Reviews

Disappointing. This movie is sub-par for a B-movie action flick. I was excited to see Tiger Claws since I love Bolo and Rothrock, but man this movie just flat out sucked my enthusiasm for the genre right out of me. It was so bad that I may never watch another Jalal Mehri film ever again. This is the second Mehri movie that I watched and both were pretty sad. The first was TC 2000 which was saved by Billy Blanks, Bolo and the unbelievably beautiful Bobbie Philips.

In Tiger Claws the acting is weak across the board. When Cynthia Rothrock is the best thespian in the cast you know you are in for a rough ride. Mehri of course is deadpan with no personality or charisma. Bolo is great as the villain but really just lurks around until the fight scene finale.

As far as the plot goes, it is similar to Blood Moon where some greatly skilled martial artist is killing all the big time celebrity and champion martial artists around town. Mid-way through the movie you learn that it is Bolo. Rothrock and Mehri are the detectives who find out that the killer practices Tiger Claw Kung Fu and track down his dojo.

All is well and good but you know what blows about the story line? You never find out why Bolo is killing everyone. They never give a motive. Where's the pay-off? Even on Scooby Doo you find out the antagonist's motives. At least with Blood Moon you find out that the killer was DQ'ed from an MMA tournament and wanted to kill all the participants (though you never find out why he has two prosthetic fingers).

Finally, the opening scene will throw you. Rothrock working vice dressed as prostitute with a black wig and sunglasses also sporting huge implants. During the scene I was wondering who the hot chick was, she looked fine. Then she walked down an alley where the rapist followed and she opened up her karate on him. After the fight was over she took off her glasses and wig and what do you know it was Cynthia Rothrock. I had no idea, this is the first movie that I had seen of hers where she is augmented. Nice.

As far as the overall movie though, it does stink. I love the No Retreat No Surrenders and the Hong Kong stuff that Rothrock has done but this Jalal Mehri took a decent premise and some good character actors and basically crapped the bed. Even the fight scenes are weak. Watch this movie only if you're a die hard Bolo or Rothrock fan. The middle 30 minutes slow and boring, so much that I found myself checking email and playing Dragon City on my Nexus... not a good sign.

Somehow I missed Wrong Turn 3. I really liked WT1 it was good and sort of like a Hills Have Eyes meets Deliverance vibe. WT2 was pretty good with Henry Rollins running the "Survivor" reality show in the backwoods. Then I saw this movie...

The movie starts out great with the deformed inmates overrunning the asylum. I love insane asylum movies, throw in a freakshow and I am there dude.

The "college" students look to be thirtysomething. The college victims are six hot pornesque chicks and three or four dopey guys. I must agree with the other comments. It is 2011, everyone has GPS on their phones. These guys aren't going to even have a google maps printout to the cabin? The height of stupidity occurs when the college kids manage to capture the whacky hillbillies and have them locked in a jail cell. The last remaining guy throws kerosene everywhere and is set to burn the cannibal freaks but the lead chick puts a stop to it saying that it is immoral and that they shouldn't sink to the hillbillies' level. Mind you, this is after she has witnessed the freaks pull the head off of her friend, after they rolled out her boyfriend's head like a bowling ball across the assembly hall and after she's witnessed the freaks slicing off pieces of flesh from her other friend, while he was alive, and flash frying it with potatoes and onions and eating it in front of him while the other are filleting him alive.

Of course, they escape the cell and mutilate everyone. Honestly after that stupid lead chick decided not to kill the crazies, I wanted all of the college kids to get eaten.

Good setting, bad movie, bad acting all the way around. Don't bother watching this one. If you liked the first two, this will be a big disappointment.

Ever since seeing Misty Island Rescue last spring with Diesel 10 coming into the last scene and vowing revenge, I've been flat out excited about seeing Day of the Diesels and Diesel 10 get his revenge. Diesel 10 is by far my favorite character on the show. My son loves him too so when I realized that it was fall already I remembered about the movie and took my kid down to the store to buy it. Both of us were excited about watching it.

It starts out great. There is a big fire on Sodor and all of a sudden Belle the fire engine train pulls up out of nowhere and just starts hosing down the flames. Everyone is impressed. Sir Topham Hat acts surprised, he didn't know that there was a fire fighting train on the island. Stop right here. This ignorance by Topham Hat plagues the movie and just isn't in his character and just doesn't make sense. He owns the railway on Sodor and the docks, how can this "rogue" fire fighting train be running about the island getting fueled up with coal and water all unnoticed. I think that the writers were quite a bit lazy here and didn't want to give a back story to Belle. Okay back to the story. After Belle's brilliance Topham Hat expresses his desire for another fire fighter. Belle recommends her buddy Flynn who is a high-rail vehicle that can ride on the rails or on pavement.

Thomas is infatuated with Belle and spends all of his time with her and Flynn leaving his best friend Percy in the cold. Diesel, apparently acting on orders from Diesel 10, senses Percy's weakness and works his way in telling Percy that he should hang with the diesels because they would have time for him and treat him real special. Eventually Diesel's manipulation works and Percy finds himself rolling into the Diesel Works. If ever any of you have had any doubt as to whether or not there was racist implications to Thomas and Friends, your doubt will be erased here. Of course there are Thomas' comments about diesels being "dirty and devious" and "never go to the Diesel Works," that is expected. However it is the visage of the Diesel Works that will erase any and all doubt. The Diesel Works are on the "other" side of the island, and when Percy rolls through its gates are we in for a treat. The Diesel Works is a shanty building constructed of corrugate metal in a haphazard fashion. Every building is run down and dilapidated. Burned out cars and other junk litter the entrance to the home of the diesels and there are even rats shown moving about. Percy is scared, and why not he just entered the ghetto. Cabrini Green, Magnolia, Treme. The effect is not subtle.

As Percy drives up to the main structure, he is greeted by Diesel 10. Yes! This time they used a much better voice actor than in Magic Railway. Diesel 10 now has affected English accent reminiscent of the stereotypical homosexual villains of the past (think Malcolm McDowell in Blue Thunder). Much better than the dumb Brooklyn accent that he had in Magic Railway. So this new, improved Diesel 10 with 20% more evil shows Percy how Topham Hat has neglected the diesels and their Diesel Works. They can't fix themselves because the crane is broken and they don't have essential equipment. Again, here is where the writers were just plain lazy. Why would Topham Hat neglect his diesels and not give them equipment necessary for repairs and maintenance? I mean they are on his railway and the friendly diesels like Mavis, and Salty are just about every show. Why would he want them to fall into disrepair? By the way they are hanging with Diesel 10 at the works.

So Diesel 10 pleads his case for a new Diesel Works to Percy who agrees that it isn't fair that the facilities for the diesels are deplorable. Percy tells Diesel 10 that he will give the information to Thomas who will then in turn tell Sir Topham Hat about the need for updated diesel facilities. Apparently Thomas' word carries a lot of weight on Sodor.

Meanwhile, Percy gets Kevin to fill in for the broken crane at the Diesel Works. Then all hell breaks loose as Thomas and Victor go to retrieve Kevin. That is when Diesel 10 and crew decide to take over the Steam Works as it lies vacant. Here is where the movie gets disappointing.

The diesels end up just playing in the Steam Works spinning fast on the turntable, lifting each other with the crane and just goofing off. I really thought that they were going to trash the place and burn it down to the ground. That is where it looked where it was headed since Diesel 10 had one of his henchmen incapacitate Flynn by stealing his fire-hose. Disappointing indeed.

The final disappointment is when Sir Topham Hat arrives at the Steam Works to put a stop to the shenanigans. He scolds Diesel 10 who cowers at Hat's stern voice. I was under the impression that Diesel 10 was his own man and didn't follow anyone's rules. Apparently he is just another slave on the plantation.

I won't give away the big happy ending but while the movie looks great and Diesel 10 shows potential, it is ultimately a disappointment in my eyes. When are we going to see a truly evil Diesel 10 who maims Sir Topham Hat and destroys a few of the goody goody steamies? I thought this movie was going to be it, but it is not. Let me just add that while I was let down by the movie my kid loves and has already watched it 20 times. Great for kids but not for adults hoping for evil and terror on the island of Sodor.

Okay, my old lady pulls this up last night and we go into it knowing nothing. From the get go you know this family is acting. I was thinking maybe they're spies or better yet some terrorist group sent in to infiltrate some upscale gated suburban community to maybe attack a senator or blackmail him into control after he sleeps with the hot daughter.

Instead of all the great ideas posted above, turns out that they are "selling" their lifestyle and products by moving into an affluent neighborhood and trying to be trend-setters. Honestly I kind of liked the idea but think that the story captured on film doesn't do the story justice. Maybe there is a book and it's better, maybe not.

The problem is that what is shown on film is the Duchovny/Moore family influencing their neighbors to buy a few golf clubs, some sunglasses, a plasma TV, and a car. I guess that you are supposed to fill in the blanks that these people are in turn getting the whole city to buy the same clubs and sunglasses since it looks like they live in the most high rent area, but this isn't ever shown. Not even in some music montage. My issue is that I can't see some advertising company bankrolling a project with four full-time people on the payroll along with having the overhead of renting a 8000 sq ft house in what looks like the most high value neighborhood in the state just to close on a riding lawnmower, a Nintendo ds and some boxes of frozen sushi. I mean when you add it all it it is only like maybe $60,000 of merch that it looks like they sold when you include the car.

Now comes the cliché part. Sure they are all actors but Duchovny really loves Demi Moore and is pushing for the romance the whole movie. Once the "kids" start getting into trouble then the "family" starts to morph into a real family with Duchovny and Moore coming together to help the kids and Duchovny and Moore finally consummating their pretend marriage. So cliché, oh wow now they are like a real family... Puhlease.

It all ends for Duchovny when his neighbor, the boss from Office Space, maxes out his cards and can't pay his bills because he is trying to buy merch to keep up with the Jonesesand ends up killing himself. Duchovny quits and the rest of the family move to a new town to start up shop again but with a new dad. Lame.

This movie seems like a good place for the director to be crapping on consumerism, but it isn't really preachy at all. Only when the Office Space boss is dead do you have a feeling that the movie is maybe 10% preachy. But they don't show the neighbors buying stuff and still feeling empty inside. They only show everyone "Ozzy and Harriet" happy and Duchovny upset that he can't get it on with Moore.

Final thoughts, get the number of Moore's plastic surgeon because she is looking great in this film. I remember her in Charlie's Angels where she looked all ripped and looked like her face was going the Joan Rivers route, that must've been ten years ago. In this movie her face looks fresh but natural, it looks like no medical assistance was used in the creation of her face. She looks a good solid 44 yrs old. Absolutely amazing for a broad nearing her sixth decade.

As for the movie, skip it. It doesn't know whether it wants to be a comedy, social commentary or love story and thus the plot just seems to go nowhere as there is no driving force behind the story.

I put off watching this movie for 12 years thinking that it was just a remake of Hardcore from the 70's with George C. Scott and Peter Doyle and the private eye. Hardcore was one of my favorite movies as a kid. Jism Jim and George C. had some great lines in the movie and it was seedy and scummy enough to inspire this 13 year old's imagination.

Fast forward 25 years to last night, my old lady wanted to watch a thriller on the Roku and this one popped up so I caved in and watched it. You know what? This is how a remake should be done. The story is altered enough to make it fresh and new elements are added to boost the juice.

The original Hardcore had the guy's runaway daughter get into drugs and porn and associating with a snuff film producer. George C. Scott takes over from the lame private eye and teams up with a peep show girl to traverse the sex trade underground in search of Rattan, the snuffer, and his daughter. Once he finds her, she is alive and it is over.

In 8mm, Cage is the private dick trying to figure out if the girl on film is really dead and he teams up with a loser who works at an adult book store to traverse the seedy underground of the sex business. Of course the chick really is dead, but Cage finds the film makers and gets revenge for the snuffed teen. Also there is a twist with his client's lawyer being in on it and double crossing Cage. So this movie is similar to Hardcore but darker and with revenge, action and a lame twist thrown in.

I've got to say that Schumacher must've found the scumiest locations in each city to shoot because man he made New York, LA, Cleveland, and Pittsburgh look like the most depressing places on the planet. Great acting by Gandolfini as the seedy and greedy producer and the guy who played Dino Velvet, ever so creepy and deranged.

If you've been putting this off because you're a fan of Hardcore and think that this is just a straight remake, give it a look see. It is different enough from the original to be interesting and has some more elements to it.

As far as the twist. It was lame and almost predictable. A better twist would have been to mimic the old movie and have the girl alive but all strung out and in love Dino and the Machine then having her kill Cage so that her mother never finds out where she is. Now that is a much better twist and in the spirit of the original film. But overall the movie was dark, depressing and good. Give it a chance. AnchovyD