Photos
Quotes
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Mackenzie Murphy : So, I have an idea. Ooh! Why don't we all just hunker down and play poker all night long, until this whole thing blows over?
Sabrina Pemberton : That's not gonna work for me. Yeah, I'm gonna go to this fundraiser for Planned Parenthood. Probably crash at my friend's place, go to the city tomorrow. So don't just expect to see me too much. You know, we probably won't see each other at all.
Mackenzie Murphy : Hmm.
Sabrina Pemberton : But, hey, let's catch up again in ten years when you need another loan.
Mackenzie Murphy : Listen, Sabrina, I got a lot riding on this gig, so can you do me a favor and not be a big, giant pain in the ass, please?
Sabrina Pemberton : Maybe you don't know this, but Planned Parenthood provides health care to over three million women in this country.
Mackenzie Murphy : Oh, sweetie, I know all about Planned Parenthood. I should have one of those punch cards that gets you a free sub every ten visits.
Sabrina Pemberton : Gross.
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Mackenzie Murphy : I feel like we got off on the wrong foot, and I know you're going through a lot right now, um, with your parents and...
Sabrina Pemberton : Oh, I don't care about that.
Mackenzie Murphy : Oh. Okay, well, whether you do or you don't...
Sabrina Pemberton : I don't.
Mackenzie Murphy : All right, well, the point is I'm your aunt and I want to be the cool aunt. I want you to come to me with boy problems. Or girl problems. I don't assume.
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Sabrina Pemberton : I know you think you're pretty clever with this little plan to drink me under the table. But you see, there are two problems. You're not. And you can't.
[finishing her drink, she takes Mackenzie's and downs it]
Sabrina Pemberton : Peace out, Mackenzie.
[she stands up, grunts, and sits back down]
Mackenzie Murphy : Uh-oh. Something the matter?
Sabrina Pemberton : No, I'm good, I just felt kind of funny for a second.
Mackenzie Murphy : Oh, man. Funny how? Funny like you just drank six different types of sleep medication funny?
Sabrina Pemberton : What?
Mackenzie Murphy : You got straight played, homie.
Sabrina Pemberton : No, but you took it, too. I...
Mackenzie Murphy : I don't want you to worry about me. I can handle my 'Quil.
Sabrina Pemberton : [stammering and slurring her words] Why'd you do that?
Mackenzie Murphy : [mocking her stammer] Because I own you.
Sabrina Pemberton : What?
Mackenzie Murphy : Night night, princess.
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Security Guard : Do you live here?
Sabrina Pemberton : Yeah.
Security Guard : [meaning Mackenzie] Who is this?
Sabrina Pemberton : [smirking] No idea.
Security Guard : Okay, ma'am. Why don't we step outside until we figure this out?
Mackenzie Murphy : You are not even a real cop. You've got a cloth badge.
Security Guard : Don't make me detain you.
Mackenzie Murphy : With what? You have no gun.
Security Guard : No, I have a Taser.
Mackenzie Murphy : Bitch, I hope you brought two, 'cause mama's got a real high tolerance.