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Jeepers Creepers: Reborn (2022)
America has decided it will destroy every good movie
OK, I had so much text, but then I realized there is no point. So I deleted it I am going to make it short(er)
I love horror movies (or good movies in general)and most of the time I am very forgiving. For example I love first trilogy of Star Wars, I like second trilogy and despite of everything I liked even the last trilogy. But I had to set my mind "I am watching sci-fi, not the star wars anymore" so I wasn't paying attention to the story or characters, but I watched only CGi and action scenes... same with my top movie Alien, watching Prometheus was very disappointing but when I watched it second time and I knew it is not about Aliens I like it... as a Sci-fi movie. Same with Resident Evils, Predators (exception last one, that one is really good) etc etc... so I can enjoy a movie even if it does not follow "original " in everything.
But what I can't stand it stupidity in movies. (outside movies as well).
Terrible and illogical characters and their stupid decisions (pull over a car, get out and go to pee so far, that you need GPS to find that car again) or going alone during the night somewhere, of my "favorite", fist fight with monsters... that is always "WOW" ... etc, of course I hate childish adaptations (like for example for me LoTR in amazing, Hobbit is terrible and Harry potter is disgrace, Punisher is amazing, Batman vs Superman is amazing, Dark Knight is amazing, Logan is amazing etc... but Antman, or new Thor or Wonder woman etc... it is for 9 years old"
You will find every single of these stupid aspects here unfortunately.
Combine these things with almost all the time terrible CGi (to be fair, some scenes looked decent) and "broken" bad guy, in this case Creeper (who doesn't simply follow what he was last 300 years or so) and "incredible" fighting scenes with ... OMG, I have to stop...
Simply... this was bad, terrible and whoever directed, 23 people each day should have peepee poopoo on his hands and society must forbid him to go to the water for the rest of his life!
Creeper is not creepy anymore, because he looks more human than people here, he is not capable of killing anymore because he has become musician and ... damn, I have to stop.
But good news... it can't be worse, just can't. If there is gonna be another one, it must be better... and another good news, suddenly part 3 looks much better now that yesterday :D.
The Reef: Stalked (2022)
there is nothing to see here... back to "Shallow"
I am a huge fan of "shark" movies and honestly in the last 5 years or so there was surprisingly many good movies with this theme. My top is definitely "Shallow" and very good one was "47 Meters Down".
This one has many flaws in very basic aspects in this genre.
What do you need? You need good CGi, you need good acting and most importantly you need great directing so it would feel realistic.
1. CGi is 50/50 , you have real sharks (or at least it looks like it) but the problem is it looks like a documentary movie, which is not a good sign. And then you have bad very unrealistic scenes with shark. So most of the time it doesn't fit the movie
2. Memorable scenes, you will not find a single one. And that is bad. You will see 10x the same scene with a fin on the surface, you will see lots of bubbles and splashes and you will see few times something under the surface (should be shark) that looks like someone draw it with a marker.
3. Victims and story. Sometimes filmmakers have tendency to forget what genre they are filming. This seems that case. This really feels like a drama with her personal trauma set in the water where by a chance is THE shark. It should be other way around. Another thing is, don't try to force some pathetic story to "catastrophic" movie. There is no need. This should be about surviving, not about trying to overcome your fears of diving. On top of that when you lost someone, it is more than obvious they will not make a movie you will loose someone else. So after 10 min you know who will survive and who will not.
It's not hard to have a right vision for this kind of movies, but why filmmakers are trying to do something "more" is beyond me?!
Overall this is slightly below average movie. There is really no need to watch this because you will be disappointed and after 40mins you will check how many more minutes it will take to end this "journey"
Swamp Thing (2019)
Perfect with the worst
Oh, where to start? I clicked 7/10 and 2/10 . Why? Two different rating for two different parts. 7 is for whole series, except one terrible thing. Will talk about it little bit later.
Its great scenery, interesting story, with some good character, some not so much, very good horror vibes, nothing for 12 years old like ant man etc. It get even pretty brutal sometimes. It's more thriller mystery than classic comic, which is great I think. We have dark past here, we have really bad guys everywhere. Everyone is hiding something disgusting... of course there is "supernatural", even though I don't think anything like supernatural is possible, once it is witnessed. It's just something we do not understand at all.
There is/was a potential for sure here
So why 2/10 you ask? Some scene makes no sense, stupid decisions from characters, like "marine" emptying his magazine and then looking at the rifle like "why it is not shooting anymore"? this kind of IQ 25 thinking is something regular in the movies these day, nothing out of ordinary...
But what stands out in this series, from very first scene until the last one is the main character! It is absolute pain everytime she will do something or say something. CDC doctor? With no, and I mean no sense for security, health protocols, treatments etc etc... if this woman is "the ace" of CDC, oh god, please help us, because we are doomed.
Every single decision she will make is completely wrong. And many times it was bringing me to a feeling where I wanted to hit my head at least 3 times very hard in to the table, wall, door .. whatever close to me that time, so I will forget what I just saw.
So where it will leave us? Be aware and be prepared for this. Give it a try, it's a good series overall, it has almost perfect horror scenes with good special effects, some very intriguing characters and conversations, mixed with mystical and darkness around it. But when "SHE" will come, expect very opposite of that. Take a drink, go to toilet, rewind etc... simply try to ignore her, watch only the rest.
47 Meters Down: Uncaged (2019)
Just please... Don't think
I love movies with sharks, alligators, lions etc. Aliens vs predator etc, doesn't really matter to me what kills those "main" characters.
This movie is not bad, Ok it is, but the production is good, cast is... well not so much, but hopefully they will die anyway, so who cares.
OK, seriously now. It's a movie where you must keep your brain out of your head before you click "play". There is so many unreal scenes that you want to bang your head into the wall. Especially last 20 mins of the movie.
If anyone has seen The Crawl than this is the spin-off. Not a bad movie, but incredibly stupid things, like swimming faster than crocodile in the water... etc. You will find similar scenes here.
But Uncaged is still watchable, if you are a fan. I gave 7 because there were shark (it gave 3 extra points to the movie)
The Gracefield Incident (2017)
interesting idea killed with... everything
Pfuuu... where to start.
OK, we go with bad things and the good things
Bad: Unlogical thinking like, screaming as loud as you can when you trying to hide or to be unseen. After you saw a creature as tall as a tree you still go to sleep with opened windows, having whole area including interior, exterior of the cabin under surveillance but not keeping an eye on monitors, not waking up anybody even there is a monster inside the cabin, having night-vision on camera but wont use it inside the cave etc etc etc. Things like these are bad in movies, but in this case these weren't the worst... acting. 80per of the movie you will not believe any of the actors (the only bright exception was the girlfriend of the main guy... don't know what was her name and honestly I can not care less. But few times she acted really like an actress... actual actress), but acting was still not the worst part of the movie... that one belongs to the voices. Terrible editing and mixing. It does not matter how far away from each other everyone was, doesn't matter what other sounds were in the same time there, You can still hear everyone the same volume.
Good: Nothing ... OK, its about aliens... that's it
Summary: Terrible. In bad things I wasn't talking about the story, because by itself it might have been good, but everything else killed it. Including terrible ending.
I am really big fan of horror, sci-fi, mystery etc movies... but this one I wouldn't recommend. Its not the worst movie I have seen in my life, but its probably not worthy of anybodies time
The Monster (2016)
Good horror with some incredibly stupid moments
OK, without any delays. This movie is definitely worth to watch and not only for horror fans.
No spoilers said, this movie could have been very easily in different genre. Delete few scenes and add few more flashbacks and you would get probably the Oscar nominated drama.
Movie is separated into two different stories, one from the past and the other happening now. The one from the present is the horror one and the one from the past is something (in my eyes) even more disturbing. Story of one (un)happy family and the life of little girl.
Despite not the big budget (I think) most of the movie you will not notice that, very good camera, good acting (except few moments), good scenes and environment, lots of tension which is growing every moment and etc etc...
In many cases production "stole" good ideas from classic horrors, things like dark, faint sounds, rain in forest, not seeing anything but knowing something is there and the best thing ... not showing the monster!
And here we are getting into the one of the two problems of the movie. First problem will appear when they will finally show the monster. Suddenly you would appreciate bigger budget. Its not the worst, I have seen much worse, but still I can imagine something ... And the second thing is the incredible stupid decisions someone (dont want to say who and what) will make.
But this is the problem of almost all horror movies, stupid decisions. For example, new Blair Witch (2016), late at night, in the woods, you looking for a witch and you need to pee ... what will you do? You will go alone to take a leak. Or another thing, bonfire is "dying" and you need a wood to keep it alive ... what will you do? You will go alone, without telling anyone and you will go so far away, when the trees will be falling down and you will be shouting for your life, no one can hear you!
But as I said the movie is "very" good, but few things (all of them almost at the end of the movie) will drag it down to average, without these it might have been much, much better
Imaginaerum (2012)
Musical movie without song?
I have to say, that I was looking forward for this movie for a very long time because I am fan of Nightwish for many years now. I love their music, personally I think that after Tarja's departure, nightwish has better music... vocals its hard to say.
Album Imaginaerum was (is) great, I think its pure nightwish, great power, symphonic, melodic, slow & fast staff all over entire album. So I was expecting great musical movie.
Honestly I don't know for whom this movie is made for, cause nightwish fans want to hear nightwish & rest of the people who don't listen to metal probably don't care (or don't even know that there is something like imaginaerum)
Story is confusing, until very end you will not know what is going on exactly, but I wasn't expecting another boring Oscar stuff, I expected average story with excellent music and songs. For my surprise there are only three songs (really!) and one of them is just a brief passage, another one is interrupted with talking and the last one is almost whole. Thats it? Musical movie, with three not complete songs? Why? Why did they decided to make movie with same songs as they already have on their album & then they simply never used them. I really don't understand that. Most of the time when music starts to play (ussualy in background) after some time it stars to look like finally they will sing, tempo is graduating, everything goes louder & louder & louder and then... skip. Nothing another scene... talking... again.
Don't take me wrong, its not a bad movie, even effects are quite good, but for me this movie is probably under average, to tell you the truth if I didn't know that its from nightwish I would have never watched it, and I wouldn't have missed much.
Shame & pity... disappointment
The Shrine (2010)
Really good horror movie
No famous actors, no famous director, no famous places and yet this movie is better than many others.
I was kinda skeptical before watching, but I liked trailer so I gave it a try, and I am glad I did because I can say this movie is a big surprise... in a good way.
First of all, movie is not unnecessarily long, not even 90 min which is good comparing it to many other two hours long movies where you are bored after first 30 mins.
Story is fresh, and I think I can say original, it will take us to Poland (language fits here and makes good atmosphere, the only problem is for "english only" people, because they will need subs). There are some things you would not expect and it does not take long till the "horror" starts. And when it does, there is one good scene after another. Masks are pretty good, acting as well (especially Marcus and Henryk), not too much blood and gore but instead thrill and scary scenes.
The end of the movie (in particular the last scene) is brilliant, I was really scared. Amazing voices combined with perfect masks makes that one, one of the best scenes I have seen this year. And I have seen a lot.
Overall this movie was more than good for me, If you like horror movies like Stake Land, Mutant (french), Underground, or old great and famous Exorcism etc ... I think you will like this one too.
If your answer is YES, do not wait anymore, turn off the lights, put your headphones on and enjoy!
I did.
The Tunnel (2011)
Paranormal Activity, Blair Witch & Rec ...
First thing first... Turn OFF the lights, put your headphones on and send everyone from the room away and ONLY then ... click PLAY!
I can tell your right now, that if you are fan of all mentioned movies, you will most probably like this one too. There is everything you would expect from "real" horror movie.
I was tensed when I was watching & I can say it is interesting and probably the most realistic of all similar movies. Not because of the quality of the movie, but because of this can REALLY be true. Don't take me wrong, I am not saying that I actually believe in this, but it is more likely to happen than all of the "predecessors"
I don't want to and I will not spoil you experience from the movie, so I will not tell you what is really going on or what will they discover down there, but I will say, that you will be scared. If I would imagine myself in situation like that ... oh my god!
The movie has great scene and it has stupid moments. As the title suggest, there will be dark. Every good movie shows just a glimpse, this one is not different. Maze underground, only feint of light, creepy sounds, strange movements, loud breathing and ...
You will see... but I can recommend this movie if you are a horror fan. I was expecting less from this one. Despite the fact, that there are some elements, like "randomly" places cameras on the ground, always shooting the important thing or running and screaming and still shooting the right direction and things like these, pretty decent movie.
There is only one thing from holding me give more points ...When I first saw Blair Witch I was thrilled and really scared! Most of all I BELIEVED in what I have seen that time, I BELIEVED that I was watching a "REAL FOOTAGE". After couple of months I have found out, that it was a fake and nothing of it happened. This time I don't believe... maybe it is based of true story maybe not, I don't know and I don't care. Couple of years ago it would be 9/10.
The most important thing for me in this case is ... Really good movie! To believe or not, it is purely up to YOU!
The Company Men (2010)
Good movie, but ...
First thing you need to know about this movie is a fact that this will be about American people, very rich American people. It makes this movie more funny to almost whole rest of the world. If you are asking why? Read more. People born in America has absolutely no idea about few things. One of them is ... To Work & Has No Extra Money!
I know countries where people are more educated & harder working for 20-30per of the wages in US! And these people know what is means to weight money, to save money and to survive with almost nothing and in many cases be happy. This is big difference between us & US! Movie is talking about few very good earning managers (CEO and so) in a very big and successful company, some of the will loose job because of crisis and redundancy. Yes we all know this, we all know that this can happen to anyone these days (I happened to me as well, exactly the same reasons). Job is not secured in a world nowdays. Story goes further into the lives of these unfortunate people... how to pay for everything when I have no income, no money for mortgage, school, cars, loans etc (terrible thing, I wish no one lived it) Problem is (not for Americans) , these people has more than a 1 000 000 dollars for a year! ONE MILLION! For last couple of years ... and suddenly they have no money, no money to survive for couple of months, till they found something else! I understand that someone who has been earning 1 500 000 dollars a year has problem to find a job for the same money, but I don't understand HOW can he be WITH NO MONEY (plus he has pay check for next three months, 160 000 Dollars a week) and after few months they had to sell car, then house and FUNNY THING IS COMING ... they had to sell son's Xbox360! Because they could have afford it! This is funny for real people in rest of the world. I understand that if you earn millions a year (more years now), you will get used to those money, for the luxury and everything, to live like a star, but it is unjustifiable that they had no SAVINGS, at all! They weren't counting with something like may happen? If someone is capable of spending more than 150 000 dollars a week, every week, for years ... I am sorry I have to say it, he deserves it! Shame on him!
This is wasting of money, wasting of resources and unfair! These things will make this movie more comedy than drama (again, not for Americans). But, besides everything I have said, this is very good movie. You will find there everything about crisis. It is about frustration, why I can't find a job with my resume, why am I suddenly no one, when I was somebody. There is insecurity even in high places, no one is safe. You will see man's desperation, so deep, that some of them will find dead end with no way out. You will see like time can bring satisfaction in much worse work than months ago ... simply ... CRISIS! Plus one more thing, you will realise that the higher place the worse man you will became.
So this movie is very good, if you American you will probably love it (and hate it, because this happened to many people), if you are from "poorer" country you might find yourself angry about how this world is cruel and why! But I would love to be American and live American dream! God bless us all
Battle: Los Angeles (2011)
Independence Day is still the king, but ...
My expectations for this movie was really high, not because I would have seen the trailers (I haven't seen not even one), but I simply love movies like these! Catastrophic movies of all kind. Especially when there is plenty of money behind it, and that is what I've heard about this one. So all I knew was, someone will be attacking us! That is all I needed to know, invasion, effects, plenty of action ...
I can tell you right now, my number one sci-fi movie is Independence Day (and Avatar, but that is something different I think)! I still believe, that even after B:LA it is the king ... but! There are bugs in every movie, even in Braveheart or Aliens ... question is, how many time you must see the movie, to find them out? Battle LA is great from start till the end. Great acting, great camera, amazing visuals and sounds, good story (for this kind of movie) with not long delay in the start. And to tell you the truth I don't need story in movie like this at all! What for, to end like War Of The Worlds? End of that movie was like cartoon, every one lived (including, granny, daddy, mommy, even the DOG! Jesus Crist... that was annoying! No one, great movie, with terrible ending.
I can say, that after the movie I said, "wow" and "I wish there was some scene, where our planes where fighting with their planes!" You don't need it there, because there is much action and shooting and great effects (inluding promotion on RESISTANCE 3 for ps3 in one scene) that you will be thrilled! But things like these, have made Independence Day the best scifi movie for me! So, if you want action (almost war movie), with amazing effects, great high budget cameras and everything, you will probably like this movie, same as me! So every scifi action fun this is ... MUST SEE! It is 10/10, despite the fact there is couple of things I would make different!
Vanishing on 7th Street (2010)
It could have been much better
When I saw a trailer for this movie my first thought was "Looks good, something like I am Legend". Which would be great, if you are a fan of sci-fi & mystery movies. It is no spoiler when I say, that whole movie is about vanishing. Idea is not bad at all. Personally I love movies with story like this one, everyone is gone and no one knows why and what is happening. So far so good... but ... there are few obstacles. First of all, actors. They are not bad (completely) but they are not excellent (movie like this needs excellent acting). Second, money ... You do not need them in tho movie, but director and everyone else does. I mean, quality of the picture and the scenes and effects are not bad, but it is little bit under standard. And this is the thing which takes this movie down below. Almost in every scene you will have the feeling, "This should have been better if..." ... they had money for the shooting. I can easily imagine Will Smith in it, with Rydley Scott on his chair and I can guarantee you, that this movie would be 9 of 10! Like this, when everything misses something it is simple movie, where within 45mins you will be bored after that you will be looking for "bug" there couple of them. Like fire and gasoline, you will know what I am talking about, when you'll see the movie. Closing comment : It could have been much better with different actors and someone much more experienced on the Big and High Chair. Pity
I Am Number Four (2011)
I wish this was the first episode to the new series
Truth is, this movie is very similar to Twilight (romance a stuff), and also truth is, that movie is starting really slowly. First half of the movie is more like... talking with almost no action. But I can say for me, that it worked in much better way than in already mention Twilight (I was able to watch first part (ONLY) and I was so bored, especially with for me REALLY UGLY main character...) But I am number four is better, even if it is about "romance" (I mean the beginning of the movie) it is made better. Better characters (both genders), sometimes fun and plus from time to time, some great scenes with THE UGLY GUYS! (we are still talking about first half) But... there is HALF TWO! Second part of the movie is absolutely excellent. Because of two things. 1. Ugly guys are perfect (design, masks, the way they talk and kill) They are very similar to those in 30 days of night, so if you like them there, you will like them here. 2. Special effects are superb, great quality of the picture (maybe little better than usually) and plus to these, very good action scenes, with everything you would expect from action sci-fi movie. I was very satisfied with the movie at the end (and I am not a fun of Twilight, I didn't even see second and third part and I don't want to (just saw only every 15th minutes, when my gf was watching) The only problem this movie has... it is A MOVIE! It should have been a pilot for a new series and it would be great! With these effects and these monsters and bad guys, it would by 9.5/10 for the series! I really hope, someone will make it (because boring part is already behind us, and the real action have already begun.
Monsters (2010)
do not expect D9, Skyline or Mist ... this one is big disappointment
I love monsters (all kind) movies! But there must be ... something in it! It must not be action, but there must be something what will keep you thrilled, tensed. I was looking forward for this movie, according to the trailer, there should have been all of it. I have to say, there is nothing, not even at the end of the movie. If you are expecting something like latest skyline (which was brilliant, I really can not wait for second part) or older district 9 or even older mist etc etc, you will be disappointed, this movie has nothing, and can not be compared to these excellent movies, Really sorry for that. The only thing which was good was story, but that is all.
Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)
Masterpiece
Until now there was only three musical movies I liked. Classical GREASE (I think it's the movie almost everyone like), then ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW and the last TENACIOUS D - THE PICK OF DESTINY. I listen to metal music (specifically US POWER METAL) and as we all know, there is not so many movies with this kind of music... unfortunately. So Tenacious D was my real winner, but now...I have two! REPO! is amazing movie, nothing like I've seen ever before! I think it's a real opera (almost every dialog is singed) first ten minutes I was thinking for myself "this is probably not for me" but later (in the 20th minute) when first real song appeared I have changed my mind. Rock songs (sometime with even metal points, many time during the movie I had the feeling I am listening to EVANESCENCE or NIGHTWISH) remains until the end & one is better than the other. I can imagine to listen to the soundtrack. The main character REPO! has great voice (he is probably famous) but I know him only from BUFFY, that's all (sorry) The main character SHILO, is the same and everyone else is playing their roles very good! Even Paris :-) I liked the story, but I hope that nothing like this ever happen in our world... god save us! One thing may be minus for some people... violence and morbidity! Don't take me wrong, I LOVE IT! I love horror movies, the more blood the better! The more zombies the better, more dead people the better movie for me! HATE HAPPYENDINGS! But I can understand, not everyone is like me...I could see it with my own eyes...I watched this movie three times in two days! Fourth time it was with my girlfriend and she didn't like it...simply because she can't see blood. Clossing comment. This movie will became one of the best (in musical) and when it comes to me...I think, REPO! THE GENETIC OPERA will really deserve it! TRUE MASTERPIECE!
Rambo (2008)
Absolute movie
This is THE MOVIE! If someone say to you "there is too much blood and blah blah blah..." Do not mind him at all! New Rambo is not about blood and gore, Sly tried to show us what is it to live in god forgotten contrives! The violence is pure and explicit! But this is probably how it is there! The movie is Absolutely GREAT, one of the best ACTION movies ever! And on top of this, when you will hear the main song in the beginning, there will be tears in your eyes and at the end of the movie, you will feel sorry ... because this is his last movie! :-( The only "bad" thing about this movie is ... its too short :-) but as I always say, its better short and great than LOOOONG and stupid! Hail to the KINGS
Blood and Chocolate (2007)
It could be great.
I didn't read a book, probably like most of the viewers! Maybe it's a mistake, but I don't have this "type" of imagination, I need to see it! To tell the truth I had problem to see the movie to the end, why!? First of all, wolfs! And there is really few of them (no werewolves at all in the movie). So, if someone expected werewolves (like me) and action and blood (like in Underworld), he will be disappointed. Because I think this movie is "more" about love and romance than Shakespeare's Romeo & Julie. Story is not bad, not bad at all. Wolfs hiding amongs humans, lives by their own rules, and kill only a menace! But everything happens so fast, and exactly the way, viewers don't want to see! The good wolfs dies and bad human stand still. And sometimes I thought "how did he know?", or "where's the rest?!" Maybe it's because of the lenght of the movie, and maybe it was better and different in the book, but sorry, I don't care!. I don't want to spoil the movie, but probably everyone will know how it ends! However, I finished it, but for me these 90minutes was like 4hours, because I was bored. Summary, Big disappointment for me!