Reviews

Everyone seems to be getting sucked into the hype...... All these 'as good as original trilogy' comments are annoying me. This film is bad. Simple as that. It's not just rose-tinted nostalgia for the old films that makes me dislike this one so much - i can see the good bits, but they are far too few and lost in a sea of CGI crap. I don't want to watch 100 computer generated guys fight another 100 computer generated guys..... when they actually got into some one-on-one lightsabre action with Dooko (or whatever his bloody name was) was much more like it...... If Lucas wants to focus on the lovey dovey bit, fine by me - BUT at least find a pair of actors who have something resembling chemistry. I found it impossible to believe that Portman and rubbish bloke had any feeling whatsoever for each other - it was like watching droids kiss, it was so mechanical. And if this is indeed a kids film, i wonder how many 8 year-olds out there are itching for heavy discussions about inter-planetary politics.... OK, there were some very pretty CGI bits, but the minute a human actor was in the midst of it the effect was ruined - it reminded me of Who Framed Roger Rabbit, only not as funny. We liked the Millenium Falcon because it was wobbly and the actors were actually in it, we don't want shiny silvery things that exist only on a hard-drive. This rant appears a bit form-less and random, so I'll shut up now. I hope you all enjoy the film, but doubt you will.

It's the kid from the Goonies!!!! Yes, the film is brilliant and I could toss on for pages about why - but 2000 other sad release-day geeks will do that so I'll focus on sean Astin. The kid from the bloody Goonies!!!! He's all fat and short and his feet have definately changed........... Oh yeah, and that cross-dressing Matrix agenty bloke makes quite a sexy elf.

But how people can sit down discussing special effects, beautiful scenery, masterful acting and the intricacies of the plot I don't know. It'll take me a few days to get over the fact that Mikey from the Goonies is a bloody hobbit.....

Oh dear, what is it about De Niro that makes me sit up til 2am watching a film on TV that I know is c**p? Anything with him in grabs my attention, all brains go out the window and I'll watch two hours of drivel even if it's blatant rubbish after only 15 mins.

Talented actors, yes. Attractive scenery, well filmed, yes. Original story and well-crafted script, NOOOOOOOOOO. Oh well I only have myself to blame......

If you like the sort of film where the ending is crystal clear to you after the opening scene, go for it. If you love De Niro but know deep down he'll never make a decent comedy, watch it anyway you sucker. But anything is better than The Mistress (or whatever that script-writer-can't-fund-his-film-unless-he-employs-the-girlfriends-of-the-m oneymen piece of poo was called)

WOW, what a fantastic, innovative BEAUTIFUL film. Everyone should be forced to watch this at an early age. Vincent Gallo may be a bit of a dodgy geezer in real life, but his writing, acting, directing, and song-writing skills are all on form here. Yes, a true auteur if ever there was one. Who needs expensive Hollywood trash when you have this little gem? Who needs continuity with dialogue and acting like this? I love every little bit of this film, even down to the glimpses of microphones and lights you get.

Just a note to add to the above comment. Fear of a Black Hat doesn't have the criminal who's image has been ripped off by the band, that's in CB4. Easily confused as the two films are so similar, but Black Hat is vastly the superior of the two..... yeah.

I haven't seen this since I was about 6 years old but I remember loving it. Yes, it was bloody long, but I used to watch it loads so it must've done something to hold my attention. I always fast-forwarded some of the more boring songs though 'Here I Stand at the Crossroads of Life' - I don't care, i want big jolly songs about mad animals. YES.

There's nothing like this about nowadays so we should treasure it whilst we still can.

I haven't seen the Eddie Murphy version and i have no plans too either, # R.I.P. Rex, you old star you......