Reviews

One might call me "typically male." I'm generally monogamous, I look only at women, I come from a wealthy neighborhood, and I will probably end up in one. Like most typical men, I've watched what we euphemistically (and falsely) call "adult films." I now realize that we call them "adult" because only a true adult can handle their immaturity and know not to emulate it. Pornography portrays what sex *should* be so poorly, and yet it portrays America's view of sex so well: as something disgusting, dehumanizing, and meant for private because it's embarrassing.

Shortbus gives us an alternative to our American view of sexuality by showing us everything that's wrong with it. First, you can have sex with as many or as few partners as you choose--even none. There's no "right way," no "best way," in general, and different people prefer different mixes. Second, sex for the feeling alone doesn't really satisfy--there is always love involved in good sex, even if only one's love of human beings in general, or love for one's self. Third, one's organs don't really determine gender--Shortbus gives us genuine examples of "men" who identify as men, as women, and as anything in between. The same is true of Shortbus' women. Fourth, any part of sex can be beautiful, or it can be disgusting and embarrassing (and therefore, in my opinion, immoral). The immorality of porn doesn't come from the naked penis or naked labia. Rather, it comes from the fact that the "actors" all dehumanize themselves and each other (rather than "make love to me," or even "f**k me," the female will demand that the male "f**k that p*s*y". The male will then proceed to f**k *it* in such a way that he looks more like an over-enthusiastic, bald red dog or rabbit. Whereas pornography glamorizes such situations, Shortbus criticizes them).

Here's a piece of advice that I intend to follow when I have my own teenagers: since they WILL see porn no matter what you do, make sure they see something like Shortbus too. Give them the DVD and tell them to watch it whenever, wherever, however they want. Let them show it to their friends. If you're embarrassed seeing these sorts of things with your kids (I was always embarrassed seeing nudity in movies with my parents around), give them the DVD and tell them they should see it while you and the other parent (or you, the single parent) go out in the evening. And tell them why they should see it, because teenagers learn best from openness and honesty. Or maybe you can wait until you catch them looking at porn, and show them that what the problem with porn is: that porn, and society, separate the beginning of a relationship from the climax (the talking, the kissing, the touching, the love, from the coitus) saying they're separating "nice from naughty." Ironic, isn't it, that puritan society and pornography shoot for the same twisted goal? Pornography does it because it's cheaper to "show the 'good' stuff" in a non-artistic way. Why does society? I'm not sure. But what I do know is that I agree with Shortbus' rebuttal.