So, let me start by saying I will watch this whole movie than update as and if needed. I love cheesy cheeky horror films I truely do. My partner refuses to look at my streaming accounts due to the amount I watch, thus the reason why this title showed up.
With that said let me give my review based on the first 3 minutes .. yes, the first three minutes of this movie.
The opening scene is what I assume is "the cabin". I am already confused by this screen and wondering what they are trying to say by this. It appears to be dusk or maybe later. The cabin and trees are brightly light with flood lights. I can't tell if it's supposed to be day or night. Then suddenly, the durt burst open and the heroin runs though the door as two men in shrouds chasing after her though the woods.
She quicky darts and zigzags back and forth, panting and sobbing. Then as the two people catche her, and I think "oh no! She's done for!?" But no! She bust her Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon moves! I again have many questions at this point. Why is she scared? Who is she? How did they catch her if she is so good?
After several round house kicks, dodging attacks like Neo from The Matrix she finishes the last dude with her Kamehameha Elbow Drop.
As I am sitting here befuttled I notice the subtitles have her titled as "Kung Fu Virgin" Okay.... Next thing I know she is spilling her blood on what appers to be a book.. again questions. Where did this book come from?
Then a black CGI death Unicron from what looks like a 12 year olds 1980 Mac computer shows up and stabs her with it's horn and bamn.... 3 minutes of my life gone with me left wondering what just happened.
So yeah, enjoy the movie because I'm unsure what's happening in my life right now.
With that said let me give my review based on the first 3 minutes .. yes, the first three minutes of this movie.
The opening scene is what I assume is "the cabin". I am already confused by this screen and wondering what they are trying to say by this. It appears to be dusk or maybe later. The cabin and trees are brightly light with flood lights. I can't tell if it's supposed to be day or night. Then suddenly, the durt burst open and the heroin runs though the door as two men in shrouds chasing after her though the woods.
She quicky darts and zigzags back and forth, panting and sobbing. Then as the two people catche her, and I think "oh no! She's done for!?" But no! She bust her Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon moves! I again have many questions at this point. Why is she scared? Who is she? How did they catch her if she is so good?
After several round house kicks, dodging attacks like Neo from The Matrix she finishes the last dude with her Kamehameha Elbow Drop.
As I am sitting here befuttled I notice the subtitles have her titled as "Kung Fu Virgin" Okay.... Next thing I know she is spilling her blood on what appers to be a book.. again questions. Where did this book come from?
Then a black CGI death Unicron from what looks like a 12 year olds 1980 Mac computer shows up and stabs her with it's horn and bamn.... 3 minutes of my life gone with me left wondering what just happened.
So yeah, enjoy the movie because I'm unsure what's happening in my life right now.