Reviews

This is, undeniably, a very colorful cartoon. (In fact, "Tiny Planets" could not possibly be more colorful than it is. But, although the crew behind this computer-animation cartoon seem to make a very good effort at putting together something very special, the result is--in a word-- monotony.)

Here is the premise: Bing and Bong are two furry white aliens who live on a planet together. Everyday, after they've washed and had breakfast, they fly through space on their living room sofa--visiting the planets, and helping out the inhabitants in one way or another. (They might help to build a wall; or they might set up a show. Other times, they'll just explore the planets--and the "blockers" just wonder what in heck Bing and Bong are doing there.)

Bing is rather tall, pot bellied and has no mouth. He hums, grunts and sometimes groans. Bong is a cute little four-legged creature. He's got one buck tooth; he is always smiling. He can squeak and scream.

Bing carries around a brown bag, strapped onto his right shoulder. Just like Felix the Cat's "bag of tricks," Bing is able to whip out of this bag any and/or everything that he and Bong might need: anything from a long ladder to a record player.

Following them around on their journeys is a little robot by the name of Holly. Not only does she narrate their adventures, but she also tells them which planet to go to next, and what their mission is.

There are six tiny planets: the tiny planet of Nature, Technology, Light and Color, Stealth, Sound and the tiny planet of Stuff.

The exact moment Bing and Bong are finished with whatever they're doing, a crystal on Bing's wrist watch blinks and beeps. That means it's time to get back on their sofa. They buckle their safety belts, cut a rope with a big pair of scissors, and off they go... back into space--only to be stopped by robots directing traffic.

And, here we come to the most ludicrous part: these robots--first, we meet up with a green one, then a red one, then a blue one--are spheres with mechanical arms. They wear brown gloves. Propellers twirl on their heads. Although they can't speak, they're able to tell Bing and Bong that there's more work to be done by simply pointing in one direction or the other. ("This away, or that away?" we'll hear Holly say. Her mouth never moves, by the way. "Oh! It's the other way! That's where we've got to go!") What these robots are also doing is waiting for a trio of ... you guessed it... blockers, who're riding an asteroid over towards them so that a family of asteroid fish can cross. Personally... I feel like I must be missing something, there. Oh, well.

The most creative part of this cartoon is that sofa: when Bing and Bong make a departure from their home planet, the sofa soars upward, through a golden chute; then it goes down a big silver slide and drops into a giant golden hand. Next, a huge hook attaches itself to the sofa--and the hand catapults the sofa into space; we then see a long, thick rope reeling off of a giant golden spool.

When they return home, it's up the slide and down the chute. (Finally, the sofa plops down onto the living room floor, and the sofa becomes a bed; a mechanical arm comes out of nowhere to brush Bong's one tooth; a night cap is placed on Bing's head. A colorful quilt floats down as the odd couple lie down and close their eyes. The room darkens.)

"Don't worry," we hear Holly say. "They'll be back for more adventures tomorrow. Good night, Bing. Good night, Bong."

Time to roll the credits, folks. Interestingly enough, they go sideways across the screen. They go by quickly--but one certain name, you're not too likely to overlook because, for one thing, it appears thrice. And for another, it is a rather unusual name. (Kim Goody: a very talented young lady with a light, somewhat musical voice; perfectly cast as the voice of Holly and Bong. She also sings the "Tiny Planets" theme song.) Don't bother looking for the voice of Bing, though. You won't find it.

"Tiny Planets" is entertaining. It's mildly amusing. Quite well done. But, all that being said, here's a cartoon which could easily be seen as being a turkey. (Because it's also very overdone.)

I first watched this highly imaginative cartoon somewhat by accident one Friday night, after hours. I now watch it on a regular basis, Friday and Saturday nights on the Nickelodeon's "sister network," known as Noggin.

The premise: seven toys in a child's bathroom, that are alive whenever there's no one there.

Tubb's a pink frog. He stands on two legs, wears a yellow and red plaid shirt and chartreuse shorts.

Terrence is an alligator--who also stands on two legs. He likes blowing bubbles out of his nose. He has only one tooth.

Reg is a reddish-orange robot. He stutters a lot.

Sploshy is a starfish. Lavender in her front, yellow on her backside.

Amelia is an airplane. Blue fuselage, yellow wings and tail, and a red propeller.

Finbar is a shark. He loves to put an act of being tough and... "Argh, argh, argh!" ... cool.

Last but not least, there is Winona--a lavender whale. She can express herself only with huge smiles and small squeaks.

Just as they're getting ready to play together, one of them isn't quite satisfied with the arrangement. So, they'll tell themselves: "If only I could..." Then they'll think up some sort of setting in which they can at least try to do what they want. "Wow!" they'll then say. "I said 'if only.' And now..." (That's each story line's starting point.)

To say that the writing is good would be a vast understatement.The moral of each story is the same: it's best to be happy as you are.

For parents who remember "Gumby"... that's the sort of animation this cartoon is. (I guess that's the main reason why I like it so much. (It brings back memories of a cartoon I grew up being a big fan of.)

If only there were more cartoons like this. Wow! I said "if only." And, well... there is another stop-action-animation cartoon, also on Noggin, about a construction crew with talking tractors. "Bob the Builder" is also a good one for the little ones to learn from.

The message of "Rubbadubbers": be happy to be you. The messages of "Bob the Builder": teamwork and friendship are very important. (It might as well be mentioned, "Bob the Builder" is no longer being produced. It ran from 1999 to 2001.) "Rubbadubbers," though, which made its premiere just last year, is in production.

I first watched this highly imaginative kids' show somewhat by accident in the after-hours of a Friday night, about a month ago. I now watch it on a regular basis, twice a week: Friday and Saturday nights on Noggin.

The premise is a bunch of toys in a child's bathroom, which are alive at any time when there's no one there.

Tubb is a yellow frog--who comes across as a sort of circus ring master. Terrence is an alligator--who blows bubbles, and has only one tooth. As for Sploshy, she's a starfish. Reg is a red robot who stutters. Amelia's an airplane. Finbar is a shark who loves to put on an act of being tough and... "Argh, argh, argh!"... cool. And Winona is a lavender whale, who expresses herself with huge smiles and small squeaks.

Each episode puts the spotlight on a different member of the cast. Just as they're getting ready to play together, one of them is overly curious or, perhaps, dissatisfied with something.

"If only I could..." they tell themselves; then they'll think up a sort setting in which they can try doing what they want. "Wow!" they'll then say. "I said 'if only.' And now..." That's each story's starting point.

To say that the writing is good would be a vast understatement. Each one ends in a similar way--with the message being, in short, it's best to be happy as you are.

For any parents who recall "The Adventures of Gumby," that's the sort of of animation this cartoon is. I guess that's the main reason why I enjoy it. (It brings back memories of a cartoon I grew up being a big fan of.)

If only there were more cartoons like this. Wow! I said "if only." And, well... there is another stop-action-animation cartoon, also on Noggin, called "Bob the Builder." Also a good one for the little ones to learn from.

(Whereas "Rubbadbbers" messages are to have imagination and to be happy to be you, the messages of "Bob the Builder" are friendship and teamwork are very important.)

It might as well be noted, though, "Bob the Builder" is not currently in production. "Rubbadubbers" is.

If Rod Serling was alive today and saw Cinemax's "The Pleasure Zone," he might be aroused to call his lawyer to file a copyright infringement lawsuit--but he wouldn't be sexually aroused.

Each and every episode of this Cinemax exclusive series begins thusly: a very handsome young man or a beautiful, sexy young woman is sitting in their den. Their computer is turned on. (No pun intended.)

A mildly attractive--but strangely serious-looking brunette--shows up on their monitor's screen.

"Welcome to 'The Pleasure Zone'--where anything is possible," she says. "My name is Serena. To speak with me directly, type in the password."

So they do.

"Well, Debbie?" Serena might then say. "How did it go?"

What will then ensue is Debbie's date of three weeks ago with John. Or was it Seth? No, wait. I think Seth was the one whose girlfriend told Debbie about "The Pleasure Zone." Oh, Hell's bells! Skip it.

The premise of this series is an Internet dating service. But it's no ordinary dating service. No, no! Serena, you see, knows just the right man--or woman, whichever the case may be--from the very first time she is told a few details about someone. What sort of details does Serena need to know? Well, for instance, in the case of Nikki ... "I'm looking for a man who's interested in more than just a casual fling."

"I understand perfectly," Serena would be likely to reply. "And I think I have just the right man for you."

All Cinemax's series--"Nightcaps," "Erotic Confessions," "The Best Sex Ever," "Passion Cove"... and last but definitely least, "The Pleasure Zone"--attempt to answer two basic questions. 1) How much of a story can be told in 28 minutes? 2) How many sex scenes can be squeezed into that time span?

"The Pleasure Zone" is the least successful at serving up the sort of "pleasure" it attempts to.

The music is nice, though. Herman Beeftink--Cinemax's main soundtrack man--is quite talented. Perhaps one day his talents will carry over to the big screen.

Mel Brooks' "Blazing Saddles" (1974) is one of a select few films which can be said to be as funny upon the fifth viewing as upon the first. He, with Richard Pryor--who Brooks'd originally considered to play the lead role--wrote an epic sagebrush spoof which, in terms of laugh-worthiness, surpassed his spy spoof TV series "Get Smart" and in terms of madness... closely matches Stanley Kramer's "It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World!" A band of outlaws are appointed supervisors of a railroad construction crew by a shady lawyer, (played by Harvey Korman.) When they realize that the track's going through a pool of quicksand, they reroute--to go straight through the peace-loving town of Rockridge. After the outlaws' rampage through the town, the folks send a telegram to their "gov", (played by Brooks), demanding a new sheriff. They get a black man,(played by the late Cleavon Little.) It's only with the help of the once-was-the- fastest-gun-in-the-world, The Waco Kid, (palyed by Gene Wilder), that Sheriff Bart manages to earn the trust of Rockridge's folks. Also in the cast: John Hillerman, Alex Karras, and what would a sagebrush spoof be without ol' Slim Pickens. Oh, did we mention the late Madeline Kahn and Gilda Radner? For all you old-time movie buffs, watch for Mel Brooks' impersonation of a '30s character actor who--although he wasn't a big name star--his filmography is anything but small: Hugh Herbert (August 10, 1887-March 12, 1952). And as for Madeline Kahn's mocking of Marlene Dietrich (December 27, 1901-May 6, 1992) ... mah-vah-wahs!

Woody Allen, undoubtedly, has earned himself a reputation for comedies that only a handful of other 20th century directors had been able to. But just like any other directors, Allen's earliest works were not his best. Some of his films stand out like monuments erected in his honor; others stand out like sore thumbs. Case in point: "What's Up, Tiger Lily?" (1966). He did the directing, as well as some of the writing, but the original idea wasn't his. He'd been tapped on the shoulder by a producer named Henry J. Sapenstien, who wanted to do something that'd already been done to grind out a motion picture--buy a foreign project and alter it into something entirely different. Sapenstien purchased a Japanese spy move for $66,000 by the name of "Kagi No Kagi" which, roughly translated, is "Key of the Keys." Allen had the film's soundtrack removed and, along with the cast who'd be dubbing in their voices he wrote a script about Interpol and no-name enemy spy group, battling to get hold of the recipe for the most delicious egg salad in the world. "What's Up,Tiger Lily?" does have its moments, but as the plot wears on, it becomes only too clear how forced the humor is. The '60s rock band The Lovin' Spoonful--who performed the muscical score--have a couple of cameos. Producer Sapenstien decided to splice some recording studio footage into the film. Henry J. also spliced in two more things: 1) a mock interview of Woody Allen with a Japenese, English-speaking, reporter. 2) A striptease act by a Japanese playgirl. Neither of which pleased Allen; he filed a lawsuit against The Sap to keep the movie from being released. Woody agreed to drop the suit, though, due to numerous critics' very favorable reviews. Listen for the voice of Louise Lasser as very sultry safecracker. Lasser married Woody while the film was in production.

MGM's 1926 adaption of Nathaniel Hawthorne's "The Scarlet Letter" is, quite possibly, the best motion picture to have been released in the silent screen era's latter days. It can, undoubtedly, be looked upon as the best that two of that era's best actors-Lillian Gish & Lars Hanson-were paired up in. And, too, one very talented child actress, by the name of Joyce Coads, deserves to be given big credit. (She made only 10 more films before taking a final bow from the limelight; in her 2nd to last-"Devotion" 1931-she didn't get billing.) "The Scarlet Letter" should also be noted as, perhaps, the very best that Victor Seastrom- whom Charlie Chaplain had called "the best director in all the world" ever delivered. Just don't make the mistake of seeing this film as a good adaption of Hawthorne's novel. Because it's not. The film is a total of an hour and 20 minutes. Had it been really true to the novel, it just might have been longer than "Gone With The Wind." (And, speaking of the wind, as fate would have it, Seastrom directed only one more film in the US, which also teamed up Gish and Hanson: namely, "The Wind" (1928). MGM gave Seastrom his walking papers because he'd refused to give "The Wind" a happy ending. "The Scarlet Letter" of 1926 should also be seen by anyone who just might be under the mistaken impression that silent films can't leave a lasting impression.