Reviews

Gutterballs is the newest flick from Ryan Nicholson (Live Feed). This time around he takes on the slasher genre with a healthy dose of rape/revenge. Gutterballs sets its sites on 80's slashers, and a strong 80's music soundtrack lets you know this right from the start. This reminded of films like Hide And Go Shriek and Intruder which are both about groups of people trapped in a building unaware that their numbers are dwindling.

The film concerns two bowling teams who don't get along to well. Tempers flare and the evening ends in a pretty nasty rape scene. These days most movies play in safe when rape is part of the story with characters remaining clothed or else the assault occurs off screen. Gutterballs looks back to earlier exploitation flicks and is pretty graphic. Not quite "I Spit On Your Grave" territory, but you'd be hard pressed to find a similar depiction this explicit in any film in the last 10 years.

The next night the bowlers return to continue their match, but someone else has other plans. And that leads to some very entertaining kills, slasher movie style, and some very excellent gore, leading to not quite the ending I expected but which I found quite satisfying.

I saw the uncut version and I loved this film. This is the kind of take-no-prisoners graphic horror we seldom see these days, with sex, violence, and sexual violence all right there for the camera. But the film doesn't take itself too seriously, again reflecting its 80's slasher roots. There is some great dialog, and I especially liked the off-kilter delivery of the Joey character. There is a hilarious talking bowling ball polishing machine with attitude. There was a great little Halloween homage that had me laughing.

I'm not sure what will be cut for the R-rated version but this edition is definitely not for your mainstream horror movie tourist. There are some seriously brutal scenes, a hefty level of nudity, and a small bit of activity that would be labeled hardcore sex. I've heard others criticise the use of "expletives". It's not something I noticed, but if you're sensitive to that sort of thing probably will. In other words, the average person will probably find this movie offensive. And that's a good thing, so many movies these days go out of their way to be as inoffensive as possible, movies like this have become a rarity. On the other hand if you're a fan of 70's grindhouse sleaze and 80's slashers then this will be a bit of movie heaven.

This is one of the best movies ever. Yes, it's not for everyone, and yes there will be people that hate it, but it's pure nirvana for fans of low-budget, old-school, exploitation flicks. If you like the kind of stuff Something Weird Video puts out, if you like Troma flicks, If you liked The Halfway House then you should be grooving on this one.

The title says it all, there's a werewolf and she's in women's prison. Fans of American Werewold in London will find something to appreciate here, but I won't spoil it. Fans of nudie exploit movies will be happy as well as there is a plentiful display of female attributes.

I was pleasantly surprised to see Bernadette Perez who was in a few of the older flicks from The Asylum in which she supplied some of the nudity. Sadly she remained clothed in this (WTF is up with that anyway?).

I have only one real negative criticism of the film, and that is that it didn't have a shower scene. Every fan of women in prison (WIP) flicks knows that a shower scene is one of the most important scenes in the genre and so I felt a bit let down. I will mostly overlook the transgression because of a lot of assorted nudity throughout but it's the only thing holding it back from a 10 for me.

The gore is mostly pretty good and plentiful, though low-budget and cheesy. There was a little wince-worthy cgi at the end which would have been much better as practical f/x, but for the most part I liked the gore.

So for folks who like this kind of stuff (and you know who you are), then you will want to see this post haste as it is one of the finest example of the genre in years.

First off. See the cover of the US release DVD? Forget it, forget everything about it. It's kind of this slick nazisploitation s&m thing. That is not this movie, and if you go in expecting that you will be very disappointed. Not that Sadomaster is a bad movie, but the cover art is an example of really bad marketing.

Okay, so what is Sadomaster? It's a micro-budget splatter flick, think something along the lines of an Andreas Schnaas flick, that tries hard to be offensive. Story-wise it's a revenge flick with a political corruption back story, say along the lines of The Crow. Only our protagonist is a wino. And the revenge is for some dead retarded guy whose brains he ate. There's definitely some offensive stuff here, like when the hoods/punks/Nazis/whatever kill the retarded guy they do some pretty graphic (but low budget) sodomy. There's a decent amount of gore, some good, some not so good, but it was all pretty fun. I can get into the whole micro-budget splatter thing so I mostly liked it. It did drag a little bit at times (not the non-stop splatter-fest of something like Plaga Zombie or Le Bagman), but there was enough whacked out and offensive stuff that it was overall an entertaining flick. If you're in to micro-budget splatter it's worth a look.

This is a tough one to describe, maybe noirsploitation? Maybe if Billy Wilder were to remake Preminger's Laura as an exploitation movie after dropping six tabs of acid and watching Eat The Schoolgirl, Arsenic & Old Lace, and a Joe D'Amato flick... and doing it in a mix of English, Greek, and French. Singapore Sling is a dark and twisted neo-noir black comedy about a mother and daughter with a special kind of relationship and the introduction of a new man into their lives. So we get some disembowelment, murder, sex, incest, bondage, puking, urinating, electro shock, a good helping of nudity, and lots of other fun stuff. It's been a while since I've seen a good bizarre flick like this, it's right up there with Visitor Q and Penetration Angst. Good stuff!

I just saw Evil Aiens and I have to say, this baby lives up to all the hype. This is a new UK movie about a news crew for one of those unexplained mysteries type shows who go to a Welsh island to investigate a reported alien abduction. Along the way we get anal probes, implants, crop circles, cattle mutilations, alien fetuses, inbred Welsh, and interspecies lovin'.

I guess the easiest way to describe this would be to say something like it's predator meets Dead Alive or Undead meets Bad Taste or Plaga zombie: Zona mutante meets Alien, but this movie homages or gives a nod to countless (as in I lost count) horror and alien movies, and even some other famous flicks, including Predator, Alien, Close Encounters, The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly, Cannibal Holocaust, Jaws, Evil Dead, Star Wars, Signs, Night of the Living Dead, The X-Files, Bad Taste, and Dead ALive. There is lots of blood gore in this baby, lots of ripped off and cut off and shot off limbs and heads, lot of blood. You think the lawnmower in Dead Alive was good? This film really puts power tools to use, like a chainsaw, a roter tiller, and a combine harvester. Did I say that this had lots of blood and guts? We also get some sex, though unfortunately no human nudity except a little man-butt. We do get some alien hooter though.

I definitely got an Undead vibe from this but this was so much more outrageous and over the top. I haven't had fun like this in a while. I'll give this an 9/10 for uber-gory goodness and mucho low budget alien killing. Would have gave it more but it looses a point for teasing me with 2 1/4 love scenes without the girls getting naked.

"Before there was LOST... before there was JURASSIC PARK... before the was KING KONG... there was Arthur Conan Doyle's THE LOST WORLD" - That's from one of the trailers for this, so you can see what audience there trying to attract this time. You know the way there would be companies that would specialize in doing rip-off type films *cough New World Pictures cough* ? Well this has been the ground that The Asylum has staked out in recent years. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing as they have turned out quite a few commendable b horror movies of late, but I just wanted to point out for those not acquainted with them what they're about.

Yup, this is the latest b movie from The Asylum. This is probably their most ambitious film to date and for it they gather most of their regular actors, "The Asylum Players", including:

Rhett Giles (Mangler Reborn, Frankenstein Reborn, War of the Worlds, Jolly Roger, Legion of the Dead) Jeff Denton (Beast of Bray Road, Frankenstein Reborn) Thomas Downey (Shapeshifter, Beast of Bray Road, War of the Worlds, Dead Men Walking, Frankenstein Reborn, Jolly Roger, Shapeshifter) Christina Rosenberg (Beast of Bray Road, Frankenstein Reborn) Sarah Lieving (Beast of Bray Road, Frankenstein Reborn, War of the Worlds) Eliza Swenson (Beast of Bray Road, Frankenstein Reborn) Amanda Ward (Legion of the Dead, Way of the Vampire, Alien Abduction) and Leigh Slawner (Shapeshifter, Dead Men Walking, Frankenstein Reborn, War of the Worlds, Jolly Roger) who is also the director and has previously directed Beast of Bray Road and Frankenstein Reborn

Unfortunately there's no sign of Bernadette Perez, one of their regular actors who can usually be counted on to supply some nudity.

They've also added a couple of "name" actors, Bruce Boxleitner and Steve Railsback.

Okay, first off, this is not a monster movie. Yeah, there's a monster or two, but this is really more of an adventure film like Lost World. They also try to capitalize on the popularity of LOST (which I've never seen by the way) and of course the upcoming King Kong by throwing in a giant ape. And just for fun they add a touch of Lord of the Flies.

The story starts with a airliner crash on a beach somewhere that I guess is supposed to be in South America. A group of the survivors move inland looking for the front half of the plane, the radio, and any other survivors. Along they way they run in to some unusual jungle wildlife. The story is really straight forward and just an excuse for the jungle adventure. It moved along at a nice pace, so while the story was nothing special it wasn't boring.

The acting, as usual for The Asylum, is quite good. Rhett Giles, who I usually don't like, does a really good job here. I do think that he studied acting from watching early Clint Eastwood films as I have yet to see him smile in a role. On the other hand, Thomas Downey, who I usually like as a good guy doesn't play a jerk all that well. Jeff Denton does another good job as the main character. Christina Rosenberg is especially hot in her biggest The Asylum role so far. Special kudos to Amanda Ward who supplies the only (brief) nudity in the film.

Bruce Boxleitner does an acceptable but uninspired turn as the military guy with a hidden agenda. Steve Railsback puts in a day's work and collects a paycheck.

So the story is nothing special, the acting is pretty good, but a movie like this lives or dies by the F/X. Unfortunately that's where the movie fails. It's pretty obvious that this was rushed through in order to get it on the shelves in time to coincide with the release of King Kong (with a cover prominently featuring a giant gorilla).

As far as monsters it's CGI all the way. And not good CGI. We get a big spider, some big scorpions, some flying dragons (???), and of course the giant gorilla. The cgi critters are all pretty unconvincing and detract from the film. Also, there's just not much monster action, and most of what little there is takes place in the third act. The cgi gorilla, which we don't see much of at all, doesn't so much look like a cgi gorilla as it does a cgi man in a gorilla costume.

While the actors were commendable, they weren't enough to carry a film with a mediocre script and sparse yet unsatisfactory effects. For the scope of what they were attempting with this one the fact that it was really rushed is painfully obvious. Also, The Asylum, which usually comes through with some gratuitous nudity, let me down this time with just a couple of seconds of toplessness. There was a tiny bit of gore, but again, not enough to satisfy. I'll be generous and give it a 6/10 because the acting was good and I wasn't bored, but I wouldn't really recommend this.

Surprisingly good film, though I question whether it's a horror film. It opens with a very slasher-esquire scene, and maintains much of that ambiance throughout the film. After that it moves into crime drama territory and the focus for the remainder of the film is on various law enforcement folks. But it also borrows much from the giallo, including changing the character focus, a few red herrings, a killer with black gloves, a lot of twists and turns, and a slightly contrived conclusion that somehow brings resolution. Unfortunately it leaves out the bloody kills. There were a couple of parts that dragged a little but overall the pacing was adequate. This is low budget fare, but if that doesn't bother you and you're looking for a dark crime thriller with a little giallo flavor thrown it then this is worth a look. 7/10. A tiny bit of gore, and a couple of short nude scenes.

Okay, I just watched Beast of Bray Road. It was the new werewolf flick from Asylum.

The film didn't really cover any new ground, it was a pretty much by the numbers werewolf flick. The story was similar to the Jaws story line. The acting for the most part was pretty decent. The beast looked like a cross between a werewolf and bigfoot. No cgi, which I liked, this was a good old school guy in a costume. We don't get any full transformation scenes, but considering the budget I would say that was for the best.

Nothing new here, but it didn't bore me either, moving along at a decent pace. We had a good amount of gore and a little bit of boobs. Don't go out of your way looking for this unless you need to see every werewolf movie, but there are worse ways to spend 90 minutes.

I can usually find something good in most low budget horror movies. This is one that I can't. It is so bad on so many levels. This is about a bunch of young folks who go to an island to do a reality survivor type show and are menaced by some resurrected pirate. It starts off with what is supposed to be the origin of the pirate, which looked like it was filmed at historical museum sites (you know, everything is clean and filmed at weird angles so you don't see the tourist signs) with really bad costuming. Note to producers, if you don't have the money to build set, don't do stuff like this, it looks really cheesy. All of the very few characters are completely unlikeable 2-dimensional stereotypes. After seeing Curse of El Charro recently and this flick I've noticed a new stereotype appearing, that is the really obnoxious home girl black chick. The acting is uniformly weak. And did I mention I hated hip-hop/rap soundtracks? It especially doesn't work for a evil pirate movie that takes place on a tropical island. So do we at least get some gore? No way, some blood, but no gore. Do we at least get some boobs? Nope, no luck, not even some nudity to save this.

I have to say, this is one of the worst low-budget horror flicks I've seen in a while. If you want to see a half way decent evil pirate low budget horror flick then check out Jolly Roger: Massacre at Cutter's Cove (2005) which came out a few months ago, but I suggest you pass on this one.

I just watched Giallo A Venezia First off, it's not a giallo, it's a crime story. It opens with 2 bodies and a bunch of cops and goes from there with the investigation, and it's quite a while before anyone is actually killed. And when it does happen it's not a mystery, as we see the killers face. The story has some twists and turns to it though.

A good part of the film is flash-backs of the the 2 victims doing kinky sex things. Yeah, there's a decent amount of sex in this, probably on par with a typical Jess Franco film, some of it was okay, some a little boring. There's also some pretty gruesome gore stuff late in the film. Otherwise the plot is fairly simple, on par with say a typical 70's cop show.

To recap, I wouldn't say this was all that good... a lot of sex (some simulated, some female masturbation, some kinky stuff), a couple of decent gore killings, and not a giallo.

If you want a giallo with a lot of sex the best I've seen so far would be Slaughter Hotel, or maybe Washing Machine (though that one is kind of a borderline giallo).

I really enjoyed this movie. It's a no-budget movie about the making of a no-budget movie. It's like a demented This Is Spinal Tap for the indie horror crowd.

The film centers around three main characters producing the film within a film I'm not sure how much of the dialog was improve but it comes across as very natural. What the film lacks in budget it makes up for with a hilarious script, strong acting, and loads of gratuitous nudity from a very attractive group of supporting actors.

I came across this because it was listed as horror, but it's primarily a dark comedy with a strong exploitation back beat. If you have a twisted sense of humor then you'll probably appreciate this.

I love slasher, I'm very forgiving of slashers, but I can't remember when I've seen one with some many lapses of logic before.

This is definitely a post-Scream slasher. Little blood, no gore, no boobs. The directing and cinematography was fine. Some of the acting was okay, some was pretty bad. The script was really bad. The dialog was inane but more importantly so much just didn't work logically.

But it did have a really outrageously stupid ending. If there is any value here at all it is for cheesiness. If you're looking for a good slasher then I would suggest looking elsewhere. If you're looking for a mildly cheesy slasher this might work.

They took the facade of the original movie and slapped it on a pretty typical teen hack and slash. The first one at least tried to be a little original, this one is pure formula. They bulked up Morty and changed his back story, so this film really has nothing to do with the first one.

This time around the cast is all young 20-something stereotypes (as opposed to the more mixed generations in the first film. This one also appears to be shot with even less of a budget than the first one. They've added a little more gore to this but dispensed with any nudity.

While the first one was't that good it did keep me interested. This was just too derivative, hardly distinguishable from a thousand other hack and slash films.

Okay, first off, stay away from the R1 DVD. It's cut/censored to the point where some scenes don't even make sense.

This movie started with an interesting premise and did a pretty good job with it. It's not a typical monster/slasher and has a little bit of a psychological lean to it. It's got a mix of you and old actors so the acting tends to be pretty good especially from Ann Turkel and Vince Edwards. Even the ending was a little different from your typical hack and slash. And if you watch the VHS or R2 version you get a smattering of gore and nudity.

On the other hand it was a little like the Melrose Place of horror movies, everyone was hitting on everyone and I don't think one character had any fidelity to their current relationships.

It didn't succeed 100% but if you want to see something a little different horror-wise you could do worse. If you're looking for action (it drags in spots) and gore, then skip this. If you like to check out different kinds of horror movies, can get in to somewhat psychological films, and don't require stuff that's all formula this might do for a rental. Just don't set your hopes too high.

A little old school 80's slasher, a little post-Scream modern slasher, mix, add water and you get something like this killer-in-a-mask slasher. Very formula in a slightly different setting, lots of pretty teens, this time at a large indoor pool (hence the title) are being stalked. And this time an English language German movie filmed in the Czech Republic with an international cast of young pretty actors.

It was played straight, and built some nice tension which was nice like the slasher pics of old A good amount of blood, but light on the gore and only one very brief flash of nudity are the bad traits it has inherited from the post-Scream generation of slashers.

A sequel is coming up. I assume that will also be set at a pool (since it being called Pool 2), or perhaps the same pool. Add a little gore and T&A next time around folks.

If you enjoy competently made slasher films that don't stray too much from the formula then you should find this a pleasant 90 minute diversion.

This was one great cheesy monster flick. Sort of like an updated, lower budgeted, tongue-in-cheek version of Humanoids From The Deep. You have a horny giant mutant frog, you have naked lesbians, you have action, a love story, everything.

Okay, it was real low budget, but the acting wasn't too bad. They probably could have done with a little more money for the frog costume, maybe a few more mutant frogs, but for what they had they did a really good job.

And the directing and editing were pretty good. Often with low budget flicks I get distracted by too many static camera long shots and bad pacing, but this film didn't suffer from either of those.

If you liked Humandoids, if you groove on Troma, then you'll love this little fun movie.

First off, I love slasher-type films. No matter how cheesy as long as they stick to the formula I'm happy. That includes some gore and some T&A.

This is a no-budget films that tries. Sure it could have been a lot better if they actually had some money, but they did good with what they had.

The story was typical, the dialog not too bad, and the acting was pretty good. I could have done without the fisheye lens and solarization effect which tend to highlight the lack of production money, but the film survived them.

The gore was pretty cheesy most of the time, but they made a valiant effort, and not-that-great gore is better than no gore. The film also had a nice helping of T&A for sleaze-hounds like me. Kudos especially to Tara Platt and Lisa Robert for being troopers and doing what it takes.

If you like low budget 80's slasher then you will probably dig this.

This movie is such cheesy goodness.

A bunch of people trapped in an abandoned school. They start getting killed off, they know they are being stalked, so what do they do? One girl decides to take a bath, another decides to cheat on her husband (who is also there) with an old boyfriend so they somehow find a bed (in an old abandoned school?) and go at it.

And it comes through with the gore and the T&A.

And it's also interesting from a historical/sociological point of view. Where the usual 80's slasher is a reflection of how we view ourselves, or how adults view young people, or as Hollywood views the rest of the country this has a unique perspective. This is a Brit film made to be an American slasher. It's hilarious to see how often the British actors who are trying to speak "American" unintentionally slip back in to their UK accents.

If you like cheesy 80's slashers (like Pieces) then you will like this one.

This film, and its sequel (filmed concurrently) is by far the best movie version of the Dumas novel ever produced. The cast is excellent. The sets and costumes are marvelous. The swordplay (and there is much) is possible some of the most realistic ever filmed. And it's the only Musketeer movie I am aware of in which the Musketeers actually use muskets. Authenticity seems to have been very important to the producers, as well as staying true to the novel.

Sadly a film like this wouldn't be made these days. First off the fighting would be "punched-up" with a lot of wire work. And of course Hollywood would change the story to eliminate much of the "sleeping around" characters do (today's movie heroes in this type of movie aren't usually sexually active). They would also provide some creative story editing so that a certain character who dies in the novel would survive so as to supply the requisite happy ending. Fortunately for us this version does not suffer that kind of revisionism.

If you're a fan of Dumas or just looking for a fun film with lots of realistic sword fighting then you won't want to miss this.