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Reviews
Spy Kids 3: Game Over (2003)
I've been betrayed
I was a huge fan of the Spy Kids franchise - it was fun, family appropriate, and creative. SK and SK2 were a pair of rare movies where kids and parents could sit together and both be glad they came.
Spy Kids 3D is a horrible, wretched waste of celluloid that is a betrayal to the fans and nothing more than a cheap ploy to exploit a successful, quality series for a pile of cash. Despite the fact that the movie is in "3D" (gee, I seem to remember seeing pictures of people wearing 3D glasses in the '50's), the production values are terrible and the plot is basically non-existent. The cheap 3D glasses will give you a headache and blur the film more than they provide a unique viewing experience.
The basic plot is this: Juni Cortez, played by Daryl Sabara (apparently the only original cast member willing to invest more than 15 minutes in the creation of this dreck) jumps into a video game to save his sister. He takes Grandpa with him.
That's about it. There are so many plot holes and logical dead ends that in the end, just face the fact that since this is a formula movie, the good guys will win after an hour or so of headache-inducing semi-animated action.
In the end, we see about a minute each of the remaining cast members from the previous movies. Their presence is barely explained, and their contribution to the climax is questionable (after each gets his/her cameo, they're pretty much out of the rest of the movie).
Finally, I do have to say that my seven-year-old was enthralled and probably would have given the movie a 10. See, he's more into the fact that he got to wear a cool pair of glasses during the flick than the fact that the actual story itself stank like a year-old gym shoe.
Rain (2001)
Multiple flaws ruin good story
I expected a low-budget movie that was long on story and short on effects. The story, however, was full of hackneyed elements (the jaded Lt. who won't trust the new guy, the platoon full of chip-on-the-shoulder vets, the new guy who earns the platoon's respect through his grit...and on and on). It was also piled high with errors in detail that just irritated me. It seems as though there were no military advisors at all working on this film. Few or none of the rifles carried by the platoon dated to Vietnam. In one case, a sharpshooter picks off a VC sniper using a rifle developed in the mid-90's that shoots pistol ammo - hardly the high-accuracy piece they were trying to depict.
The romance that appears in the film is also laughable and totally unnecessary. That the lead character places his love in harm's way with little regard for her safety is obnoxious - and probably worth a court martial.
I am an animal lover, and when I heard Animal Planet was going to show the story of military dogs in Vietnam, I was excited. The story, though, is thin and the attention to detail was so poor as to be a distraction.