- Denny 'DC' Carlson: The biggest problem with music today is pop. Pop is a cancer on the business. It's "artists" like Cook & Banks that make people turn off their radios, bored-o-rama. They're just poppy nonsense. Fairy floss crap.
- Jack Cook: I'm Jack, by the way. Jack Cook
- Oliver Banks: I know. We've been going to the same school since we were in 2nd grade
- Jack Cook: No shit? Small world.
- Oliver Banks: And half of our high school goes here, so...
- Jack Cook: Then why don't I know your name?
- Oliver Banks: ...I guess you're kind of a dick
- Hank Giles: It's been great having you here. I'm sorry Tom Jones passed. From what I hear, he's a huge fan of Inuit throat singing. It's like all he listens to.
- Kathleen Felix: I wanted to talk to you about something.
- Jack Cook: Look, I only found Dustin Hoffman attractive very briefly...
- Kathleen Felix: No. I love directing music videos, your music videos. But I want to make films
- Jack Cook: Right.
- Kathleen Felix: And I can't really do that living in St. Louis.
- Jack Cook: Oh.