The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Weekend Vortex (2012)

Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sheldon Cooper : I always thought if I were ever enslaved, it would be by an advanced species from another planet. Not some hotsie-totsie from Glendale.

• Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon, my relatives are going to want to talk to you and you're going to be sitting there playing a game? Isn't that a little rude?

  Sheldon Cooper : Oh, I got that covered. Headset. I won't hear a word the old geezers are saying.

• Sheldon Cooper : When's the last time I asked you to do something for me?

  Penny : Yesterday. You made me look in your ear to see if there was a ladybug in it.

  Sheldon Cooper : When is the last time I asked you to do something that wasn't a medical emergency?

  Penny : Yesterday. You made me look in your ear to see if there was a ladybug in it.

• Sheldon Cooper : All right then, I have no choice but to go on to plan B.

  Penny : What's that?

  Sheldon Cooper : I'm gonna run around outside with a wet head and try to catch a cold.

• Sheldon Cooper : I think I understand. You're the one person who can say Sheldon Cooper is your boyfriend, but that rings hollow if you can't lord him over others in the flesh.

• Sheldon Cooper : Gentlemen, the game offers us a choice between playing for the Republic and the light side or the Sith Empire and the dark side.

  Leonard Hofstadter : We're always the good guys. In D&D, we're lawful good. In City of Heroes, we're the heroes. In Grand Theft Auto, we pay the prostitutes promptly and never hit them with a bat

  Sheldon Cooper : Those women are prostitutes? You said they were raising money for stem cell research.

• Amy Farrah Fowler : Gentlemen, as much as I'm sure Sheldon would enjoy playing intergalactic make-believe, he and I have other plans. We are attending my Aunt Flora's 93rd birthday party.

  Sheldon Cooper : Just tell her I can't come.

  Amy Farrah Fowler : She'll be disappointed if we don't show up.

  Sheldon Cooper : She's 93. She won't be disappointed for very long.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Bernadette, remember your character's the healer in our group. You're in charge of healing all of us, not just Howard.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : I can't help it. My Howie-Wowie has an owie!

  Sheldon Cooper : That is the most sickeningly sweet thing I have ever experienced, and I am sipping Kool-Aid through a Red Vine.

• Amy Farrah Fowler : Now hang on. I followed all the protocols set forth by you in the relationship agreement. I made a written request seventy-two hours in advance. Checked the tire pressure on the car. I even contacted the Centers for Disease Control to find out what shots they recommend for travel to Orange County. FYI, it's none.

  Sheldon Cooper : Amy, the Relationship Agreement was not designed for either one of us to get our way.

  Amy Farrah Fowler : You use it to get your way.

  Sheldon Cooper : I use it to get the right way. The fact that the right way is also my way is a happy coincidence.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Sheldon, clear your weekend. Starting Saturday morning, Star Wars marathon!

  Raj Koothrappali : Woo-hoo!

  Leonard Hofstadter : Movies or video-games? Or board games? Or trading card games? Or Legos? Or dress-up? Or comic books? Or dramatic readings of novelizations? Yes to all!

  Leonard Hofstadter : We are going to play the on-line game.

  Sheldon Cooper : The on-line game. Bully!

• Sheldon Cooper : These are Cooper Coupons. These are for various things I can do for you. This one is for one free grammar check. You can use it for emails, letters, tattoos, what have you. Oh, this is a fun one. This is an afternoon with me at the California Science Center, where I point out their mistakes.

• Sheldon Cooper : Who wants to spend the whole weekend running around a bunch of pretend planets battling made-up monsters? That's for babies.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, but it's got lightsabers.

  Sheldon Cooper : Please, Amy! It's got lightsabers!