- Catherine: But we need to find someone really immoral and disgraceful. Like someone who doesn't vote, or recycle.
- Ken the Gay Zombie: But I fried eggs and ovaries, your favourite!
- Rob: Don't you mean fried eggs over easy?
- Ken the Gay Zombie: Oh, that makes more sense.
- President's Aide: It's about a UFB.
- The President: Dear Lord!
- Bellula: UFB, what is that?
- The President: Unfucking Believable.
- Rob: Wow, is that a wrench in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
- The Handyman: Actually... it's a wrench.
- Detective Sheridan: We need a super crime.
- Detective Reeves: But isn't not having a super crime a good thing?
- Brenda: It's a gay party!
- Dylan: With gay people.
- Brenda: Doing gay things.
- Detective Sheridan: Sounds kinda gay.
- 911 Operator: Ma'am, do you need me to send for some assistance?
- Ken the Gay Zombie: Send more brains.
- 911 Operator: Girl, this is not crazy bitch hotline.
- 911 Operator: What do you want?
- Ruth the Housewife: I want your blood all over me.
- 911 Operator: Well, that's just gross and inappropriate.