Atop the Fourth Wall (TV Series)

The Hobbit #1 (2014)

Lewis Lovhaug: Linkara

Quotes 

• Linkara : IT'S CHRISTMASTIME! And as you can see, I'm all decked out for the holidays! We've decorated the place with so much Christmas that Santa is telling me I should tone it down a bit. And what better way to get into the festive season than with the most Christmasy of all stories: "The Hobbit"! What? Tolkien is totally Christmasy! There's the snowy pass over the Misty Mountains; Gandalf and Saruman have big, long Santa Claus beards; and Gollum represents the dangers of greed and materialism over love and companionship.

  [holds up hand in resignation] 

  Linkara : Okay, let's be honest, I'm doing this because the damn movies have been released every December, and the final one is coming out soon, so this is my best chance to cash in on it before the public stops caring about it.

• Linkara : The "Hobbit" movies themselves have been polarizing for people, but let me give some quick backstory on the off-chance you've avoided the "Lord of the Rings" franchise. The series takes place in the fantasy world of Middle-earth, full of elves, dwarves, goblins and various other magical creatures. One such creature is the titular Hobbit. They're small people, even smaller than dwarves, known in particular for not wearing shoes because of the thick, hairy feet they have. We're focused mainly on the Hobbits of the Shire, a small village in the country, where Hobbits live in little houses built out of hills. Various kingdoms make war with one another or are cold allies as they seek their own agendas, and every character has at least fifteen different names that you easily get confused about. Yeah, the names thing is something even bizarre for a fantasy story. Who does that, having so many different names they go by? It'd be like saying, "My name is Linkara, or Lewis, or Psyweedle, or Thickmaster, or That Guy With The Hat, or That Unfunny Guy Who Reviews Comic Books On the Internet."

  [smiles coyly] 

• Linkara : We open in the Shire, with text lifted straight from the book.

  Narrator : In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.

  Linkara : Property taxes were surprisingly high for "a hole in the ground". And that's most of the first page: just narration lifted wholesale from the book about hobbits and their habits, while our protagonist, Bilbo Baggins, smokes on his front porch. You know, it's lazy drug addicts like this that are bringing this entire community down! GET A JOB, BILBO!

• Gandalf : I am Gandalf, and Gandalf means me.

  Linkara : [as Gandalf]  And the wonderful thing about Gandalfs is that Gandalfs are wonderful things.

• Linkara : Much like the expanded universe of Star Wars, every character of even minor import has an intricate backstory and name, even if it really is not necessary. But there are entire reference books devoted to the subject. But fortunately, we won't have to cover any of that for this one. The big controversy about the "Hobbit" movie trilogy is its length, spreading a short novel into three movies with padding from other material in the franchise by creator J.R.R. Tolkien, although one's feelings about it really comes down to personal preference, since...

  [smiles nervously] 

  Linkara : ... if I may be controversial... I kinda like the movies better than the book.

• Linkara : [about his preference for the Hobbit movies over the books]  That opinion can always change, and I'll probably get into this more as we progress through these comics, but I personally like the fact that these movies are long and there are three of them. Having finally read the book in anticipation of these reviews - I tried and failed to read it in high school - a lot happens in "The Hobbit", so much so that I fear that if this had been condensed into one movie, it would move far too fast! And no, I have not seen the animated version, so I may be wrong on that point, but in the first hundred pages alone, which today's comic encompasses, you've got the introduction of all the dwarves, the introduction to Bilbo, the dinner scene, the three trolls, meeting Elrond, the giants in the mountain, the goblins, and Bilbo encountering Gollum. Under normal circumstances, for an adaptation, you'd cut some of this out, but the movies take the time do some world-building and some character development, even if it's purely invented for the movies. Because let's be honest here: the only dwarf that matters in the book is Thorin, which is kind of irritating because why the hell did you include thirteen dwarves if you weren't going to DO ANYTHING WITH THEM?

• Linkara : Some people have told me that the issue is that it's meant to be a bedtime story read to children, with goofy names and funny details, and I can certainly see that in places. However, it makes for a pretty crappy novel if you're sacrificing novel structure and elements strictly for it to be read to others. But even as just a funny bedtime story, I have problems with it. I don't know, maybe my childhood was different, but I wouldn't settle for this kind of tedium as a child. The reason I couldn't finish it when I was younger was because they shoved in all the dwarves without establishing any characters or distinctness other than beard and hood color. I knew more about what kind of jam and beer they ordered than I did their characters! You give me thirteen character names and I expect them to actually be characters and not just funny words, because I live in a world where, in stories, characters actually have to have a reason to be a part of the story! And if you weren't actually going to actually make all the dwarves have their own unique personalities, why did you bother to include that many? If you wanted humor, why not just have one dwarf with a single, really long name? In fact, I think it's actually funnier that way: Thorinbedoringlorinpaporintatorin... Oakenshield.

• Linkara : The cover is basic, but enjoyably bright. It looks kind of like concept art for the movies, with Gandalf talking to Bilbo. The hobbit hole looks straight out of the films. I really should rewatch the special features of the movies to see where they got the design work for this stuff, but I already had to do additional reading for the sake of this review. And even then, it's more just trivia at this point. One thing that does bug me is Gandalf's hat. Oh, don't get me wrong, the book does describe his hat as blue, so you can't fault the artist for getting the details right. It just seems odd to me that someone who goes by the name "Gandalf the Grey" has more color to his attire. I mean, what do the two blue wizards that are a part of his order wear? All blue except big red hats? Are we sure that it's just Saruman whose of many colors? And then of course, there's the pipe that Bilbo is using down there. Do you really need a pipe that's as long as you are tall? Or is this actually a bong?