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Reviews
New Waterford Girl (1999)
Homely and quirky
New Waterford Girl started off with great promise, and it wasn't until about 2/3 through the film that I turned to a friend and whispered "Where's the plot?" The funny thing is, it really doesn't matter. The whole device of the main character trying to build a naughty reputation in a move to convince her parents she's pregnant so she can escape her quaint Nova Scotian town is, well, absurd. The result of her ploy is even more ridiculous.
However, while watching this film, the viewer sees more of a humorous rendition of small-town NS life that is rarely seen in this light. Harkening to the heavier and headier films such as "Margaret's Museum" or the "Hanging Garden," "New Waterford Girl" looks quite fluffy on the surface. If the viewer were to look deeper beneath the easy to swallow exterior, they may find a very satisfying coming-of-age drama with probably the quirkiest cast of characters this side of the Maritimes. At times you do sympathize with the main character. At other times, like her, you realize that there's more to her backwater little village than you've been led to believe.
The fact that Liane Balaban (Mooney) looks very much like the well known American actress, Natalie Portman, doesn't hurt. Neither does the inclusion of Cathy Moriarty to the cast as the boxer moll. (In how many movies has she played that character?) All around, thoroughly enjoyable, and even poignant at times. Don't go in expecting much of a stable or believable plot, though.
The Video Dead (1987)
Did I just rent that?
Ahh..."The Video Dead." I've always wondered what the answer to the age-old question: "If I had a camera, a couple friends, and some dough...what kind of zombie flick would I make?" The answer is simple...Neon Maniacs. However, a close second would be "The Video Dead." It really is one of the most wretched movies ever made, but in reality, isn't that why we have zombie flicks? Sure it's bad...but is it WATCHABLE?
The answer is yes and no. If you've got a few good friends over and some kind of alcohol or sugar high, this flick could get very entertaining. Of course, most of the time you'll be rooting for the zombies, as the human characters are that unlikable. When the bride zombie got that chainsaw, I was waiting in child-like expectation for her to make a meat-sculpture out of Danny. Also, the last fifth of the movie was incredibly absurd, and if I were a zombie, I'd see right through that girl's "not scared" routine. There really weren't enough messy death scenes in this movie.
Anyway, if you're one of those people who has to see EVERYTHING in the horro section at the local Movieland, and the choice is between this or "Xtro2"...get "Xtro2," but come back at 11 pm for "The Video Dead!"
Freaked (1993)
What...was...that...?
Yes, the first time I watched this my mouth was agape for several hours afterwards. Then, after rehinging my jaw, I popped the tape back in and watched it another three times. "Freaked" contains more actors you think you recognize from "somewhere" than most other films of this type, (whatever you may categorize this type to be). It's got "that guy from 'Blossom'," "that girl from that show where her dad was an alien ('Out of this World')," Bill from "Bill and Ted," and...is that...Mr. T and...Brooke Shields?! I mean, how can you go wrong in this movie for people who have little attention span and a quirky need to watch completely silly films...
But wait! This film is actually spectacularly witty and can elicit more guilty guffaws than an episode of "Blind Date." The sheer absurdity of the plot and screwball dialogue ("Look he's not a real sock puppet! He's just a hand under there! Booooo!") combine to make this one of the most hilarious movies that you can watch in a dormroom.
After seeing it enough times, you may even come to quote it shamelessly. (Or shamefully, depending on your life outlook.) I have to say, the characters are some of the most creative and comical this side of Kids in the Hall; a mix between "Attack of the Killer Klowns" and a Sid and Marty Krofft nightmare. Yet surprisingly, this is one of those flicks with "heart." Or not. In any case, you have to see it to believe it! >
Suspiria (1977)
Suspiria, how I do love thee...
Suspiria, a truly incredible example of the horror genre, is most often overlooked by horror fans. This film is Dario Argento at his most creative, using more than just "jump-scare" tactics. The use of ambient lighting and shadows remind me of old German expressionist film techniques, which although limited to black and white, were still able to convey the full emotion of the scene. Here, visual effects are presented in blindingly bright colour and thick black shadow. In fact, the art direction is perhaps the most striking aspect of the film, making use of painfully imposing actual buildings in the German locale and gaudily decorated "modern-70s"-style sets. The use of extreme set-to-actor ratios, ranging from tiny, suffocating rooms to expansive indoor-and-outdoor locations, the viewer manages to feel a constant claustrophobia. The music and sound, quite piercing and discomforting, adds to the armrest-gripping mood of the film. There are a few problems, however, such as the fact that most of the actors do not speak English and are poorly dubbed. This sometimes slows down the progress of the film, as do the sometimes lengthy plot expositions provided at different points in the film. If you look at this film from a camp standpoint, some dialogue is downright hilarious, worthy of MST3K-style ripping. I do agree with lordrob in reference to the end, as the last act is almost a let down after such a strong buildup. I really have to say that Suspiria is one of my all-time favourite films. Having originally seen it on the small screen, I recently had the pleasure of seeing it again at the local English rep. cinema. Of course, the experience was quite different, and of course, this time, I was watching it in a packed theatre. (There were many more people laughing their heads off.) However, if you can, get a group of friends together and catch it if it comes to town. Or, if you can find it on video, turn off the lights and turn up the sound on the TV. Either way, you'll enjoy this Argento horror masterpiece.