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1/10
Run from this film
15 June 2014
I could forgive the low budget style of film making and less than stellar acting & effects, however the story was so poorly written and there's a whiff of misogyny within some of the dialogue and scenes that leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

But then so much about this movie was in such poor taste (and I'm a huge horror fan who has seen countless bad horror movies).

There's a problem when the lead character is so unlikable I actually wanted to see him step on the grass. Overall the movie is a huge disappointment considering a potentially very interesting story line. The makers of this film didn't seem interested in telling a story, instead they took an interesting idea and just threw in enough violence and head explosions to gain an audience.
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Blame (2006 TV Movie)
1/10
As if this was made 40 or more years ago
28 October 2013
While watching this movie I was trying to determine when it was made. From the appearance of it (and props like the phones) I guessed maybe in the early 1990's. - but if I was going by the blatant anti-lesbian, anti- abortion propaganda of the movie I would guess that it was from the 1970's or older. Imagine my surprise when I found out from IMDb that this offensive piece of crap (which really doesn't even qualify as a horror film) was actually made in 2006. I can't remember the last time I saw something so disturbing (in an incredibly offensive sort of way) that was made within the past 10 years. There were numerous moments while watching the movie that I wanted to shut it off, but I kept hoping for the payoff, some kind of legitimate scare, but it never came.
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1/10
Not recommended for mature audiences
16 July 2013
I should know better by now than to waste time watching movies targeting the audience of 14-18 yr old girls. At least The Hunger Games was somewhat entertaining. Beautiful Creatures was just embarrassing. Even the fantasy/supernatural elements to this sappy teen romance didn't help much. Watching the two leads (the lead female character being only 15 yrs old) sucking face every 5 minutes was nauseating.

And roping more mature, respectable actors like Jeremy Irons & Emma Thomson into a movie like this only helps a little. Since they're only part of the supporting cast there's only so much they can do. You know there's something wrong with a movie when the only scenes that didn't either bore me or irritate me for one reason or another are the ones without the 2 lead characters.
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5/10
Promising start before it goes kaput....
23 April 2011
Warning: Spoilers
I'm a big fan of vampire films, despite how the Twilight movies and numerous clones all but ruined the genre for me. So I had high hopes for this German movie about 3 female vampires who adopt a new girl into their all girls club. The opening sequence is quite spectacular, the soundtrack an alluring mix of classical and techno, all scenes are beautifully shot. Lena is a scruffy looking delinquent who we first see pickpocketing a Russian pimp, then gets chased by a young cop who of course becomes unbelievably smitten by her, and just manages to escape.

Lena then wanders into a rave and catches the eye of Louise, who's been searching for the special one for a very long time. After Louise bites her and she's given blood to drink she undergoes an incredible transformation from tomboyish rogue into a beautiful woman. She gets spoiled by everything money can buy (fancy clothes, expensive restaurants and a Lamborghini). Then after the allure of the wealthy night life, full of partying and speeding around in expensive cars, Lena quickly becomes unglued when the women kill some night guards {where did she think their blood came from before they drank from the pretty glasses?}. Eventually the police squad descends upon them, and things aren't so fun anymore.

The first half of the film is quite engaging, seeing Lena's transformation and seduction into a lascivious lifestyle. I particularly liked Jennifer Ulrich, who plays Charlotte, by far the most beautiful and interesting actress in the film. I think the story would have been more interesting had they explored the vampires long history together more in depth, and worked on more character development. Unfortunately the last half descends into sappy Twilight territory. The policeman who looks more like a pretty-boy-actor playing a cop than a real cop keeps popping up in the story and the ending is disappointingly weak. What's most disturbing is how the movie reminds me of one of those 1970's vampire movies, where the lesbian element is merely a plot device, intended only to tantalize, but never seriously takes form. The female protagonist is lead astray by the beautiful lesbian vampire, but of course gets rescued in the end by the dashing male hero and the big bad lesbian vamp gets vanquished, and you pretty much see this predictable outcome way before the movie ends. The film makers had the chance to produce something unique but it ends without much bite.

Jennifer Ulrich, the great soundtrack and some stylish cinematography are the only reasons I'd rate it has high as a 5/10.
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The Landlord (I) (2009)
1/10
Waste of video
5 February 2011
Again I was mislead by the overly high reviews for a crappy movie. I'm beginning to think I can't trust the IMDb reviews at all. I've seen low ratings for movies I thought were well above average, and all too often, high ratings for garbage, like this one. This happens a lot with low budget independent films, the film makers and their entourage often rate their own junk, to beef up ratings. It's ruining the rating features of this site. I watch a lot of movies, including low budget independent features, but this is just amateurish trash. Bad acting, uninspired writing, poor directing, cheesy effects that look like they were done in the 70's and tacky makeup work. This was not scary or funny. Don't waste your time.
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Wormwood (2006 Video)
1/10
Terrible, Just Terrible...
29 January 2011
I wasn't expecting much from a low-budget independent, but this was beyond amateurish. I'm sure there are 12 year old kids that could have produced a better movie than this. The acting was horrible - how hard is it to do a reasonable portrayal of a zombie? The writing is pure drivel, and there's no real serious attempt at makeup or special effects. I didn't realize before I watched this that it was possible to make a horror film so boring that it's painful to try to sit through it. I can only think that the 2 positive reviews were from those associated with this "movie" or their friends. This junk is a complete waste of time.
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