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xXx: Return of Xander Cage (2017)
This movie was TORTURE!
This is proof that you can throw a big budget at anything, but it's pointless.
This movie is so bad....the only word that comes to mind is "ew" or "lame".
The cheesy machismo, bravado, stupid attitude from "da hood". There's no real character development and there's so much awkwardness....it's just a painful experience to watch. Trying to pull off an Deepika as the hottie is laughable. The only two "serious" actors in this movie are Samuel L Jackson and Toni Colette, though I doubt their participation spruced up their CV.
You know what is the most pitiful thing though? That Vin Diesel, still thought he could pull it off or is able to pull off these cheesy early-2000's roles like the "tough guy" at 55.....he's not even that tough looking or "ripped" like Dwayne Johnson or Henry Cavill. Then again, he probably needed an easy paycheck from the Chinese production company.
DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME!
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
The perfect word to describe this movie: Silly
1) The acting in this movie just seems....lacking. Empty. Silly. There are too many jokes, too much stupidity (screaming goats getting annoying after the 30th scream), not enough character development except for thor and jane
2) Christian Bale's character was not developed enough. I feel like we didn't see enough of him. Same for Lady Sif (who disappeared for years). Same for the Guardians of the Galaxy. Same for Russel Crowe
3) Seriously.....Natalie Hershlag (Portman) as Thor? Be realistic! She's a meter and a spit, and she's supposed to be so powerful. I get the hammer is powerful. But her....no. Not believable>
4) TOO MANY REFERENCES TO SAME-SEX COUPLES (I. E: "MY DADS...", "MY MOMS....", FEMALE HAS A CRUSH ON ANOTHER FEMALE!) WTF...DISNEY TRYING TO BE SO PRO GAY-LESBIAN THAT NOW, AN ACTION MOVIE IS A POLITICAL STATEMENT.... I HATE MOVIES THAT HAVE TO PROMOTE THIS KIND OF STUFF...ONCE IS ENOUGH...TWICE IS TOO MUCH.
5) ZEUS! You see zeus for maximum 10 min...and he's fat, has a bad greek accent, is literally sitting alongside the Bao, the Dumpling God....wtf....oh...and his thunderbolt looks like a gold-platic plastic toy. It's a joke.
Conclusion: The movie isn't in any way serious, even the dark parts feel "meh", the acting was mediocre, such a waste on an incredible cast. It's entertaining to watch, but nowhere near the level of intensity, comedy, seriousness, drama of Thor Ragnarok.
Eternals (2021)
Non-sensible movie
I was unfortunately disappointed by this movie, despite anticipating it eagerly for years. The action sequences are underwhelming, the storyline doesn't make sense, on it's own, and relative to the other marvel movies. It's really annoying because it seems Disney is more interested in pumping out blockbusters with unfinished plots that don't tie into the corresponding universe. They make crap like the intermediary star wars movies that are not really part of the new trilogy.
This new movie doesn't make sense because Eternals were supposedly always around, and wanted to protect humanity, but when Thanos wants to destroy half of humanity, they don't get involved. Apparently, because they're only allowed to fight deviants...which he is too actually. By the way, neither does Arishem. If the birth of the celestials in the universe was so important to him, wouldn't a madman going around the universe trying to destroy half of all life everywhere be a considered a threat and worthy of destroying? Apparently, no, because Thanos was an eternal-deviant, but worthy only of human defenders.
Also, can we talk about the acting.... Seriously, no one on this planet asked for a Indian Eternal, and trying to pass off Kumail Nanjiani as hot or funny (he is supposed to be the comic relief after all) is ridiculous. Angelie Jolie's character Thena is silent but disturbed, fights well, but somehow forms a close bond, which an overweight asian eternal (Gilgamesh) who is supposed to be the "strong" one, because nothing says strong like a guy who's had one too many pizzas.
Disney has also been pushing the gay agenda down everyone's throats lately. I have nothing against the LGBTQ community, but was it REALLY necessary to have that male-male kiss and convince the world that a child can be raised happily by two men? Like in Avengers Endgame in the support group, there was a gay guy describing his date.
The whole movie felt more "slow", "cerebral" (which I appreciated because it kinda celebrates humanity, but ultimately, it's like "ok, where's the real danger?"), and disconnected with the past franchizes.
Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li (2009)
Best Street Fighter Movie ever
Honestly, what is there not to love in this Street Fighter movie.... Kristin Kreuk.... Chris Kline.... Moon Bloodgood.... It is the best comedy I have seen in a long time.
Chun-li is a fragile little dumpling that somehow becomes strong enough to destroy Bison. The most priceless thing is how Chris Klein walks around posing and squinting half the time and trying to act sexy, and always giving zoolander Blue Steel looks. It's hilarious. The conversation between him and Moon bloodgood is also so funny. They try to turn each other on, but it's like watching a bad 90's sitcom. This movie is the perfect combination of pathetic and failed franchize all in one....but Kristin Kreuk is good to look at ....especially when she is dancing in the club and trying to trap the lesbian 50year-old crime boss. I can't...this movie is too good!
Oh...and did I mention Robin Shou's bad make-up to make him look older? He looks like an old man had too much plastic surgery.
Watch the movie and have an amazing time :)
Combat Obscura (2018)
Interesting depiction
This movie is really interesting and well made. It shows the conflicting intellectual and spiritual toll war takes on individuals. On the other hand, it does a good job at depicting soldiers for what they really are: uneducated, narrow-minded, monoethnic, monolingual, violent, murderers, without any pride, honor, or courage, whilst convincing themselves they have all three. They clearly lack the wisdom and the intelligence to take or save a life. It conveys the true necessity to jail all soldiers for life, or give them the capital punishement. This movie provides a raw insight into the minds of individuals who are responsible for the destabilization of the Middle East, and for listening to even less educated politicians.
Transporter 3 (2008)
Not as good as the first 2 movies
The action is fine, but what annoyed me the most was the leading female character, who CAN NOT act. I know it was her first movie, but why choose someone who renders every scene, boring, pitiful, souless, etc...? What annoyed me too is that they tried to pass her off as a "sexy" woman....since when are redheads, full of ugly freckles good looking? Like a cliche, she looks at Jason Statham after a successful fight scene, and disgunstingly thirsts after him. The tone and rythm of this movie was completely off, trying to hard to be too serious, and the production team doing a bad job in making the characters feel relatable.
Zack Snyder's Justice League (2021)
Not worth watching unfortunately
I am a huge Zach Snyder fan. I loved most of his movies but this is different. Don't watch the movie. It's a fail. It's basically an emotionally, 4hr-overdrawn patch-job of an originally badly executed CGI mess with not enough new content...all so that Zach Snyder could satisfy his emotional needy artistic nature for his original vision which got disrupted by some "family tragedy" and years later the public is supposed to act as if it was good enough? It's basically the same movie, emotionally, cinematographically, plot-wise, etc....
The positives are the following: the original was worse. But that's like comparing a 3 with a 4 out of 10. Also, anything Christopher Nolan touches improves so thank goodness he was included here.
I look forward to another Superman based Zach Snyder movie that will be complete in its vision, craftmanship, and delivery...like Batman vs Superman was or Man of Steel.
Cake (2014)
Incredible performance by Jennifer Aniston. Worth Watching
I went into this movie knowing nothing, just hearing the name pop up in conversations and not really knowing what the plot was about. When I watched the move, I got sucked in. To sum it up, the plot is slow, and kind of uneventful....but, 5 years later, I still remember 2 things very intensely:
1) Jennifer's acting was so good....so heavy...I still remember the tone, the feeling of the movie years later (if you've watched Darren Aronofsky's Requiem for a dream, you'll understand)
2) The movie is extremely depressing, but somehow you end the movie liking it because the character growth seems hopeful.
I definitely recommend watching it.
Earthquake Bird (2019)
Slow, confusing burn
The pace of the movie forced me to take a break a couple of times. The acting is quite good. Unfortunately, the plot is simple, yet the ending falls flat on its face and you're left wondering "I don't get it....that's it?"
Secret Obsession (2019)
Obvious
It's so obvious from the trailer and the poster, what happened, who is the villain....it's too predictable. Before I watched the movie, I stated the plot. Then I watched it, just to be sure I was right. I was right. You are probably too.
Night School (2018)
Celebrates Mediocrity
Cute movie that celebrates mediocrity. GED ....really? How sad. Plot is too quick, and story is awkward. Did not keep my attention. I love Kevin Hart but this is by far now one of his greatest movies.