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Reviews
Obsession (2023)
Excruciating
Full disclosure: I didn't make it past the first episode.
I was ready to get sucked into a sex drama but this did not deliver, simply because it was not believable.
We are supposed to believe that a high profile surgeon, who likely interfaces with beautiful women all the time (his father-in-law is in parliament, his wife is an attorney, he's being primed for a Cabinet position), instantaneously falls for a girl-next-door? We are talking in a blink of an eye, this man goes from loving husband with a satisfying sex life (they make a point to show this) to soulless adulterer? I was convinced they must have met before, because the acting, script, and chemistry were absolutely inexplicable to support the thrust of the story, the name of the show: obsession. There was only once sex scene in the first episode and I genuinely laughed out loud, it was so bad: 30 seconds of grunting and it was over.
Also in the realm of unbelievability: how did the two parents create distinctly Indian-looking kids?
MH370: The Plane That Disappeared (2023)
Solidly Bad
The first clue that this "documentary" will go sideways and fall off the cliff of conspiracy, is the time they give the Florida lady who was convinced she found the plane via satellite images. She obviously did not find the plane and she wastes the viewer's time. You think, why is she even in this show? That's just a taste for how bad it's going to get, giving an unreal amount of time to Cuckoo Jeff and his Russian theory, and then come the French people with their American theory. I'm embarrassed for the people who produced this farce. There are a few knowledgeable experts in the show, but their voices are drowned out by the conspiracy weirdos.
Avoid this mess. It insults your intelligence.
Epidemiya (2019)
Unwatchable
Bad acting and bad writing, absolutely implausible plot lines. This series felt like a strange Simulacrum of what people think is cool and hip in a Netflix series, but isn't either. Like a very bad Guy Ritchie injection that doesn't work at all.
I think the Russian troll farms have descended upon IDMB in an effort to buoy this very bad series. The series also felt a bit like Russian propaganda, desperately trying to demonstrate how cool/hip/normal/badass life in Russia is (the teenager cool factor was painfully desperate).
I was open-minded to find something new to watch on Netflix, but couldn't finish the series because the writing was so laughably bad. And given what Russia has done to Ukraine, there was no reason to finish this show.
Kitz (2021)
Chalet porn and nothing more
There is NOT this much diversity and tolerance in Austrian dorfs, get outtttta here!
I never caught on to the central premise of the show. Wasn't the kid driving drunk? Why wouldn't you blame that for the reason of the accident? Simply breaking up a fling isn't enough to blame someone for one's death, super weak.
So many things were implausible. But everything falls apart at the end when you realize that if Dom loved Nessa so much to cause someone's death (laugh), then why did he fall for the average-looking townie girl? Also, a multi-million dollar gated chalet doesn't have security cameras? Fire alarms?
I was hoping for a rich kids comeuppance story, but this wasn't it.
Not enough Alpine views. Also high key don't believe the streets of Kitzbühel are that dead during the winter when it's one of the most popular ski resorts in Austria. And Nessa doesn't have any other friends in this claustrophobically group?
Stay Close (2021)
More Harlan Coben rubbish
I'm the idiot who keeps watching these Netflix Harlan Coben series, thinking they will be decent. Just because a writer is popular, doesn't mean they are good and I cannot imagine touching his books based on these series.
They are very formulaic and this one is no different. But the over-arching description? Implausible. Everything is implausible. A woman runs from her past by...staying in the same small city? With public social media? Her ex-bf who is still obsessing over her after more than 17 years? They don't even bother aging her - throw on a blond wig and suddenly she's younger than 20! How do many people go missing/end up murdered in this city?
Don't even get me started with the off-Broadway killer couple. They weren't creepy, just silly.
Roaring Twenties (2021)
Austin jumped the shark a long time ago...
I moved away from Austin 5 years ago after living there for 20 years and yes - spent my 20s there. But that Austin is long dead. It has been hollowed out by neocapitalist cultures. I watched the show hoping to wax nostalgic about the great Austin haunts, but they don't even go to these!! They have a date night but don't go to Peter Pan on Barton Springs?! Blasphemy. Whatever Austin these kids think they're getting is just a simulacrum of a place that doesn't exist anymore.
The cast is fine, if a bit boring. Is it realistic? None of them have jobs. The poor girl gets a job in a coffee shop; she will never afford housing anywhere near Austin without at least 8 roommates. The great ones are finished; I can't help but wonder if this generation knows they missed out on everything good.
And Just Like That... (2021)
100% unrelatable
I always laugh at the over-abundance of the angry reviews by people who are aggrieved by shows that are too "woke" - e.g. The show dates to cast a non-white, non-hetero character.
But in the case of this show...my god it's nauseating how woke this show tries to be. And I'm saying this as a lesbian in a mixed marriage. It just tried too hard. OF COURSE, Charlotte's daughter is an enby! Of course, Miranda is questioning her sexuality! Which actually implies some level of growth. Meanwhile, Carrie is exactly where we left her 15 years ago. Self-centered and boring, not nearly as witty as she thinks she is.
But what I really hate about this show, is the characters are now utterly beyond immortality in terms of wealth. They all take cars everywhere. In these post-capitalism, post-covid times, is this even cool? Was this necessary or relevant? It feels really out of step. At least before we lived and loved how these single women navigated the singles scene in NY. Now it's just...WASPY dull.
Red Dot (2021)
Swedes have poor survival skills
Starts out thrilling with loads of tension. The protagonists make a couple of poor choices, but okay.
And then when the movie picks up steam, you lose count of the missed opportunities that they could use to survive. Endless rifles lay about, but nobody thinks to take one. Why take the snowmobile when you can simply run through the snow in poor clothing and your leg shot off? Why avail yourself to the resources around you - these people are supposed to be an engineer and doctor.
At the end I just wanted them to die, not because they're bad people, but because they're so painfully stupid. People that stupid SHOULD die.
Killing Eve (2018)
Tedious
What started off as an interesting series quickly turned into tedium and absolute implausibility.
By season 3 I absolutely do not care what happens to Eve, never liked Sandra Oh (I don't think she's all that witty and definitely not attractive), but also stopped caring about Villanelle, the actress who carries the series.
I don't understand how someone so stupid is allowed into MI6, with an endless travel budget and simply not able to make rational decisions. When they called Eve brilliant in the 3rd season, I laughed aloud because there was nothing she did that any true crime fan wouldn't have figured out. I also don't understand how someone so selfish and shallow continued to run the show - like, UK, are you okay? I know y'all voted for Brexit, but assumed people running Intelligence were somehow smarter than this. Not to mention, plot holes abounded everywhere. Sorry, but Russians speak Russian - it was absurd how much they were speaking English. It's like all the gloss of the first few episodes - Villanelle's hits, her language range, all just fizzled out by the end of Season 1.
Sandra Oh, while I think is a fine actress, brought nothing here. There is absolutely nothing about her that V would become obsessed with - it beggars belief. As fashionable as V is, you're telling me she would be into the queen of dowdy? Psychopaths are inherently narcissistic - it just doesn't fit, totally implausible.
By season 3, it was also like they figured out teleportation - in one scene, they're in Russia, then London, back to Russia - it was dizzying and didn't make sense. Just sloppy, embarrassing writing. And whatever happened with that whole setup in season 2 with the internet billionaire guy?
Anyway I think people like this series because it looks good and is one big travel advertisement. But there is no depth here. Whatever there was, was plumbed by end of season 1 and is now just circling the drain. I'm ashamed that I sat through 3 seasons, thinking there must be something to this hype. There isn't.
Phoebe Waller-Bridge should stick with Flea Bag. If the show had been more plausible, then the dark humor could have worked - however without any credibility, it just made it outlandish in a bad way.
Baby Ballroom (2017)
Really charming kids
Pretty wholesome show; it's like the good version of Toddlers & Tiaras. I don't find the parents pushy at all, they seem to be the right amount of supportive and loving. The kids seem balanced and well-mannered.
The kids steal the show, especially the younger ones. They are just so adorable and pure, and happen to be exceptionally talented. I agree with the other critique - I wish they would show longer shots of the dancing itself.
I love the third daughter, blazing her own trail to become an astronaut. I hope she makes it to the stars!
It's a shame how much makeup the girls cake on, though, even when not dancing. It's an unfortunate trend and doesn't look good and I legit thought one of the Mias was wearing blackface because the makeup was so dark.
I haven't watched the second season but I look forward to catching up with the Zig Zag fam and seeing how the kids have progressed.
The Investigator: A British Crime Story (2016)
Season 1 not the worst, but season 2 is laughable
I'll dispense with a review of season 1, as that's well-covered here. But it's genius compared to season 2.
So season 2 is about a missing girl. But don't get too interested in her because the investigator jumps from suspected killer (Tobin) to another killer who has nothing to do with her disappearance, Angus Sinclair.
The worst part about it is this man builds his case for the Glasgow 3 on FORTY YEAR OLD EYE WITNESS ACCOUNTS! Even rookie detectives will tell you they're faulty, even when fresh. This man shows himself to be such a fraud.
Season 2 is a huge waste of time, each episode disparate from the one before, I don't know what I'm watching. I'm sure the family of Louise Kay who asked this man to investigate the first lady's death is thrilled that he completely abandoned their case to look at completely unrelated. Newsflash bucko, there are serial killers targeting women in every country.
Sex and the City (2008)
Vacuous
This movie taught me that rich people don't have problems and you hire a (Black) personal assistant to unpack for you.
Carrie is her usual narcissistic self who has no substance, not sure there is any depth to her and Big's relationship (Big is an exceptionally bad kisser). Big is some big "financier" but falls apart and chickens out because Carrie doesn't turn around and look at him? Okay.
How much racism is in the movie? Plenty. Charlotte revives the tired trope that Mexican food is unsafe to eat. Miranda says "follow the White Man with a baby!" when house-hunting. And let's not forget the fat-shaming the women laid on Samantha.
Carrie richly thinks that it was Miranda who ruined her wedding because Miranda told Big he was crazy to get married. Sis if your wedding becomes unmoored based on a simple comment, then there wasn't much to the relationship. Crazy terrible writing.
All in all just a bunch of vacuous, boring, materialistic, selfish women with too much money. You will find no female empowerment here.
Restaurants on the Edge (2019)
Absolutely cringing
Two stars for the locations, but ultimately unwatchable. It's really a travel junket for the three hosts, who have no demonstrated credibility for why they're on this show.
Let's start with the woman - if you're a designer, your vocabulary should be more than 20 descriptive words, which is probably generous. She says something is distinct AND unique! Or she'll put together a word salad where the adjectives are all antonyms, or just the words she remembered from HGTV.
The "chef" is no better. Who is this guy and how is it that he can just drop into a foreign place he's probably never been, and in an hour of shooting, is an expert on the local cuisine? His vocabulary isn't much better. His pronunciation of Tyrol was shameful.
So let's talk about the Austrian episode. The chef host scolded the restaurateurs for serving "influenced" food, so what did he do? His dish was Mexican Schnitzel (I can tell you, nobody will order that) and Hawaiian schnitzel - literally after chiding them for serving ribs. News flash! Americans aren't the only ones who eat ribs! Also, he chided them for serving Italian (caprese salad), so what did he come up with? PANZANELLA SALAD! His menu was exactly what he said they shouldn't do.
The three of them fundamentally do not understand Tyrolean culture or area, there were many gaffes and faux pas. Not a modicum of humility, just this pretentious attitude that they're going to futz around a few days and then know how to fix a place. The host guy made some allusion to the shirt looking like the Austrian flag - the Austrian flag, buddy, is red and white. Not salmon and white.
Like they don't even try and it shows. This show could've been cool but the execution is half-baked (does the restaurant succeed? Fail?) and the hosts are just unwatchable. Hard pass.
One Strange Rock (2018)
Will Smith ruins it
Why in the world would you ruin an intelligent series with the Fresh Prince of Bel Air? Deducted 3 stars because of him. Will's dad was in the Air Force, so he's qualified to talk to us about flight. Will's grandma gave him a compass, so he's qualified to discuss gravity. It's really that stupid. But it's downright insulting to have someone like Will Smith lecture us on conservation.
Mae Jemison, on the other hand, is an adorable inspiration. What an accomplished woman.
Locke & Key (2020)
I think a 5 is generous...
I'm about to start episode 10 and unsure if I will finish. Have there ever been more stupid, insufferable characters? Kids, adults, they all make stupid decisions!
My credibility is on the line, as I recommended this show to a few coworkers. It started off with such promise! But the story gets progressively stupider as the characters do.
Doctor Foster (2015)
Completely embarrassing for women
Where do you even start with this drivel?
The acting is fantastic but boy, these actors are failed by these scripts. Season 1 is okay, but season 2 is shockingly embarrassing - how can a supposedly intelligent woman act so stupidly? She's a doctor who cannot recognize narcissism and basic manipulation? She is the queen of poor choices. You end up watching season 2 in utter disbelief because none of it makes sense.
The basic premise remains in each episode - why doesn't she leave this crappy town that never accepted her? This question is never answered and just when you think she is FINALLY making the right decision - just kidding - she returns for more poor choices. I am embarrassed that women are this stupid and I'm embarrassed that Suranne Jones gives life to this regrettable screen-writing.
Clinical (2017)
No one would ever go to therapy if all therapists are this stupid
I'm not sure how this script ever got green-lit into a movie, got funding, etc - it is so bad and wholly unbelievable.
It starts with a therapist, Dr. Mathis, who is supposedly an expert at trauma therapy. Your first clue at unbelievability comes a few minutes in, where she supposedly does her in-between patient work, calling patients to reschedule and calling in scripts - at 11:00 at night. I'd be pissed if my therapist called me after 5:00; that would be a major red flag!
Dr. Mathis has zero concept of boundaries. She continues to see the disfigured patient, even after he does the obviously boundary-crossing behavior like showing up to her house unannounced, BREAKING INTO HER HOUSE! Like when he OD's and calls her - every therapist in the book calls 911, but not this one! She can handle it herself! She actually goes to a patient's home to treat him, because she somehow knows what pills and how many he took?? It's insane. Dr. Mathis is also getting terrorized throughout this, and she's so smart that she leaves doors unlocked or even wide open when she suspects an intruder, and manages to purchase the WORST security system on the market (did I mention that she treats patients in her home? Because of course she does) One scene she hears an intruder outside and goes outside to check it out, not taking a weapon. When she sees things are okay, she returns into the house...without closing the front door. Honestly you don't care if someone this stupid gets murdered, because she is asking for it. How did this woman make it through grad school?!?
The pacing is slow (how could this ever be considered a thriller?) and the camera angles and editing are just bizarre. Someone else said this has "first year film school student" written all over it and I couldn't agree more.
I'm not even going to touch that ending - to any viewer that was still hanging on by then, the director slaps you with the most absurd, unbelievable, completely stupid ending that was probably dreamed up by a 5th grader. It's just that bad. At this point, I consider it a comedy. I'm sorry to the probably professional actors who participated in this albatross.
Don't waste your time. And if you're a therapist, definitely don't watch because it's a total insult to your profession.
Black Mirror: Bandersnatch (2018)
Ho hum
Reading all of these "incredible" and "mind-blowing" 10 star reviews remind me of my 19-year-old self taking my first PHL101 class. Kinda neophytic.
I found it tedious and laborious. Saying this is a kid who LOVED Choose Your Own Adventure books and always had fingers in 2-3 different sections in the book to backtrack a couple of choices back. In that sense, the movie is very trail-blazing. But as a movie, it wasn't astounding. I got to where I hardly cared what happened next due to no character development, and you could see where the story was going ten minutes out the gate - they bang you over the head with it.
It didn't cause me to think a whole lot, and I love science fiction (okay hats off to the Philip K Dick Ubik poster, that was an entertaining book). The only thing I was questioning was what happened to Colin Ritman. But if you thought this was so mind-blowing, seriously, crack open a couple of sci-fi books and then you maybe have a different perspective.
Also, not rating this 10/10 hardly means "you just didn't get it."