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Reviews
The Dukes of Hazzard (2005)
Not as bad as many will say...but still bad.
OK let's go over something; any movie that is remotely sub-par will be bashed on the internet and not be shown any mercy by those who discuss it. I mean really, there's been so many sub-par films in the last few months that people are just getting in on the act for the sake of bashing them.
Dukes of Hazzard is definitely not the worst film ever made, not the worst film of the year, it's not even the worst this summer. It is just really, really, mediocre.
Now, my only bias directed upon the film is that I like Johnny Knoxville. I'm well aware that he has the acting skill of a paper bag, but it doesn't matter at all as he's my Jackass idol.
OK so as for the actual movie: Boss Hogg wants to strip mine Hazzard County, and of course it's up to Bo and Luke to stop him and save their homes. Along with help from Uncle Jesse, Cousin Daisy, and good natured rednecks Cooter, Sheev, and Enos.
OK so pretty cookie-cutter. The dialogue is passable, car chases are very enjoyable, humour is lacking for a so-called comedy, and the a lot of the performances are VERY hit or miss.
But really, the flick doesn't try to be anything more then it is. Frankly, I can think of much better ways to waste an hour and a half of your time...but there's definitely a lot of worse ways too.
Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)
So much fun.
Once Upon a Time In Mexico is an awesome example of the action flick that has a somewhat simple story, really good acting, good gun fights, and is just really enjoyable.
The movie may not totally live up to the previous installments of the El Mariachi trilogy, however it is still pretty good.
Johnny Depp proves again that he can completely carry a movie on his shoulders as his portrayal of Agent Sands was just the dry, witty, character that makes the movie.
Everyone else does good enough in their roles, Enrique Inglasias pulls off his role surprisingly well, as much as I hate to say that.
Stop complaining, its a fun movie, just sit back, shut your brain off for 90 minutes and enjoy.
The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
Most dramas wish they could be this
The Shawshank Redemption is right up there with my favourite movies. Its probably the best deep story example of a movie that I like.
The film is a touching tale of the dehumanizing effects of a life in prison, a modern version of which can be seen on HBO's Oz. I digress, the first time I saw this movie, I was actually touched by the story.
I began to feel crappy for Andy, I understood Red's bitterness, disgusted when Andy crawled out the crap pipe. The movie tells a very very powerfully depressing story, but to keep the watcher from getting mad has an amazingly uplifting ending, that makes the story seem worth it.
Amazing, enough said.
Predator (1987)
Arnold in his prime...
Along with its great showcase of action, and special effects Predator also brings some vintage Schwarzenegger to the table.
The movie follows the story of Arnold and Co. and they go into an African jungle to rescue some pows or something like that. However that isn't important as the real plot shows up soon enough as we learn that an alien is hunting the solidiers for sport. Not exactly Shakespearian but decent enough.
Arnold is definetly in full tough-man ass kicking mode here. The supporting cast gives strong enough performances, despite any terribly signifigant lines for any of them.
Predator is definetly a great choice for a bit of mindless action fun, with great special effects for its time, and with surprisingly good laughs to go along with the action.
Scary Movie 3 (2003)
pure and utter crap
Before I begin, I didn't go into this movie with a serious tone, I didn't go into it with high expectations. But despite both of those, I was disapointed.
The film perhaps works in the sense of moderatly funny scences with a couple laugh out loud moments, but they don't come very often. Even as a spoof this movie doesn't have any direction, it manages to put Signs and The Ring completely combined as its major plot. Why not try a groovy idea of centering the spoof around one movie with minor gags associated to other flicks.
However, with the lack of Wayans brothers involved in this movie there is a definete plus in the lack of dick and fart jokes predominantly featured in the first 2 movies. Dick and fart jokes can be effective in certain movies, mainly if not used as a transition.
Yeah so back to Scary Movie 3. Dialogue is weak, even for a spoof the story is weak, acting is weak, gags are weak.
Don't bother.
Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones (2002)
Almost as bad as Episode One
Attack of the Clones takes all the mistakes that Lucas made with Phantom Menace (bad script, using special effects to compensate for the bad script, Jar Jar) and makes them over again, just not as badly.
The script is one of the most boring things that I have ever listened to on screen. The crappyness of the script is completly put into perspective when you realize that every main actor/actress in the movie is quite competant (execpt Hayden) and still the dialogue comes out terrible.
George decides that to make up for the terrible script the film should just be loaded with special effects, hoping that people just want to look at a screen and will ignore any audio. Special effects are used by Lucas as too much of a crutch, and the ammount of CGI makes Matrix Reloaded look like on them. However, the CGI used is all done very well and looks great so that redeems it a little bit, even if the reason its in the film is bad.
Finally, Lucas doesn't fulfil every person who saw the Episode One's wish by killing Jar Jar off, or just writing him out of the movie. He decides that the film needs 2 comic relief characters, Jar Jar and 3PO, which is a terrible idea. If he couldn't choose to keep Jar Jar in the movie he should've just looked on the itnernet and found out that maybe Jar Jar isn't a popular character.
I went into this movie with really low expectations after the tripe that was Phantom Menace and was still diaappointed by it, I now find myself awaiting Episode III in 2005 with the lowest expectations possible. But with one hope, that Chewbacca kills Jar Jar in the most visually pleasing way possible.
Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (2003)
"Forget everything you thought before, your looking at a trilogy" - Randy Meeks, Scream 3
In T3 the new rule laid out in Scream 3 was brought into play, and I couldn't have enjoyed it more. T2 has been one of if not my favourite movies since I was a little kid and I had been looking forward to T3 since then aswell.
The story was well written and paced good, the dialogue is a bit on the weak side, but still pretty solid. Every performance in the film was done well enough with the only exceptions being a few of the bit characters.
Visually the film is absolutly stunning, the effects all look very crisp, clean and natural which is something of a rare quality in the bullettime style of today.
Mostow gave a great effort directing this, personally I feel that Cameron couldn't have come close to pulling this off as he likes to focus his directing projects moreso on the story and actor's delivery of dialogue. Mostow's previous works show that his films have the perfect action and dialogue balance with his projects.
Now, into some depth with the story. My only major complaints with the story is definetly just how well the John and Kate characters' pasts connect. It just seemed too cliched, with the whole "lovers from the past reunite" crap from the basic chick flick formula.
Sypnosis: If your looking for some deep story here, don't. T3 is just an action packed visually spectacular film to see. It takes the first 2 films in the story and continues the progression (T1 - Drama with action overtones. T2 - action with dramatic overtones. T3 - action) of the series, essentially showing what any future Arnoldless sequels will be like. I really enjoyed the film, and am again hoping for another Terminator movie.
Phone Booth (2002)
The movie stinks...of awesomeness
Well, I was going into Phone Booth expecting a good movie to kill an hour and a half with. Instead I ended up watching a great movie that seemed alot longer, but in the good sense.
I was completely unsure of what was gonna happen, and found myself starting to actually care about the characters which is a pretty rare occurance in today's films.
Colin Ferrel gives a great performance in his role, truly showing that he has incredible range. On an unrelated note, I only found out he had an Irish accent about a week ago. He completly captures the character in his deliverly by at least looking like he's trying to not look scared.
Kiefer Sutherland's job with his role should be etched in the mind of every voice actor on the planet. I don't think any other actor on the planet could of pulled this off so well.
Every other performance in the movie aren't really memorable (with the possible exception of Forest Whitaker) but are solid and keep the quality of the film up.
My only real complaint with the movie is the ending. It just took a lot away from Sutherland's character, showing his face took away alot of the mystery surrounding him.
Regardless the movie kicks ass, probably the best movie of the year that doesn't completly cater to the Academy. It deserves at least a rental so go do so.
Anger Management (2003)
Good enough for government work,
The movie was nothing special but entertaining enough. If you can get over the long awkward pauses in the script and skip to the interludes with Sandler and Nicholson then rent it as soon as it comes out on VHS and DVD.
Sandler's usual cast members pull off their parts pretty good, with Merisa Tome delivering a good performance. Nicholson is his smooth self throughout the movie, but Sandler seemed a little bit off with his delivery. Call it a 7.