Vice (I) (2018)

Jesse Plemons: Kurt

Photos 

Quotes 

• Kurt : [Narrating]  As the world becomes more and more confusing, we tend to focus on the things that are right there in front of us. While ignoring the massive forces that actually change and shape our lives. And, with people working longer and longer hours, for less and less, when we do have free time, the last thing we want is complicated analysis of our government, lobbying, international trade agreements, and tax bills. So it's no surprise that when a monotone bureaucratic Vice President came to power, we hardly noticed as he achieved a position of authority that very few leaders in the history of America ever have. Forever changing the course of history for millions and millions of lives. And he did it like a ghost. With most people having no idea who he is or where he came from.

• Donald Rumsfeld : [carrying two drinks]  They gave me the keys to the damn palace! Chief of Staff.

  Dick Cheney : Holy shit! You salty son of a bitch. You did it.

  [glasses clink] 

  Donald Rumsfeld : All right, we have work to do. Kissinger is trying to kiss and make up with the Soviets.

  Dick Cheney : Well, let's make sure that shit doesn't happen.

  Donald Rumsfeld : [laughing]  Yeah.

  [cut to oval office meeting] 

  Dick Cheney : [to president Ford]  If I may, I believe I may have a way to put an oar in the water, on Russia. What if... we create...

  Henry Kissinger : [interrupts]  Mr. President.

  Gerald Ford : Come on Henry, let's hear Dick out.

  Kurt : [narration]  One of Dick Cheney's special super powers, was the ability to make the most wild and extreme ideas sound measured and professional.

  Dick Cheney : What if on a unilateral basis, we all put miniature wigs on our penises and we walked out to the White House lawn, and jerked each other off. So, like a puppet show, but much more enjoyable?

  Henry Kissinger : Hmmm... I do like a good puppet show.

  Gerald Ford : I say we do it.

  Reporter : Henry Kissinger has been relieved as National Security Adviser and replaced by Brent Scowcroft.

  Reporter 2 : They're calling it the Halloween Massacre.

  Henry Kissinger : Mr President.

  Gerald Ford : Hold on, Henry.

  Reporter 3 : Donald Rumsfeld has replaced Secretary of Defense James Schlesinger.

  Reporter 4 : [cut to the chief of staff's office]  And Dick Cheney has been chosen, as the...

  Lynne Cheney : Youngest Chief of Staff in history! It's amazing. It's a dream.

• Kurt : [narration]  And as the new Chief of Staff and with the Presidency weakened by Watergate, Dick Cheney wanted to find out exactly how much power did the President have.

  Dick Cheney : I would like to reinstate Executive Authority... How?

  Kurt : Antonin Scalia, a young lawyer with the justice department who would later go on to serve on the Supreme Court, rocked Dick's world.

  Antonin Scalia : Interesting you should ask. Are you familiar with the theory of the unitary executive?

  Dick Cheney : No. Tell me about it.

  Antonin Scalia : Uh... it is an interpretation that few like myself happen to believe, in Article II of the Constitution that vests the President with absolute executive authority. And I mean absolute.

  Kurt : [...]  The Unitary Executive Theory. Certain legal scholars believed that, if the President does anything it must be legal, because it's the President. To hell with checks and balances, especially during times of war. This was the power of kings, pharaohs, dictators.

  Dick Cheney : This is perfect.

  [dryly chuckles] 

  Kurt : Dick Cheney was a foot soldier in the power games of Washington DC. But with the Unitary Executive Theory, he could become Galactus, devourer of planets. But then, it was election night. And there was one big problem...

  Barbara Walters : [television broadcast]  the winner with two hundred and seventy two electoral votes... we have wondered which of us gonna make this announcement James Earl Carter, the next President of the United States.

  Kurt : And just like that... it was all over.

  Barbara Walters : Dick Cheney, the president's chief of staff, ah... he does not have a job. At one point, he was a broker

  [overlapping dialogue] 

  Lynne Cheney : It can't be. It's got to be some sort of a mistake, or miscalculation.

  Donald Rumsfeld : There goes the neighborhood.

  Gerald Ford : Well... thank you all.

  Reporter : The Republicans have lost the Presidency. They are the minority in Congress in most states. With America demanding change...

  Reporter 2 : The GOP is a party in disarray. Clearly Watergate, the Vietnam war...

• George Bush Sr. : Dick, I just wanted to say thank you for getting the House not to override the President's veto the fairness doctrine.

  Dick Cheney : Not a problem. Happy to get rid of any big government regulations.

  George Bush Sr. : Thank you. Great.

  [freeze frame] 

  Kurt : [narration]  The fairness doctrine was a law from the forties that required any broadcast TV, or radio news to present both sides of an issue equally. Its repeal would lead to the rise of opinion news.

  Morton Downey Jr : [smash cut]  Let me tell you something, you skinny, human prophylactic.

  Rush Limbaugh : [split edits]  Love is the only human emotion that you can't fake except women, and thank God they can.

  News Anchor : [hard cut]  And eventually to the realization of Roger Aile's dream. FOX news, which would go on to become the number one news station in the United States and swing America even more to the right.

  [signal ends]