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TedEBear
Reviews
Black Books (2000)
An absolute scream!
Usually, I tend to avoid "horrible people being horribly horrible to each other yet somehow horribly remain horrible friends" sitcoms but this one is hilarious. Somehow, the main trio are relatable and the situations truly, wonderfully bizarre.
Pulp Fiction (1994)
Disappointing all the way around
After having seen how "Pulp Fiction" has infiltrated its way into current pop culutre (the dance contest, Royale with cheese, etc.), I finally got a chance to see the movie from the beginning and couldn't believe what a huge letdown it was. There was nothing for me to grasp to make me care about what the characters were doing and why they were doing it, and the overly gratuitous use of the f-bombs put me off completely. It's almost as if swearing was substituted for wit and clever dialogue. I felt like Tarantino was trying to impress me with how much of a movie geek he is, but if he tried to make a movie with an engaging story, I might have liked it more. The only person he's impressing is himself, and it isn't working.
33 1/3 Revolutions Per Monkee (1969)
Huh?
I would have given this a 1, but the most of the Monkees' performances saved it.
What they did with "33 1/3 Revolutions" was done better in "Head". While "33 1/3 Revolutions" had some great music (most notably Peter's keyboard solo and "Listen to the Band"), the story was muddled and less comprehensible. I fast-forwarded through much of this, usually whenever "the wizard" came on and started babbling about whatever. Even the 50's medley was a bit painful to watch.
I understood what they were trying to get at but it just felt like it had "contractual obligation" written all over it, nobody really putting in any effort to make it a better program. Considering the Monkees' history, however, they were probably glad when the entire ordeal was over.
Napoleon Dynamite (2004)
Most of the "good" bits are in the trailers
I honestly didn't know what to expect when I finally watched this. I'd heard so many good things about it and was completely disappointed. Everybody seemed to be acting in a really bad school play, just reciting their lines at each other; nobody closed their mouths - they just stood there, slack-jawed and staring at each other; and above all, I just couldn't connect with anybody. I've heard people going on and on about "oh, it's a great character piece" but what happens when I don't like any of the characters on the screen? And the dialog seemed designed to be on t-shirts, greeting cards, and posters. Which is where it all ended up. What a surprise: it's an MTV movie. Marketing for marketing's sake.
Little Voice (1998)
Little voice, big disappointment
*POSSIBLE SPOILERS* After all the glowing reviews, I finally had the chance to watch the DVD. Jane Horrocks' performance was stunning, but the rest of the movie didn't keep up with her. The "free bird" metaphor wasn't presented as much as it was beat over the audience's heads at least four times. Okay, we get it: find your own voice, break out, take a chance, blah blah blah. Unfortunately, the heavy-handed nature of the metaphor broadcast the ending so it was incredibly unsatisfying. I found myself following the dots, pretty much predicting the high points before they happened. Overall, it didn't live up to what I was expecting.
Tabitha (1976)
Meh...
Like a few others, I was disappointed with the series. I was hoping it would live up to "Bewitched" but there really wasn't anything to set it apart from the other bland sitcoms surrounding it. Aunt Minerva really seemed like a tired retread of Endora with a smattering of Aunt Clara or Esmerelda, and Adam substituting for Durweed...Dogwood...Darrin seemed pointless (apparently, continuity wasn't considered. Maybe they thought the younger audience they were shooting for wouldn't have noticed or watched the original series?) The only thing it had going for it was the theme song. While Lisa Hartman was a decent choice for the role physically, it looked like her main direction was "pretend you're Elizabeth Montgomery playing Samantha". Overall, the show didn't feel very original.
The Muppets' Wizard of Oz (2005)
Needs a lot of work
It might have been (over) familiarity with the subject matter, but I'm another who felt this could have been a lot better. Ashanti didn't really seem to "connect" with the Muppets in a way other performers have accomplished in the past; on their show and in their movies, you thought Steve Martin or Ruth Buzzi were actually talking to other actors. Here, Ashanti seemed to be talking to decorated lumps of felt and feathers. The Quentin Tarantino bit seemed like it was dropped in as an afterthought, only because he really likes the Muppets and wanted to tell his friends he made an appearance in a Muppet production. Overall, it just seemed to lack the character and spark I've come to expect from the Muppets.
The Evil Dead (1981)
When does it get interesting?
About the only thing that separates it from the rest of the
friends-get-stranded-and-killed movies is the Book of the Dead plot. Otherwise, I got the idea of it, even though I fast forwarded through the majority. I'm not sure if I'm going to move on to the sequels; nothing about this movie compels me to do so. The ending, trying not to give away any spoilers, just leaves it hanging open with no resolution and makes it too obvious that it wants a sequel. I'm not even sure if I can qualify it for its perceived "camp" value; dull, flat acting from four of the five cast members, weak special effects (yeah, yeah, yeah. I know: it was made in 1981! What did you expect? "The Matrix"), a storyline that was new at the time, but I've seen at least 100 times before and 1000 times
better. * of ****
Velvet Goldmine (1998)
Unimpressive
While the movie certainly looked (okay, okay, "New York City" obviously isn't) and sounded good, the story and characters left me flat. Nobody really hooked me or made me care about them, which is important when telling a story. It just seemed to be more interested in spouting faux mysticism of the era, rather than trying to tie it all together and telling me a cohesive story.
Elvira's Haunted Hills (2001)
How's she do it?
Most of the jokes are older than the Carpathian hills, but they're delivered with such verve and glee, I couldn't help but laugh! Cassandra Peterson continues to deliver with one of the more unique characters in TV and film history, this time in a heart-felt tribute to the horror movies of the 50's and 60's that helped launch her career. The entire cast really got into their parts, delivering worthy performances and adding to the atmosphere of fun. Too bad this didn't get more wide-spread distribution; hopefully, the word of mouth from pay-per-view and home video will help.
Hedwig and the Angry Inch (2001)
Great music, fair script
Too bad the story didn't have as much heart and soul as the music. It was a decent idea but it got bogged down in Hedwig's personal tragedies. The ending was just too trite and pat for my tastes, as well. After all the hype, I'd expected more.
Chuck & Buck (2000)
Unpleasant. Unnerving. Unnecessary.
After hearing so many glowing reviews, I was surprised how unpleasant this movie was. Unpleasant in a bad way. I did NOT find Buck to be all that endearing; I found him to be a really creepy jerk. I was not charmed by his arrested adolescence. I did not feel sorry for him because his affection for Chuck was not returned in kind. Yes, I've been in his situation, but I've never stalked anybody or insinuated myself into their lives. I found nothing to like about this movie.
Self Portrait (1988)
A sheer delight
Buy the tape or DVD. Give Bill Plympton your money. Encourage him to make more movies. Unfortunately, the commentary on the DVD drags--it's obvious he's reading from a script--but the accompanying documentaries provide the same insight and background information (skip the "Screw" interview, however; the host is more interested in telling his own stories than listening to Mr. Plympton).
Daria (1997)
Too damn smart for its own good, like its title character
It's too bad they had to cancel "Daria", but it seemed to come to a natural conclusion. I thought the show was witty and downright caustic, but it maintained a distinct personality you just don't find in very many animated shows on TV these days. It was a program MTV could actually be proud of and should look upon fondly.
Psycho Beach Party (2000)
Surf's up, dood!
I wasn't too surprised when this movie hit direct-to-video, but it's an undiscovered gem! It parodies without being vulgar and stretches to excess, but has loads of laughs along the way. Too bad the timing was off for the release of this movie.
The Women (1939)
Ladies...
...opposite corners, come out claws unsheathed, teeth bared, and wits sharpened.
It must have been difficult to make this movie and keep it balanced without the cast trying to upstage each other all the time. However, everybody is given the perfect opportunity to shine; you even (kind of) feel sorry for Joan Crawford at the end when she's received her come-uppance (but you still can't resist the urge to point at her and go "neener neener neener, ha, ha, you lost!") Norma Shearer starts out a little slowly, but that's only part of her character.
One of those perfectly cast films you'd hate to see remade. (Should also be required viewing for women's studies classes as an historical record on how women's identities have changed over the years.)
Heavy Metal 2000 (2000)
A disappointing mess
After all the surrounding hype that built this one up, I was really, really let down. While the original was uneven in parts due to its anthology nature, it at least had great animation and an excellent soundtrack to hold it up. "Heavy Metal 2000" had a predictable, weak, suspense-free story, and the combo animation didn't mesh together very well. Heck, the traditional cel animation wasn't done very well, either; the shadowing was off and proportions weren't properly held when a character was turning. The colors were as dull and flat as the personalities of the characters.
And why is it the female non-humanoid aliens look like somebody just drew an alien head on a humanoid female body?
Thoroughly Modern Millie (1967)
Kind of a drag
I'd have to agree that this one seems a little too long. It was nice, however, to see Mary Tyler Moore dancing in a role other than Laura Petrie on "The Dick Van Dyke Show". Carol Channing's numbers seemed like they were added just for the sake of adding Carol Channing to the cast, weighing down the film in the process. The whole movie was a good idea that just didn't seem to come together properly, in the end.
L'homme est une femme comme les autres (1998)
Not exactly a mess...
...but not exactly even-keeled, "Man is a Woman" didn't really solve any of its philosophical ideas or storylines. It tried to bring up how one man balances being gay and Jewish by having him marry for a bribe. It tried to show how a Reform Jewish family and an Orthodox Jewish family comes together to celebrate their children's wedding. It tried to show a gay man living in a straight man's world. It tried to show the myriad differences between men and women, and how they view relationships. It tried to show all of these things, but came up short on all counts. Maybe it had too many elements to hash out, and the writer(s) simply couldn't come up with plausible/logical conclusions?
Then there are the storylines: Simon's obvious love for his cousin David; Simon and Rosalie's marriage; Simon's marrying for a bribe. None of these were satisfactorily resolved. Because the philosophical ideas were all over the map, the stories couldn't be concluded, either. Most disappointing was Simon and Rosalie's marriage; there was no real conflict there, outside of the tension within her family (which, by the way, was neatly and quickly resolved, then thrown out the window as an afterthought). Rosalie suddenly gives up without really confronting the source of her discomfort--Simon. Thankfully, this wasn't really played up as a standard "gay man gets married and, through the love of a good woman, goes straight", but it turned in that direction (phooey). And since there really weren't any provisions attached when Simon's uncle first made his offer, I wasn't really surprised when he announced to Simon's mother he'd only pay after the birth of Simon and Rosalie's first child (I was expecting something more extreme, such as the child's 18th birthday). Then there was the scene where Simon was rehearsing what he wanted to say to his cousin David; having been there, I understand the preparation and tension involved, but this it went nowhere in this movie. It seems to have been inserted as an afterthought, as if to show Simon in a less-than favorable light (I thought he was more contemptable for having accepted his uncle's bribe).
Overall, it seems this was three separate storylines that were forceably woven together. There were a few enjoyable moments but nothing really to recommend it to others.
The Wizard of Speed and Time (1988)
Boo, hoo, hoo, poor little me...
With all the hoopla I'd heard about this movie before its release, I was expecting a lot more. Instead, I was treated to a pity party thrown by the guest of honor. I was told it was going to be an expanded version of the short of the same name, so I was expecting that. Instead, I got a movie on how tough it is to break into show business, and how the little guy always gets trod upon and ground into the dirt by the bigwigs. Please. I've seen that done 100 times before and 1,000 times better. There was little to engage me; it wasn't "The Wizard of Speed and Time", but "The Making of 'The Wizard of Speed and Time'."
The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)
Actually, a very keen spoof
After having seen this over 30 times in theatres, I've seen it an equal number of times on home video and DVD. The thing that strikes me the most about this movie is the parody involved. It's a wonderful parody of the monster and rock 'n' roll movies from the 50's and 60's, thrown together with the burgeoning sexual revolution that was growing in the movies during the early 70's. It also makes a statement about how things aren't always as black and white as many people would like to believe. Richard O'Brien's music and script are inspired lunacy, and the cast give memorable performances, especially Tim Curry. His facial expressions are simply amazing and help add dimension (dementia?) to everybody's favorite transvestite. One of my favorite overall scenes from a movie appears in RHPS: during the close of "I'm Going Home", when Frank steps between the kleig light and the camera, so that he's in silhouette, singing the final line. (sigh!) Even though I can recite most of the dialogue from memory, this movie continues to be one of my overall favorites.
The State (1993)
Completely devoid of humor
For some reason, I sat through every episode of this series, hoping against hope that maybe I'd laugh just once. I did, during the hormone sketch. For the myriad other sketches, I just sat and watched them. I found this series to be double plus unfunny, trying too hard to push an envelope that really doesn't exist any more. There was no sarcasm, no satire, no parody, no wit, essential elements in comedy and humor. Other people found it funny, and that's up to them. I, for one, have tried to see what the deal was and just couldn't.
Valley of the Dolls (1967)
Vapid, insipid trash. What's NOT to love?
Heavily edited between original book and final screenplay, VOTD still brings new depths to scenery chewing, cat fights, and glahmoor. BIG hair clashes with BIG egos as dialogue runs the gamut from whispered sincerity to bellowed anguish to shrieked disdain. Lessons are learned, vodka is drained, and dolls are abused to wake you up, put you to sleep, and help you get over the fact you signed the contract to do this movie and there's no way out. Your head will spin over how quickly and easily Barbara Parkins gets through her ordeals (any explanations gladly accepted!), yet meeting a Barbra Streisand lookalike sends Patty Duke off the wagon. SWOON over a soundtrack that sounds like it might have been written the night before filming started! GASP as Sharon Tate's character gets involved in nudie films that are a sight better than this one! LAUGH as you watch the Dance of Patty Duke's Necklace! THINK as you see why Judy Garland bailed when she had the chance! Everybody! On the count of three! One, two, three! NEEEEEELLLLLYYYYYY O'HAAAARRRRAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
L'Atlantide (1932)
Something missing?
While "Mistress of Atlantis" was rather moody and atmospheric, I can't help shake the feeling that parts of the original French novel weren't filmed or chunks of the finished product had been edited out. Too many unanswered questions were left.
The Ritz (1976)
I'VE BEEN THERE!!!
I've been in places like this on nights like this! I can SWEAR that stuff like this actually happens!
Some friends showed this to me, just to see my reaction to it. I'd read the play, so Treat Williams' voice wasn't too much of a surprise. However, F. Murray Abraham answering the phone pretty much induced oxygen deprivation, I laughed so hard! It's not really meant to provide any great insight on "the gay lifestyle", but it shows that whatever your propensity, a well-paced screwball bedroom farce is hard to come by.