Reviews

I will be the first person to stand up and admit that Pumpkinhead is, in some ways, as silly as it's name, but there's something there. It's just enough to elevate this above much of the other "Dead Teenager" dreck that was thrown at us in the glorious eighties.

First off, the monster is a doozy. Stan Winston was up to his usual standard of excelence and creativity, and he created a creature that, while not actually convincing, is alot scarier and easier to enjoy than most. Pumpkinhead is no Freddy or Michael Meyers, but he delivers.

Second of all, the plot is more intelligent than I have come to expect from slasher flicks. The "Kids" are more thought out than most disposable teens, and their motives are more understandable. They accidently take the life of a child, but most want to do the right thing and go to the authorities. Even the Jerk who doesn't is eventually persuaded. And Harley, the father who is the real hero AND villian of the film is much more human than his actions would suggest.

There is also a good twist at the end which I will not reveal here, only say that surprised me with it's subtlety, which is something you rarely see in a horror film that is more than 2/3 done.

Bottom line, I was pleasently surprised with Pumpkinhead. People who don't like horror films are unlikely to be impressed with it, except on a technical level because the effects and atmosphere are superb, but horror fans looking for a harmless new thrill may find it better than expected. It's smarter, wittier and deeper than the norm.

Pumpkinhead gets 6 out of 10 for technical expertise, great atmosphere and an above average story.

The Shawshank Redemption is a film about people, which is becoming increasingly rare these days where movies merely showcase special effects or action.

The film seems slow but that is the point. It must convey the slow passage of time, as we see Andy and Red lives in the prison. Its a film that makes us think as well as feel, and that is what makes it truly great.

Tim Robbins' performance is incredible, making Andy out to be a complete person with real thoughts and feelings. He IS Andy, not simply an actor going through the motions. He is the film's heart.

And That make's Morgan Freeman's Red it's soul. It is his point of view that carries us through the film, making Andy seem even more mysterious because he is never quite sure what Andy is up to.

A Wonderful film that suceeds on so many levels. A must see for anyone, even if you don't think you will like a film about prison that is so long and may seem slow. See it anyway! It earns its place on the top 250 list with heart and style. We watched it in a sociology class and it is the only movie I have ever seen that has a climax capible of moving an entire room full of jaded college students to standing ovation. A true masterpiece!

PS: In one of the scenes on the bus (I forget if it is when Brooks or Red gets out) a woman with short reddish curly hair can be seen (At least in widescreen) She was my math teacher in high school, and most of the movie was filmed around my hometown of Mansfield. I just felt like mentioning this.

Ah, I remember the good old days. 1988 it was, I was a little kid and had just been taken to see a great movie called Land Before Time. I really enjoyed it and wanted to see more of the cute talking dinos. Be careful what you wish for! Each sequel to the film has degenerated farther and farther from the original nice story into pure theatrical sludge. The characters have become increasingly more annoying, the plots are trite, the songs make you pray for the ice age and those are the series's GOOD points.

As for this latest cinematic suppository, I can't help but say, in all honesty, that I would rather be castrated with a rusty pizza cutter then sit through it again. Five minutes of Land Before Time VIII can turn your brain into cottage cheese. This is the worst case of sequelitus I have ever seen.

It's high time these dinosaurs became extinct!

Although I have to concede with the critics that this film is a bit pointless and stupid, it also contains enough good gags to make it worthwhile.

It's true that some of the lines seem to be trying for a cheap and easy laugh, and that the climax was clearly written by someone who wanted to get the film over with, Repossessed is still pleasing to watch and worth a rental if you find it at your local video store (although it wont be easy, this film seems that have fallen into the movie limbo that contains other good but not great comedies like The Wrong Guys and Shock Treatment).

I think that this films only real problem is that it has such a limited audience. You have to be the sort of person who likes both The Exorcist and Leslie Nielson to really get this one, and those are two areas that don't intersect much. Despite the painfully lame moments that occur sporadically the movie holds up well and deserves a higher rating.

My view: six out of ten.

In a word: Awesome.

Spawn has long since been one of my favorite comic books and this film combines all of it's best features. The special effects alone make this worth a peek for anyone interested in film making but there is a good story behind all of it as well. Clown's crude humor can make you laugh, and some of the more infernal scenes can make you jump but really this is a plain and simple action film, which pulls no punches and make no appologies. The Spawn effects are absolutely stunning and the atmosphere is a gripping sort of "Techno-Decadence".

If I have one complaint about Spawn, it is that despite all of the mournful wailing about Wanda and the prevalent romantic sub plot, you never really sympathize with any of the characters. The premise of the film is such that you really wish that all this plot-matter would be dropped, and you could have more action. Believe me, I am always the first one to complain about a film exchanging story for fighting but in Spawn it really doesnt work.

Rating: a straightforward A for the awesome special effects and great action.

Although this film can't really compare with the origional Mortal Kombat, it's still a fun film.

The one problem I have with this one is that too many of the scenes could only be understood by a fan of the games. I am one but I got a little tired of answering such questions as these (with answers to help the fan impared):

"What are these robots here for?" Cyrax, Smoke and Sektor are robots out to get subzero for betraying his clan. To fit them in this film they were reprogrammed to go after our heroes.

"Who was that chick in the pink who looked like Kitana and attacked Sonya?" That was Mileena, Kitana's Evil Twin.

"What about that thing with the blades and the severe need for an orthodontist?" Baraka. A freaky weirdo from the games who is never really explained

"And the Shao-Kahn's four cronies?" The red guy is Ermac, a somewhat enigmatic fighter for Mortal Kombat 3

The purple one is Rain. A weather controlling ninja who is killed before doing anything cool in this film.

The 4-armed freak is Sheeva. Sindel's shokan guardian thought up by taking a hindu god, giving it a sex change and mis-spelling its name

The centaur is Motaro, a sub-boss from the games who's species hate's Sheeva's species.

"Who is Nightwolf?" An indian who really kicks butt in the games

"What is this animality crapola?" A type of fatality from the game in which you turn into an animal and kick butt

My one real problem with this film is that fact that Christopher Lambert and Bridgette Wilson seem to have been replaced. Why?

Rating: A-

When I heard that a movie was to be made from the video game Mortal Kombat my reaction was one of dread. After sitting through the movie versions of "Super Mario Brothers" and "Street Fighter" I was beginning to feel that vid-game movies were something of a lost cause.

I was wrong.

This movie is Spectacular! The acting was good, the fighting was realistic (rare in any movie, particulary a fantasy one) and the story was Fantastic. The special effects department for this one deserves a medal.

Mortal Kombat has always been one of my favorite video game series because there is a story behind all of the fighting and it's actually based on real mythology. The characters are interesting, from Scorpion to Sub-Zero and there are pretty girls as well.

This movie is a true classic in my opinion and will be famous for years to come.

Grade: the long coveted A+.

I would call this movie horible but that would leave no word to describe the cast. An hour of watching this film is the equivelant of 17 hours in a more enjoyable activity like eye surgery.

Wait...whats that up in the sky! A bird? A plane? A nuclear missile mercifully coming to blow up my television? Nope! It's the Satelite of Love! Hooray!

Despite having a plot so wooden that it attracts termites, despite the characters that are undoubtedly laboring at gas-stations now (or better yet, at the local EAT) and despite the music that turns your brain to cheese, Mike, Servo and Crow save the day once again.

In this movie a girl named Michelle trys to escape a life of boredom runs off with a Regis Philbin look-alike and a poetic folk singer wannabe to become a gogo-dancer. Then she gets mixed up in drugs and stuff but at this point my screams of pain drowned out most of the talking so I got kinda lost.

This is a terrible movie but MST3K works well with it.

Though, in the strictest sense, this is a bad movie, it isn't as bad as some the the stinkers that I watch on MST3K and its foreign, so I will put it down to cultural differences. I'm of Russian descent myself so I feel I have a right to be critical of it.

That said, this movie makes an interesting fairy tale and is tolerable by itself, though I personally wouldn't watch it without the ample help of Mike, Servo and Crow. It is so full of obviously botched translations, unsubtle over-acting and screwed-up characters that I found that even our friends on the satelite of love couldn't think of all the jokes that a movie like this attracts.

The plot (such as it is) centers around a pretty russian girl with a stepmother and sister that just stepped right out of cinderella. Throw in a gang of bumbling theives, a hansel and gretel style witch and an attempt at a prince charming and you have this movie. The actual story is a take on of a classic russian fairy-tale about a nice girl (who is clearly a jinx, as the hecklers point out) who befriends Jack Frost and is rewarded. It's rather silly and exagerated but not entirely lame.

Though probably not worth the bother without the MST3K gang, i give this movie a grudging 4. The MST3K version rates a 10 as it is one of my favorite episodes.

This is a great movie that managed to keep me entertained all thorugh it. Fox is great and convincing and funny all at the same time. The ghosts; Stuart and Cyrus really add necesary laughs and the grim reaper effects are very cool. Frank's crooked 'Ghostbuster' scheme is clever and the plot rocks. I recomend this to anyone looking for a good laugh or a quick scare. This film can definitly provide both. I also like Dhamers character. He is amusing in a pathetic way and the way he dies is weird. This films climax in the hospital where the murders took place, complete with "Claudia Style" flashbacks is very effective and thrilling.

Grade: I give this movie an A.

When I first heard that another sequel to Childs Play was forthcoming my reaction was something along the lines of "OH NO!" Because lets face it, the third one wasnt very good and after a ten year break theres bound to be a few problems with the film. I was wrong. Chucky returns with great force and really makes this movie a memorable one. Its creative and origional. Tiffany is particularly effective in bringing this film to life. There is even a bit of humor in this one, such as Tiffany using "Voo-doo for Dummies" to bring Chucky back to life and saying that her hero is Martha Stewart. There are a couple of problems with the movie, such as the whole magic amulet thing which was never mentioned in the previous movies. According to the ones before he has to possess the first one to realize what he is, meaning that he should have been after either Tiffany, that guy she was with or (shudder) Andy Barclay again. To me the saving grace of Bride of Chucky is that we are finally past the Andy stage of the series. This movie is cool though I still think Childs Play II was the best.

Movie Rating: A- for generalized coolness.

I like this movie, not only because it is suspensful and thrilling but also because it has an accuracy not usually seen in horror films. The whole story has some startling similarities to real cases that have been researched by the Society for Psycical Research (SPR) and the hypnotism is very realistic. The acting is good and the story is gripping. I recomend it for anyone whos interested in ghosts, hypnotism and other weird stuff and who'd also like to see a great move wth lots of scenes that will make you jump.

Grade: I give it a A for great writing and directing.

I admit, I was cautious. I didn't think this would be very good. I basically thought it would be a completely stupid cash in on a classic film seiries. I was wrong. This IS a classic. Maddona is perfect as Breathless Mahony and Beaty does a great job as Tracy. But the real prize goes to Al Pacino who makes the role of Al "Bigboy" Caprice a classic homage to the old gangster style and makes this film definetly worth a peek. As an old fan of the tracy comics I have to say that this film is a perfect representation of them. The freakish villians in particular are noteworthy. Theyre all here! Pruneface! Lips! Flattop! And the clever makeup gives them life in a way that is impressive even today. (Stephen Spielberg Actually cited this film as an influence for Jurassic park. The lifelike but still exagerated villians are really cool.)

Grade: I give it an A, with possible bonus for the cools semi-animated backrounds.

I was a bit skeptical of this when I went to see it. I have been a long time fan of the Anne Rice books and I couldnt help but groan when I heard who was playing the leads. In fact my doubts were overruled as soon as the film started. I am forced to grudgingly admit that both Cruise and Pitt did a good job in this and I like this movie very much. The film is stunning and beautiful and its not often that I use those words unsarcastically. My only complaint is that Interview With The Vampire left out a few key plot points (Lestat's father being first among them) Which prevent making a sequel from the much better book The Vampire Lestat which would make an awesome movie (yes, even with Cruise as lead). This flick also made Lestat into more of a villian for added dramatics. Kirsten Dunst as Claudia is really cool and she's the sort of character that you love to hate. I give the film an A+.

I think that this movie could have been done a bit better. It had a good concept and some well done scenes but it drags on a bit too much. The weird fantasy enviroment is awesome and it makes this film worth a peek if you like weirdness. The plot however can be viewed as a series of loosly conected holes held together by stunning animation. Kim Basinger as Holli Would was cool. Note to Brad Pitt: Monotone does not count as acting, nor should it be considerred any matter of pride that your performance is held up only by rejected Looney Tunes. Thank you. If you liked Roger Rabbit as a kid but are getting too old for it you might enjoy this. I give it a B-.

I was skeptical at first that this movie would be any more than a hyped up spoof but it turned out to be a great film many many memorable moments. As a diehard fan of both comedy and horror movies I have to say that this film has it all. In particular I enjoyed the scene where Buffy behaves sarcastically with the killer as she is being attacked. The plot doesnt make any sense but neither did any of the movies that it spoofs so thats fine. Consider yourself grabed by the collar and ordered to see this movie.

Personal grade: A+

I think that Monty Python is very amusing. This movie in particular is a triumph of the particular style that has kept Python famous for decades. The ending is a bit pathetic (but origional) and there are a couple sequences that are basically filler but when combined with the Black Knight Sequence, the Dead Cart scene, the whole swallows/coconuts thing and the amusing credits, this movie is great. I personally think it is a worthwhile film because the average movie budget in the UK is sixpence and the entire continent has only four fields of culture: 1)Douglas Adams (Deceased :( ) 2)Terry Pratchett 3)Monty Python 4)Ozzy Osbourne

Working in these conditions makes The Holy Grail a Masterpiece.

Duck Soup is the greatest of the Marx Brothers works. It is a clever and innovative parody of a crime so stupid theres no law against it. It's called war. Groucho's clever wit shines throughout the movie with clever lines such as:

council member: I say we take up the tax. Groucho: I say we take up the carpet. c: I insist we take up the tax! G: He's right. You have to take up the tacks before you take up the carpet.

Its one of the best movies in history!

Mark Twain said that it takes a heap of sense to write good nonsense. Parker and Stone prove him right with this satirical and witty comedy. Some would say that this film is in-appropriate. Well, they're absolutely right though I think that its part of the movies charm. It combines the strange and disturbed world of South Park with the cleverness and insight that hasn't been seen since the days of Groucho Marx. Its great!