Reviews

A long time ago, in a....

This movie also starts out with some scrolling text, too bad it takes nearly five minutes. On the positive side, when the text finishes, you could save yourself about 90 minutes of anguish and walk out. This film definitely will challenge "Plan 9 From Outer Space" as the worst horror movie ever made. The biggest difference between the movie and video game is the reset button. I kept looking for one in the theatre. You'd expect second rate acting from Tara Reid but not Christian Slater or Stephen Dorff. The love scene, if you could call it one (I don't remember any love scenes in the game)has successfully set lovemaking back 1000 years. Congratulations Uwe Boll with continuing the fine tradition of B-Movie making. Ed would have been proud.

Previously, I thought that the worst film Nicole Eggert(Charles in Charge)ever made was Blown Away with Corey Haim (Silver Bullet, The Lost Boys).

But that was until I watched Decoys, (Toronto will never be the same for me). First I though it was an Ed Wood flick in color, but even Ed would not have done this one. It was so dull, boring and senseless, even the scantily clad babes didn't save it. I kept waiting for Vincent Price or Peter Cushing to make an entrance. And I did pray, for it to finally end.

Although this picture is more suited for the Comedy channel, this (non)horror/(non)sci-fi movie soon makes it's debut on the SCI-FI channel. Tune in to something else, you won't regret missing this one.

Another film adaptation of Stephen King's masterpiece 'Salem's Lot, one of the scariest novels ever written. Presented by TNT as a two part mini-series.

Ben Mears returned to ‘Salems Lot, the small New England town where he was born, hoping to write the novel that just might put to rest what had happened to him as a boy in the old Marsten House. Unfortunately, Richard Straker and Kurt Barlow had other ideas.

A bit different than the 1979 version, mainly due to modern computer generated enhancements and Peter Filardi's loosely adapted teleplay.

Comparing the two mini-series, neither followed the book closely, although Tobe Hooper's earlier version was the scarier. Rob Lowe was more believable as Ben Mears than David Soul, but neither Lance Kerwin nor Dan Byrd fit the book's impish image of 11 year old Mark Petrie. Donald Sutherland's Richard K. Straker character never had a chance to develop, but it could never have compared to James Mason's portrayal, he was much more sinister.

The second part was filled with great performances by the cast and fantastic special effects and was far more enjoyable to watch with Rutger Hauer as vampire Kurt Barlow, while James Cromwell as Father Callahan gave the best performance.

Rod Serling was a writer's writer. His adaptations were genius in the purest sense.

The Twilight Zone (CBS, 1959-64) stands as the role model for TV anthologies. It was a springboard that launched the careers of many now famous stars. His ideas were not only entertaining, but a great way to get television audiences thinking about social issues of the era. By far, the best episode was the original pilot, which was rejected by CBS, "The Time Element": What if a man from 1958 kept waking up in Hawaii on Dec. 6, 1941, the day before the bombing of Pearl Harbor? What if he tried to warn everybody of the coming disaster? And what if nobody listened?

Thanks to the courage of the Westinghouse-Desilu Playhouse, which finally aired the Time Element in 1958, CBS could no longer ignore the enormous viewer response and ordered a new pilot from Mr. Serling, entitled "Where Is Everybody?". The result was 138 30 minute episodes, 18 60 minute episodes (in 1963), Night Gallery, Twilight Zone the movie, second (1985-1989) and third (2002-2003) generation productions of the series. The genius of Rod Serling will endure forever.



Submitted For Your Approval.

Spend a couple of hours with the Griswold, oops, I mean Johnson family as they take to the road for their family reunion.

Cedric the Entertainer supplies the laughs, all seven of them. A sexy female traveler inciting marital tension, being given the wrong car at the dealership, unkempt rural relatives, we've seen it all before.

But what might be the funniest thing of all about this predictable remake of National Lampoon's Vacation is that (Lil') Bow Wow has a higher billing than Vanessa Williams.

But the fact remains that if you are looking for about 90 minutes of profanity free family entertainment which, by the way, is becoming harder and harder to find these days, then maybe The Johnson Family Vacation is just what the doctor ordered.

Check out the 1937 version starring Shirley Temple, you won't be disappointed!

This movie's claim to fame: On November 17, 1968, the New York Jets led the Oakland Raiders 32-29, with 50 seconds to go. It was the end of the hour, and even though the score was close, NBC switched over to the movie Heidi. In the next 42 seconds, Oakland scored two touchdowns to win 43-32. As a result, all NFL contests are now televised to their conclusion.

Always Remember That I Love You is a moving story of a boy's battle to rediscover his true identity in the face of horrific consequences; and how his strength to carry on helps him to confront the ultimate emotional dilemma of a young man. Superbly played by Stephen Dorff, Robert discovers at the age of 16 that he was adopted. His parents, played by Joan Van Ark and David Birney, find out that their adopted son was actually kidnapped from his real parents. They decide to tell him the truth, even at the risk of losing him. Robert runs away to find his real family. He eventually finds them and is able to become a part of the family without revealing who he is. Eventually, he must decide where he belongs.

If you are expecting the Stephen King novel, you may be disappointed.

King's 1999 book "Hearts of Atlantis" features five stories, including the generally praised "Low Men in Yellow Coats." It forms the heart of this movie, which also dips into the fifth story called "Heavenly Shades of Night Are Falling."

The film tells a tale of 1960, when a man named Ted Brautigan moves into Bobby Garfield's neighborhood in tiny Harwich, Connecticut. Bobby is impressed with the old man, as are his friends Carol Gerber and Sully-John. Bobby's Mom, Liz, has her own ideas about Ted, all of which become darker as the summer of 1960 wears on. Starring Anthony Hopkins, Anton Yelchin, Hope Davis and David Morse, the movie never develops any kind of momentum or energy to propel it forward - it often seems to be spinning its wheels. But at least the popcorn was freshly popped!

"A.I." is based on a short story called "Super-Toys Last All Summer" by science fiction author Brian Aldiss. Haley Joel Osment is absolutely amazing as David, a futuristic Pinocchio, that has been programmed by Professor Hobby (William Hurt), to love humans. David is adopted as a test case by a Cybertronics employee (Sam Robards) and his reluctant wife (Frances O'Connor), whose own terminally ill child has been frozen cryogenically until a cure for his disease is found. David becomes part of the family just in time for the couple's own son, Martin (Jake Thomas), to return home in good health. After Monica reads the boys the story of Pinocchio, a forlorn David wishes for the Blue Fairy to grant him mortality. And the adventure begins.

The movie's special effects are awesome, combine the brillance of Kubrick and the magic of Spielberg, AI is a must see for all Sci-Fi fans.

As in The Lost World, this movie takes place at the Isla Sorna. Instead of Goldblum, JP3 brings back Sam Neill as the slightly grizzled Dr. Alan Grant who seems happy to put his terrifying up-close dino experiences behind him. But running out of funding and an offer of "What would it take to get you to be our guide", has him heading back to monster island. The plot is a little thin, how 14 year old Eric Kirby (Trevor Morgan's first stint with dinosaurs was Barney's Great Adventure), could survive 2 months alone on an island of man eaters is a mystery , but the dinosaurs are phenomenal. I didn't think anything could defeat a T-Rex. The computer generated or mechanical creatures are so life-like,(although one of the dino fight scenes looks like a remake of something out of One Million, B.C.), you can almost buy into the illusion that they are real. Throw in a little comic relief at the right moments, JP3 is an exciting, enjoyable way to spend about 90 minutes this summer.

A superb cast consisting of Roddy McDowell as young Huw, Donald Crisp and Sara Allgood as Mr. and Mrs. Morgan, Maurenn O'Hara as his sister Angharad and Walter Pidgeon as Mr. Gruffydd, town minister.

Sixty year old Huw Morgan looks back at his life as a boy in a small Welch mining town. Life was harsh with the brutal conditions of the coal mine and the treatment of the workers by the company. His remembrances reveal the disintegration of his close knit family, while capturing the intimacies and issues of their time.

This acclaimed screen classic is one of Twentieth Century Fox's 20 great films of the 20th century, and is one of my favorites, as it will be yours after viewing.

For anyone who had a dog for their friend as a child, this is a must see film.

In Willie Morris' remembrance of his boyhood friend Skip, strong performances are given by Frankie Muniz as Morris, Luke Wilson as Dink Jenkins and Diane Lane as Willie's mom, Ellen. And in a surprisingly different role for Kevin Bacon as Willie's dad, Jack Morris, Mr. Bacon's versatility as an actor truly shines.

The trials and tribulations of a young boy growing up in the Mississippi during World War II, My Dog Skip will let you remember, make you laugh, and probably have you shed a tear or two in the end.

A wonderful adaptation of Joel Chandler Harris'"Tales of Uncle Remus". This film was the first to employ live action with animated sequences, a feat not equaled until "Mary Poppins" in 1965. A story of a young boy's attempt to deal with his parents impending divorce, by escaping into the fantasy world of Brer Rabbit, Fox and Bear, while learning some valuable lessons during his journeys.

Unfortunately, this movie is not available on home video, as it was never released in the U.S. due to heavy opposition from various political groups.

An made for TV movie with wonderful performances by Hume Cronyn and Fred Savage. Trevor(Savage) moves to a new city and has trouble with the adjustment. When visiting the libary for some research work, he meets a homeless man(Cronyn)and reacts the way most act towards the homeless. But soon the memory of Trevor's grandfather surfaces and he looks at Cronyn differently. He disregards Clive's appearance and begins to appreciate the man for his knowledge. A friendship and bond soon forms. With Christmas fast approaching and a storm on the way, Trevor soon learns about the plight of the homeless and the hopelessness they face.