
doctorsmoothlove27 April 2020
Warning: Spoilers
"2-Headed Shark Attack" is an intriguing entry within the oeuvre of The Asylum's output. Much of the studio's modern output draws inspiration from televisual storytelling; namely the presentation of conflict immediately without the slower context a film allows. The result is the viewer feels as if she is watching a random episode of a TV show without the benefit of context.
2-Headed Shark Attack's script would read as if it were like that. Yet the film has a cinematic feel. It does this with its beautiful scenery of the Florida coast and its numerous shots of hot babes. The actors aren't always filmed in close ups because nature is beautiful and free. The lack of a restriction for a TV network means that the filmmakers can indulge in the more lurid, lingering shots of tits that gives the film a spark of cinema lacking in so many other of The Asylum's films.
The script plays as a genre picture. The shark of this film happens to have two heads. Not that we care. It does lead to some fun set pieces some of which are practical. I especially like the scene where the ocean orgy girls are simultaneously eaten. Blood spews from their mouths and they disappear into the water. It's nice that no explanation is offered for the shark. It's only there as a plot device and needs no explanation because no one really cares.
The film suffers from poor editing. On the Blu Ray I watched, certain frames appear to be missing as if someone lost a reel. That is obviously not the case as this is a digital film. The lack of polish is actually helpful in distinguishing this as a film and not a TV show. A film can be thrown together by a hack on vacation for a quick buck and most shows have a boardroom mentality backing them. Someone at least had a great vacation making this movie. The kids seem like they had fun too.
The CGI is surprisingly poor even in the context of the genre. It has that stop motion look old CGI had that makes you wish you were watching actual stop motion. The shark also seems to change size whenever the script demands someone die in a specific manner. Due to how frequent the attacks occur, the repeated use of the same isolated, CGI image is tiresome. If you recall watching films in the 90's, you will remember when CGI was disconnected from anything happening in the real world. Such happens here. The dissonance is broken by occasional close ups of the shark's mouth in isolation which don't look that bad. It's just a shame that we don't get to see the prop munch anyone. Bad CGI is just hard to swallow even when compared to bad props. It is why a film like "2-Headed Shark Attack" is worse that an equally terrible film like "Monster Shark."
2-Headed Shark Attack's script would read as if it were like that. Yet the film has a cinematic feel. It does this with its beautiful scenery of the Florida coast and its numerous shots of hot babes. The actors aren't always filmed in close ups because nature is beautiful and free. The lack of a restriction for a TV network means that the filmmakers can indulge in the more lurid, lingering shots of tits that gives the film a spark of cinema lacking in so many other of The Asylum's films.
The script plays as a genre picture. The shark of this film happens to have two heads. Not that we care. It does lead to some fun set pieces some of which are practical. I especially like the scene where the ocean orgy girls are simultaneously eaten. Blood spews from their mouths and they disappear into the water. It's nice that no explanation is offered for the shark. It's only there as a plot device and needs no explanation because no one really cares.
The film suffers from poor editing. On the Blu Ray I watched, certain frames appear to be missing as if someone lost a reel. That is obviously not the case as this is a digital film. The lack of polish is actually helpful in distinguishing this as a film and not a TV show. A film can be thrown together by a hack on vacation for a quick buck and most shows have a boardroom mentality backing them. Someone at least had a great vacation making this movie. The kids seem like they had fun too.
The CGI is surprisingly poor even in the context of the genre. It has that stop motion look old CGI had that makes you wish you were watching actual stop motion. The shark also seems to change size whenever the script demands someone die in a specific manner. Due to how frequent the attacks occur, the repeated use of the same isolated, CGI image is tiresome. If you recall watching films in the 90's, you will remember when CGI was disconnected from anything happening in the real world. Such happens here. The dissonance is broken by occasional close ups of the shark's mouth in isolation which don't look that bad. It's just a shame that we don't get to see the prop munch anyone. Bad CGI is just hard to swallow even when compared to bad props. It is why a film like "2-Headed Shark Attack" is worse that an equally terrible film like "Monster Shark."
Big tits shark attack
trashgang22 July 2012
With a title like this coming from The Asylum productions you know that you are in big problems. You know that it will be a turkey and it will have cheap and bad CGI effects. But still somehow you want to see those flicks for some reason unexplainable.
The acting is terrible, Carmen Electra is casted not for her acting abilities but just for showing off her body. She does it in one bathing scene but sadly for the Kleenex boys this time she leaves her clothes on. The other main lead is Brooke Hogan (Kate), just watch her mouth and you know who her dad is, ex WWE wrestler Hulk Hogan. She do perform a bit but is also cast for her 2-headed....I won't go into the acting of the others because it's not worth mentioning.
The flick itself is full of mistakes. Once on the beach they are looking at a motorboat race but then they are almost close to shore next shot they are miles away. Even so for the shark, then he's huge and then he has a normal size. He can't go into shallow water because he's to big but when some are just up to their knees in the water he still can swim in it and attack.
There's no gore to see because once the victims are bitten by the shark it's all CGI, even the persons. When they are being bitten above water it's a rubber shark with bad teeth others than the CGI shark.
But be honest, this is only watchable for guys. All girls do walk around in bikini's and are big-busted babes. And of course the gratuitous nudity is in tact when two girls go skinny-dipping.
Too watch with a beer and chips and invite your male friends, you will have a big time but to watch it as a serious flick...naah.
Gore 0/5 Nudity 1/5 Effects 1/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0/5
The acting is terrible, Carmen Electra is casted not for her acting abilities but just for showing off her body. She does it in one bathing scene but sadly for the Kleenex boys this time she leaves her clothes on. The other main lead is Brooke Hogan (Kate), just watch her mouth and you know who her dad is, ex WWE wrestler Hulk Hogan. She do perform a bit but is also cast for her 2-headed....I won't go into the acting of the others because it's not worth mentioning.
The flick itself is full of mistakes. Once on the beach they are looking at a motorboat race but then they are almost close to shore next shot they are miles away. Even so for the shark, then he's huge and then he has a normal size. He can't go into shallow water because he's to big but when some are just up to their knees in the water he still can swim in it and attack.
There's no gore to see because once the victims are bitten by the shark it's all CGI, even the persons. When they are being bitten above water it's a rubber shark with bad teeth others than the CGI shark.
But be honest, this is only watchable for guys. All girls do walk around in bikini's and are big-busted babes. And of course the gratuitous nudity is in tact when two girls go skinny-dipping.
Too watch with a beer and chips and invite your male friends, you will have a big time but to watch it as a serious flick...naah.
Gore 0/5 Nudity 1/5 Effects 1/5 Story 2/5 Comedy 0/5
Great eye candy
SanteeFats9 September 2012
Warning: Spoilers
Hey it is not the greatest movie but the eye candy, male and female, is really nice, at least the female ones in my eyes. Thank goodness for the subtitles when the two crewmen talk. I have no idea what language they are speaking but I like them in the movie.When the ship and the crew/passengers make landfall on the island things pick up with the need to repair the hull. Of course the woman doing the repairs gets chewed up and killed. A lot of the scenes are predictable, again the eye candy makes it worth watching in my humble opinion. Of course the dumb students do stupid things and get killed off. But what the hey it looks good. Why it only got one star is beyond me. Overall I enjoyed it. Of course a two headed great white is a bit much, only on the SyFy channel.
If it had not been for the shark ...
cyndera2 February 2012
Warning: Spoilers
If the main monster had not been a shark, I would have brought the movie back to Redbox after about 10 minutes. The shark made it slightly better than "Pirahna", but that's about it. I don't think I have ever seen a movie that contained so many mistakes. Not only did the shark have two heads, but it can apparently change its size depending on water level and enemy ... the dimensions of the shark changed constantly. Sometimes it was bigger than a boat, but in the next scene it somehow manages to sneak up on people in about 5 feet of (crystal clear) water. The lady that repaired the boat lost her leg when the shark attacked, but the next scene shows her with both legs again (and flippers, which she did not have earlier). Also, when the shark's first head gets blown off (if you can call those few water drops an explosion), you see a gushing wound where the head had been. A few scenes later, there is no trace of a wound or anything that indicated that this shark had two heads at one point. Oh well, I had a good time commenting the entire movie. The one thing I am still waiting for is an explanation about the hole in the ground, in the first 1/3 of the movie ... Have fun!
Amazing!
claytonrabe19 April 2012
Warning: Spoilers
This might be the greatest cinematic achievement of all time. This is one of the most unpredictable, beautiful, and breathtaking movies I have ever seen.
First, the plot goes like any other average teen horror movie. You expect since they are on the water, a shark will show up. Well, if you would assume that, then you are only partially right. What you probably didn't expect is that the shark would have two heads, which is what really sets this movie apart from the rest. It is a completely original groundbreaking idea that will be setting the standards for film makers for years to come.
Things start to go wrong, to the surprise of me and I'm sure everyone else who watched this film. The characters eventually get onto an island, which led me to believe that they were safe. This let me catch my breath for a slight second, only to have it taken away again by the twist that the island was sinking! After that detail was revealed, I was on the edge of my seat for the rest of the movie.
The actors gave some of the best performances I have ever seen, especially Carmen Electra as the doctor. I didn't think she was a doctor, but I guess I was wrong. She pulled it off better than any actress in the history of film could.
The idea of a two headed shark in this movie is absolutely genius. It is an idea never before seen in a movie. The idea scared the hell out of me! I couldn't wrap the idea of a two headed shark around my head, so I started putting things together. I thought, "Okay, two headed shark. This means twice the eyes so it can see twice as well. Twice the brains so twice as smart. Also, twice the smell and senses of a normal one headed shark. And...NO WAY!!! TWICE THE TEETH!" The idea of how deadly a two headed shark can be convinced me never to swim in a lake or ocean ever again.
I would highly recommend this movie if you would like to see something completely original and innovative. This movie was a wild ride from start to finish that had me in absolute awe. This should go down as one of the all time classics that should be considered for numerous awards.
First, the plot goes like any other average teen horror movie. You expect since they are on the water, a shark will show up. Well, if you would assume that, then you are only partially right. What you probably didn't expect is that the shark would have two heads, which is what really sets this movie apart from the rest. It is a completely original groundbreaking idea that will be setting the standards for film makers for years to come.
Things start to go wrong, to the surprise of me and I'm sure everyone else who watched this film. The characters eventually get onto an island, which led me to believe that they were safe. This let me catch my breath for a slight second, only to have it taken away again by the twist that the island was sinking! After that detail was revealed, I was on the edge of my seat for the rest of the movie.
The actors gave some of the best performances I have ever seen, especially Carmen Electra as the doctor. I didn't think she was a doctor, but I guess I was wrong. She pulled it off better than any actress in the history of film could.
The idea of a two headed shark in this movie is absolutely genius. It is an idea never before seen in a movie. The idea scared the hell out of me! I couldn't wrap the idea of a two headed shark around my head, so I started putting things together. I thought, "Okay, two headed shark. This means twice the eyes so it can see twice as well. Twice the brains so twice as smart. Also, twice the smell and senses of a normal one headed shark. And...NO WAY!!! TWICE THE TEETH!" The idea of how deadly a two headed shark can be convinced me never to swim in a lake or ocean ever again.
I would highly recommend this movie if you would like to see something completely original and innovative. This movie was a wild ride from start to finish that had me in absolute awe. This should go down as one of the all time classics that should be considered for numerous awards.
almost delivers
hopla686 February 2012
Warning: Spoilers
I just reviewed " Sand Sharks" which has a lot of things in common with this little flick; however some of the good parts are unfortunately not to be found in this one. Which is a shame.
The good stuff:
Unfortunately now the longer list of bad stuff
So there were all the ingredients, boobs, blood and a monster and a goofy story but somehow it doesn't cement right. In my opinion because the actors ( besides Brooke) looked simply bored and didn't see the joke or couldn't act. And what was left was killed by the pacing.
However.. Carmen Elektra and her sunbathing scene gave this review one point extra, same with the surprisingly solid acting skills of Brooke.
The good stuff:
- cool monster, which is shown a lot. The Asylum brought in a little bit more money so there are not only the so so CGI images but also the practical " someone is getting munched on" effects work. - Carmen Elektra.. enough said. She is 39 years old and she still has killer looks and a great body. - lots and lots of kills, a lot of them somewhat original. - okay, a semi lesbian threesome make out scene. - Brooke Hogans acting is really okay, which was a surprise for me too but it is.
Unfortunately now the longer list of bad stuff
- the acting is awful, really I don't expect any academy awards for these type of movies but sweet lord this was even for this genre cringe worthy. - the story drags, they even throw in a sinking island but that doesn't help. Running time is something like 87 minutes including titles but feels longer, a deadly sin with these kind of movies. - the story contains plot holes that are simply too big, people get eaten ( of course because they wander off to make out in a semi lesbian threesome) and are not missed until the final third of the movie. - the climax simply sucks, of course the shark needs to die but this was done in a duh manner. Another sin, golden rule is that the payoff needs to be cool and fun.
So there were all the ingredients, boobs, blood and a monster and a goofy story but somehow it doesn't cement right. In my opinion because the actors ( besides Brooke) looked simply bored and didn't see the joke or couldn't act. And what was left was killed by the pacing.
However.. Carmen Elektra and her sunbathing scene gave this review one point extra, same with the surprisingly solid acting skills of Brooke.
Fun in a "less than 80 IQ" sort of way
CanadianBill30 July 2014
So the basic premise of the plot is a group of students on a school-sanctioned educational sea excursion are besieged by a giant two-headed shark. They seek refuge on a small island where they are served up as a buffet to said shark while often providing eye candy shots to viewers who are starving for anything of value in the film.
The good -- Brooke Hogan shows several small glimmers of hope as a b movie actor. She's the only one of the cast really adding any merit to this turkey of a movie at all, but in light of the poor writing and sub-basement direction that's not saying much.
There are also several eye candy shots of other females, a sex-implied scene with topless nudity, and a modelling shoot style scene custom made for the "star" of the movie Carmen Electra.
The Bad -- Pretty much just about everything else. Terrible writing of a plot machine-gun-riddled with holes, atrocious dialogue writing, producers and a director having no sense of continuity whatsoever nor any imaginative acumen at all.
Carmen Electra's character really doesn't have to be there at all, having no visible purpose other than eye candy and one more person running around until the inevitable (and predictable) end.
O'Connel's acting turn as the teacher who steps up and protects his flock of young charges leaves so much to be desired it is beyond painful to accept much less watch.
In short, this movie is a single star film at best, a waste of effort by all involvede containing so many moronic choices by the various characters that viewers who force themselves to watch it to the end might actually suffer the loss of several IQ points for having done so.
In lieu of actual content it relies heavily on the gratuitous T&A scenes, topless shots, etc, to raise the worth of the film to one worth watching, but that's simply asking too much in this case. The only way that would have happened is if they'd turned it into a full-fledged porno flick and be done with it. And even then it would only slightly have been "less painful" to watch.
However, if you're a fan of b-cheese shark movies with bad acting supported by a production crew lacking any sort of movie-making talent whatsoever, and you love seeing people run around like complete idiots until they become monster chow, AND you can accept the fact that you're taking your chances on getting one of the most implausible endings in movie history, then and only then... this one is for you and is absolutely a must-see.
For the rest of the world my advice is avoid at all costs unless you're trapped at a remote location with a TV/movie player and only THIS piece of crap to watch to pass the time. And even then I recommend you find something else to do.
1/10
The good -- Brooke Hogan shows several small glimmers of hope as a b movie actor. She's the only one of the cast really adding any merit to this turkey of a movie at all, but in light of the poor writing and sub-basement direction that's not saying much.
There are also several eye candy shots of other females, a sex-implied scene with topless nudity, and a modelling shoot style scene custom made for the "star" of the movie Carmen Electra.
The Bad -- Pretty much just about everything else. Terrible writing of a plot machine-gun-riddled with holes, atrocious dialogue writing, producers and a director having no sense of continuity whatsoever nor any imaginative acumen at all.
Carmen Electra's character really doesn't have to be there at all, having no visible purpose other than eye candy and one more person running around until the inevitable (and predictable) end.
O'Connel's acting turn as the teacher who steps up and protects his flock of young charges leaves so much to be desired it is beyond painful to accept much less watch.
In short, this movie is a single star film at best, a waste of effort by all involvede containing so many moronic choices by the various characters that viewers who force themselves to watch it to the end might actually suffer the loss of several IQ points for having done so.
In lieu of actual content it relies heavily on the gratuitous T&A scenes, topless shots, etc, to raise the worth of the film to one worth watching, but that's simply asking too much in this case. The only way that would have happened is if they'd turned it into a full-fledged porno flick and be done with it. And even then it would only slightly have been "less painful" to watch.
However, if you're a fan of b-cheese shark movies with bad acting supported by a production crew lacking any sort of movie-making talent whatsoever, and you love seeing people run around like complete idiots until they become monster chow, AND you can accept the fact that you're taking your chances on getting one of the most implausible endings in movie history, then and only then... this one is for you and is absolutely a must-see.
For the rest of the world my advice is avoid at all costs unless you're trapped at a remote location with a TV/movie player and only THIS piece of crap to watch to pass the time. And even then I recommend you find something else to do.
1/10
Nearly nude girls battling a two-headed shark should have been more fun than this
Zbigniew_Krycsiwiki6 August 2015
Don't blink or you'll miss the opening death scene entirely, in this quickly tiring shlockfest about a double-headed CG-shark chomps down on some chowderheads stranded near a small island, which they repeatedly claim is an atoll ( a coral formation, usually circular or ring- shaped ), despite the fact that it is clearly a small island ( a slab of land completely surrounded by water ).
The first 30 minutes were fairly amusing, with plenty of good looking girls wearing as little as possible, and a couple of unintentional laughs at the bottom of the barrel effects, but the film played all its cards in the first 30 minutes, and spends the next hour repeating itself, after its topless lesbian kissing session.
Carmen Electra turns up just to tan in front of the camera and for her ( oh so slight ) name value, her character could have been edited out completely and the film would be no different.
The characters display some of the most moronic behaviour, even for an Asylum picture, that they almost deserve to be swallowed whole, and the effects go from being laughably bad, to mind-numbingly stupid, as the shark's size changes dramatically from one scene to the next. Apparently toward the latter stages of the film, it grows so large that it threatens to sink the island/ atoll, and these blockheads must pool together all of their room temperature IQs and figure how to stay alive, and kill this shark.
The first 30 minutes were fairly amusing, with plenty of good looking girls wearing as little as possible, and a couple of unintentional laughs at the bottom of the barrel effects, but the film played all its cards in the first 30 minutes, and spends the next hour repeating itself, after its topless lesbian kissing session.
Carmen Electra turns up just to tan in front of the camera and for her ( oh so slight ) name value, her character could have been edited out completely and the film would be no different.
The characters display some of the most moronic behaviour, even for an Asylum picture, that they almost deserve to be swallowed whole, and the effects go from being laughably bad, to mind-numbingly stupid, as the shark's size changes dramatically from one scene to the next. Apparently toward the latter stages of the film, it grows so large that it threatens to sink the island/ atoll, and these blockheads must pool together all of their room temperature IQs and figure how to stay alive, and kill this shark.
See also
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