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Reviews
A Madea Homecoming (2022)
Bad Rip off of Big Momma's House
Terrible. Possibly the worst film I have seem ain a long while.
Basically a really bad reharsh of Big Momma's house but devoid of any type of comedy.
Every second seems like the actors are trying to impersonate Martin Lawrence/ Eddie Murphy style with no success whatsoever.
The intro starts with a man setting himself on fire with a barbecue in some sort of 19060's Marx brothers parody, and the outdates "'jokes' just keep going from there.
The only upside to the film is where Brendan O#Carroll comes in to the film bringing a sense of humour and comedy to poor writing. But alas turd polishing is all that can be done by this stage.
Use your time better, watch the inside of your eyelids. It'd be more fun.
Conan the Barbarian (1982)
Lacking but passable
A tale of the underdog striving for vengeance and equality. With early man animalistic charichteristics being ironically pesonified by Schwartnegger's improficcient acting.
A major faux pais however is the mention of Steel in conjuction with the Hyborian age setting of C9000-3500BC preceeding the iron age.
A fair storyline with minimal acting, script and effects leaves an irresprective longing for better.
The Land Before Time VII: The Stone of Cold Fire (2000)
Good
Like the original, a well crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from fanily, trust, democracy, greed, honour, teamwork, friendship and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
Unlike the original this has several musical numbers which seem dubious in the context of the series. The songs seem to get marginally better throughout the series.
A must watch for kids.
The Land Before Time VI: The Secret of Saurus Rock (1998)
Pretty good
Like the original, a well crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from idols, kindness, altruism, prejudice, responsibility, teamwork, friendship and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
Unlike the original this has several musical numbers which seem dubious in the context of the series. The songs seem to get marginally better throughout the series.
A must watch for kids.
The Land Before Time V: The Mysterious Island (1997)
Great
Like the original, an well crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from greed, altruism, cherishing parents, prejudice, teamwork, friendship and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
Unlike the original this has several musical numbers which seem dubious in the context of the series. The songs seem to get marginally better throughout the series. Those featres in this sequel are possibly the best and most emotive of the whole series.
A must watch for kids.
The Land Before Time IV: Journey Through the Mists (1996)
pretty good
Like the original, an well crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from envy, jealousy, prejudice, teamwork, friendship and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
Unlike the original this has several musical numbers which seem dubious in the context of the series. The songs seem to get marginally better throughout the series.
However a must watch for kids
The Land Before Time III: The Time of the Great Giving (1995)
Pretty good
Like the original, an amazingly crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from bullyng, arrogance, pride, prejudice, discrimination, teamwork, friendship, sharing and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
Unlike the original this has several musical numbers which seem dubious in the context of the series. The songs are marginally better than the second film, but still quite ropey.
However a must watch for kids.
The Land Before Time II: The Great Valley Adventure (1994)
Pretty good
Like the original, an well crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from peer pressure, friendship, listening to your parents, cherishing childhood, prejudice, discrimination, teamwork and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
Unlike the original this has several musical numbers which seem dubious in the context of the series. Some of the songs are bad and others are just awful.
However a must watch for kids.
The Land Before Time (1988)
A must watch for kids
An amazingly crafted heatwarming tale. This storyline is full of morals and lessons from listening to your parents, teamwork, to the perils of pride and much more.
The animation is traditional and simplistic with some innccuracies of depictions of species' features and some inaccuacies between Mesozoic and Cenozoic periods. However the dubbing is amazing with characters vocal patterns and use of language being correlative to the species presumed intelligence.
A must watch for kids.
Walking with Dinosaurs 3D (2013)
Educational comedy
Once seperated from the original documentary series and taken as the very well animated educational kids film that it is. It hits on all points, an eductational, comical piece with with great emotive unretones and great CGI.
The child narration gives for a very digestable educational characteristic with genus and spelling divulged throughout the piece.
The story and dubbing are well done with relatable themes and morals shining through. A quandry would be why the dinosaurs mouths don't move to speak; which is logically explained with the fact that dinosaurs lacked lips so any additional muscular structure would negate the educational premise.
A great choice for kids.
Ice Age: Collision Course (2016)
Overdone
As with the original, an exciting and emotive film with a great comical feel and a variety of morals. However apart from being this sequel being well dubbed it is by far the most nonsensical and remisc. As with the forth, the story and comedy seem to lack any of the originality of the first and third films.
An ok sequel but lacking.
Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012)
Rehash
As with the original, an exciting and emotive film with a great comical feel and a variety of morals. This coulourful piece is well dubbed and enticing but the story and comedy seem to lack any of the originality of the first and third films.
An ok sequel but lacking.
Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs (2009)
Great
As with the original, an exciting and emotive film with a great comical feel and a variety of morals. This coulourful piece is well dubbed and enticing. A great sequel and possibly the funniest of the whole series.
Ice Age: The Meltdown (2006)
Great
As with the original, an exciting and emotive film with a great comical feel and a variety of morals. This coulourful piece is well dubbed and enticing. A great sequel although quite repetative of the original.
Ice Age (2002)
Great
An exciting and emotive film with a great comical feel and a variety of morals. This coulourful piece is well dubbed and enticing. A great family film alround.
The Clan of the Cave Bear (1986)
Interesting
An interesting and dramatic take on the origins of the homsapien genus. The storyline is progressive and emersive with strong performances, good visuals and a enjoyable sondtrack. Overall a pretty good film.
Planet of Dinosaurs (1977)
Meh
A very simplistic drawn out storyline with not much imagination. Reasonable effects and acting for the period but leaves alot to be desired.
One Million Years B.C. (1966)
Imressive for it's time
A well written and portrayed piece with great progression.
The minimal use of script hightens the authenticitiy whilst allowing the quite impressive 60's effects to shine through with acting that does not dissapoint.
Overall impressive for it's time however some animals may have been harmed in it's making.
The Turning (2020)
Passable
A re-hashed haunted house style film with less detail. The storyline is predictable from the beginning with few twists. The script writing is lazy at best. The actors do a fair job with what they are given.
The big stars of this show however are the scenery, house and costume.
Jus passable.
100 Million BC (2008)
Bad.
A very bad film all round.
From the predictable storyline to the terrible script writing, this film has no redeamable features whatsoever. Bad casting, acting, lighting and visual effects, etc.
Misable.
The King (2019)
Valiant
A strong historic storyline taken partly from Shakespeare's plays and told with dramatic licence and some inacuracies.
Nevertheless a very well cast and scripted film with great acting performances all round.
The only downsides are continuity and content with some disjointed scenes needing more links and an overwhelming desire for more detail.
On the whole a great release from Netflix.
Year One (2009)
Comically mediocre
A somewhat comical interpretation of the first bible stories arranged fairly well. With a quite typical performance from Jack Black. Not a must see but not a waste of time.